Artini Healing Arts

The Human Experience

2011-07-11T04:05:00.000-07:00

A few months ago someone asked, "What does the soul crave the most" as we were talking about healing? I remember sitting there moving around in my chair wondering out of the whole universe what was it that every soul wants?.....Think about it. It is not something you hear every day. Then with a big smile they said, "Drama".

"What!" I was thinking what does drama have to do with anything that we are talking about. It's not possible that we as these beautiful beings want drama in our lives. Then as I sat there I saw how much we love drama... Look at our lives. We love to hear what is going on with others whether it is in movies or the next door neighbour we want to know. "Inquiring minds want to know"....

We want to see, feel, know or experience it if not through second hand but through our own lives. Granted the sting is not as harsh when it is second hand but we still manage to add our experiences and feelings into the equation.

Those T-shirts with the message that was so popular a few years ago with the expression "Drama Mama" or "Drama King" are just a little example of what we look for in our own lives. We wear it like a badge of honour.

It is meshed in our culture like the news, movies, music, books, talk shows even in our own lives when we react to something or someone creating an emotional stir within ourselves and others. What an amazing teaching tool it is and yet we become addicted to it. We can't wait to see the next episode or hear the next load of gossip in someone else's lives or even our own. We fixate on it and hold close to us.

I began to realise that what goes hand in hand with drama is the judgement along with all the emotions that flood in like a drug. Wow! how intoxicating is that? But it is the drama in our lives that teaches us the most and it is when we learn not to be emotionally tide to it and that we are in control of our own emotions that we become the master of our own lives.

It is when we can look at another person and not judge them as they move through their own drama and not being caught up in it that we learn that we are standing in a personal power that allows us to be there for the other person. I am not saying not to be sensitive to what the other person is experiencing but I am saying not to be in the middle of it adding to the situation. It is about us moving in the experience free from judgement and just allowing that other person to just feel what it is like to be in that moment so that we can all grow.

Namaste,
Ana

In the Heart of Things

2010-12-31T07:18:00.000-08:00

This morning I got up and visited with my husband drinking my cup of hot tea and just enjoying the morning. We sat in bed and he began to work on his laptop and I decided to watch a little TV and enjoy the rest of my tea and found a movie that I had been trying to finish this whole holiday season called "Love Happens"

I got in on the last 10 min which is where I left off a few days ago. What was interesting is that it is about a Grief speaker helping people and it was ending with him discovering something in himself. What touched me was the relationship between him and his father in law. Just before I noticed my eyes were wet and my heart opened up to the touching scene and this warm energy shot through the core of my being with this amazing feeling of it moving out through my skin.

The emotion was so beautiful and the heat that moved through my body and out into my outer energy field was loving and healing at the same time. I took a moment to stop and be aware of what was happening to me. This is something we all experience but mostly we are unaware as our emotions are so powerful that they move outside of ourselves and effect others.

Smiling to myself I felt good about how we all feel when we hear music, watch a move or experience a piece of art. It is powerful as it moves the energy around us and brings it alive.... Now the trick is to be able to focus of that powerful energy in a loving and healing way toward others to help bring healing in our world...... The connection is through the heart!

Collage of Life!

2010-09-14T13:11:00.000-07:00

So I am taking a class on Monday nights and one of the projects is to make a vision board. It is supposed to be what you want out of life and what you see yourself doing that makes you happy and successful. So if you are a spiritual person then yours will reflect that and if you are a material person then it reflects that too or both.

The task is simple. Come up with what you dream about and find a few magazines that you can cut out. Or you may draw your own pictures on a board for you to see your goals. Ingenious as your subconscious mind sees most things in picture images and you can then connect to your Super Subconsciousness mind that is connected to everyone and everything this is what you want out of life.

It then tells the universe and the Creator this is what you want and like plugging into a computer for spell check it tries to match up your dream with the right spelling. "Ask and you shall receive" or manifesting....really all the same...

So my husband and I decided we would sit down this morning and do a vision board together since we are in transition is our own lives and there is lot of room for major changes. We sat down with our coffee, magazines and materials to create a family vision board. What we discovered is that we both had very different ideas of what we wish to do and create. It was so different that we decided to create our own vision boards as we could not come together on a dream.

After the third cup of coffee and lots of stressing out over what the other one was wanting in life and almost a upset of balance in the house. We suddenly stopped and realized that the reason we could not pull our resources together as both of our energies were being funneled in two very different directions. If we could not decide what we wanted together as a couple then what kind of message were we sending out?

Then what I call "Magic" took place.. that is when you realize that the other person is quite different than you and you began to listen to what they want and they listen and hear what you want. Wow!! Communication, compromise and respect for the other person and their needs and wants. Suddenly we were understanding what each of us were trying to live out in our own lives and understood. It was all clear and all on a collage of visual images cut out of paper.

We had just completed couples therapy 101 without the big price tag. To end the story I would like to say that we got it together and completed our collage on one poster board but we didn't. We each have our own collage and hung them up together side by side in our bathroom so we see it each day. We did agree that the combination of the two different ideas is not a bad thing but they do work hand in hand to create the same dream.

Namaste,
Ana

In the Moment

2010-09-02T18:16:00.000-07:00

The week is flying by again. I learned something new. I discovered that the song "Bullet Proof" plays in my mind when I am picking up energy around me that is not good for me. It seems to be a reminder to watch myself and to protect myself from negative vibs that I am susceptible. I love it that my angels are watching out for me in the world.

Energy is really something that I don't think a lot of people think about and yet we do send out signals all the time. The other day I was driving to visit a friend in Ft. Worth and something triggered my emotions that made me angry. I sat there at the red light getting mad and realized what I was doing. I could feel the heat and energy moving through my body and out of my skin into the air.

Then I heard, "pull it back and send it out of my feet into the earth." I did as I was told and felt the anger release..Next the thought came for me to feel love and to send it out instead. Amazingly, I could do this and again experienced the emotion moving through my body and out of my skin only this time it was a beautiful feeling....the whole experience took the time for the light to turn green.

Wow, if I could change my feelings in a moment and send out love instead of anger on to the world how powerful is that? Then the thought came that we live in anger and fear and those emotions are sent out and become part of the air and energy that is around people, animals, plants and the earth. No wonder we are all so angry but we have the power to change it all. As I drove on down the road. I realized that I was my own personal power. It felt great!!!

A Gift of Love

2010-05-20T19:05:00.000-07:00

today as I am driving to see a friend, I started to sing in the car which can be a little awkward when you stop at a stoplight and people look in your direction. But no one could hear me so I was singing at the top of my lungs when something beautiful hit me right square in the heart and connected my brain.

All I knew is that I was perfectly normal with my everyday concerns and the next thing I know, my heart is opening up as tears roll down my cheek and joy swells throughout my whole body. Next, my brain was somewhere in between space and where I was sitting at the light. (stop light)

The thought that went through my brain was a child holding their breath until they turn blue. I don't know about you but I have known at least one child in my life who did that which is an odd event.

Next, was my daughter playing the piano as I walked through the house listening to her emotions as her fingers struck the keys. But it is not the force of hitting the keys that betray her but rather it is the vibration of the notes that hang in the air that blend to create the sound.

What I realized was that love is like the notes in the air which are all around us in everything, every being, even in what we don't see but we like the child are holding the breath until our bodies turn blue. We hold it until we are starved and deprived of the oxygen that carries life through us. So I guess the question is....Are we really living when we are in that state?

The light did turn green and as I drove on, I started to assess my own life understanding that love was only a breath away.

Namaste,

Ana

The Wedding Pot

2010-05-20T15:36:00.000-07:00

As I was getting ready for a friend to come over for tea, I decided to pull out my grandmother's old tea cups to make it a little special and honor her. When I looked in our old china cabinet for the cups I found a gift from my wedding 19 years ago.

There it was, displayed in the case for show, but long forgotten. What really struck me as I picked it up was that I was transported back to that time. There I was sitting in my friend's living-room in the past opening a box and pulling out the wedding pot and examining every inch.

One of the traditions that my friend told me as I held it in my hands was that the Pueblo Native Americans where we lived, give a Wedding pot to the newly-weds as a gift. It was a vessel with two separate openings at the top which flowed down into the belly representing the two becoming one joined together, holding life within.

Beautiful story, I remember saying but as I held it I dropped it and it cracked. "Oh No", I said as an overwhelming sadness came over me, but my friend pick it up and said," Ana, "it's OK and I am glad that happened because you need to understand that nothing is perfect. Life is certainly not perfect and marriage is not perfect."

"There are cracks in everything as there are many disappointments in life but the real key is the love and the extra care that glues it back together that becomes the strength of the vessel. "

Then time began to move again from the past to the present as my marriage flashed before me in a collage of pictures and emotions, some bitter and some sweet. Life was such a good teacher and here in my hands was a small reminder of what life was all about.

As I placed the pot back in it's spot I could hear the doorbell ring. It was time for tea.

Blessings,
Ana

Word Power

2010-05-12T08:47:00.000-07:00

My father who passed away a year ago used to remind me when I visited him in South Texas that words have power not only written but spoken. I don't think that many are aware of just how much their spoken words not only affect their relationships but reveal who they are behind the mask.

No, I am not just talking about a Freudian slip but what you can learn about a person if you dare take the time to actually listen to the words and the way that person puts their words together. You may find that you have a key to a secret garden. If you listen without projecting your own experiences and really hear what is being said you find that you can then communicate on a whole new level.

If we look closer to we will find that we get careless and sling words around without realising how powerful our words are and disempower someone without knowledge of what we have done. I guess that is why teachers warn to stay in the moment. You have the choice to be aware what your own words can do.

Also, another aspect of the power in our words are when we speak our fears and concerns often without the intention of speaking our truth. The words slip out of our mouths and I am not talking about when we put our foot in our mouth that is something different. It is something that seems to come out often with the speaker being unaware that they have shared something so intimate about themselves that reveals the true depth of their relationship and a tear within their being.

It is truly amazing what words can do and I have only touched a tiny part of what they do in our lives. As you look into words you may find that they can empower, tear, impose, build, heal, create ourselves, others and the world around us. What do you do with your words?

Namaste,
Ana

In the Heart of Wounds

2010-04-28T09:30:00.000-07:00

So this is something I had learned and found to be true. It is that we all have a wounded child living within us. No, not on a physical level although many may accuse others of that. But it is more on a mental or energy level. Yes, I am sure many of you already know about the inner child and some may have done some healing work with it but for those of you who wonder what I am talking about I wish to explain.

How many of us will be having an adult conversation when all of a sudden we get a reaction from the other person that is somewhere in left field? By this, I mean you may have by accident touched a trigger point which takes that other person back somewhere in their childhood that they in someway had experienced a wound. That means that the person you now are talking to is no longer the adult but the child with an open wound.

Now, you then experience a reaction from a child's point of view because the adult has never healed or understood that the open wound still exist therefor your conversation has turned into pouring salt on the wound and the reaction is dramatic. So now you are having this conversation with a two year old, a five year old, a thirteen year old or what ever age that other person had the experience.

This is where your compassion comes in if you are able to recognize that the other person is no longer with you but reliving an experience from their past. First and most important thing is not to take anything they say personally as they are speaking from the heart of their own wounds and if your intentions were not to wound then you are on solid ground. Take a step back and analyze your own feelings with the understanding that they may say something to spark your inner wounds or child.

Allow yourself to take a time out if you need to knowing that what the other person is experiencing is very real to them. Take care of yourself and be gentle with your feelings and emotions as they are not thinking but reacting from a trigger. You may not be in a position to heal them or even make things right but you are in a position to understand where you are.

So many of us have these wounds and we often without thinking speak from these open wounds not realizing the damage that it is causing in ourselves and our relationships with others. As we each become aware and awaken we begin to realize that we have choices and that we can heal from those painful experiences while granting grace to others. This is another small step towards healing and understanding those around us. Although, if we all took such a small step it would change the world around us.

Blessings,
Ana

The Silence of Grief

2010-04-17T07:08:00.000-07:00

As I stepped off the plane from our trip to India I didn't realize how really exhausted I was from the flight and layovers. My husband, who is an Engineer, calculated that our trip home was about 27 hours in standing in lines, air and delays. Not to mention all the security checks and customs we waited for.

All in all, I must say that our whole trip was a wonderful experience so it never occurred to me that a few days later I would go into a grief state. We returned on a Monday and I began to feel a great loss or hole in my life and by Wed morning I was hiding in my bathtub sobbing as my heart felt like it had pieces missing. I know from my teachers that when the body grieves it is OK to allow the tears to flow and not try to stop them, but why was this happening?

As I sat there in my tub crying I went over all the things that we had done when we returned and even called a friend who's husband was in the hospital to find out how he was doing. He was fine and in good spirits. "This must be a part of the jet lag," I remember thinking to myself. I had called and emailed my friends and family to let them know that I was back and had received emails and phone calls of happy greetings that we had returned safely so why was I in a state of grief like someone died?

Out of the four closest friends that I run around with, I had not heard from one. That was not unusual as she didn't like phones, but when her emails bounced I decided to go and visit her to let her know that I was home. As I drove up to the house and I saw her van parked in the driveway a wave and a thought went through my head..... "It is like she is dead".

"What a terrible thought!" Why would something like that sweep though my mind. I had to say to myself, "that is not true!" "Quit thinking things like that!!!" So I walked up and knocked on her door waiting for her to open the door. No one came so I thought, "OK, she must be running around with a friend" and so I left a message on the door to email or call me as soon as she could. I missed her!

That was Wednesday and it was Thursday night that I received a phone call. The call was the sister of my friend who wanted to let me know that my friend had been in a coma while I was in India and that she had died that morning. All I remember was that my mind froze.... kind of like having a brain freeze when you eat too much ice cream. I tried to hear what she was saying but it was like listening to someone with cotton in your ears. I thanked her for letting me know and hung up.....

Shock, numbness and then grief came and went the next few days...... Even though I know that death is not the end, my body was going to go through the grief with, or without, me involved so I allowed myself to watch myself and experience my feelings as waves of emotions moved though me for the next few days.

It lasted for a good week and by the end of the week my spiritual beliefs, my soul and my body seemed to merge back together. The grief had moved through and I was moving back together as a whole person. I am not saying that I don't miss my friend but the grief that took over my body began to move out not taking over my life. I was able to live again with peace while still sending love to my friend where she is now.

It was weeks later that I began to realize that my body had picked up the fact that my friend was in transition of leaving this world and that even though my brain was not aware of this my body was fully aware and already in the morning stage. Wow, we are all so connected even when we don't even have a clue what is going on.

Then I also realized that the day that I went to her home I also knew as the thought went through my head.. Even in India I was had a feeling of loss as though someone had died but pushed it aside thinking I was just being dramatic...Yet, here again was another experience that we can pick up energy and can read in between the lines and that our bodies are connected as much as our soul but our minds block us from taking in the signs.

Just something to think about,

Blessings,
Ana

The Circle of Life

2010-04-01T07:52:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you but in the past I have not really given a lot of thought of the food that I have been placing in my mouth. I did know that vegetables and the lower fat food is much better for maintenance. I understood that the body knows how to break down the food in my body and make it into fuel.

Then there is the understanding that the food that we put in our bodies might not be the right food and that when it breaks down the body throws it out because it can't use it therefor by not eating the right food we can starve ourselves even though we eat massive amounts of it.

Of course we all know that food has preservatives, hormones and pesticides in it so that we need to watch out for that. And a lot of us go Organic and watch where we buy our meat. No that was not the problem as I have taken classes and nutrition all though my life. Food is something we can not live without and something that even with all the research and new ways to keep it preserved we are still learning how it works.

About two months ago I was enjoying a nice glass of white wine with my friends over a dinner party and it was there in the middle of eating and discussion that I raised my glass up to my lips to take a sip. That was when it felt like time stopped for just a few seconds and a knowing came over me that the sip I was about to take was more then just a sip of wine. It was a form of liquid energy that would merge into my body and into my whole life force that is more than just my body.

This was then followed by a thought that if I took that sip, that is what I would become as that is what I am putting into my body and energy field. Not bad or good just an awareness of the whole process of putting something into my mouth. Next, my attention whet to my plate and a scene of the meat being prepared and the fear that the animal experienced came rushing into my body that I looked up to see if anyone was watching.

I could not only see it but felt it..... I pushed my plate aside but as fast as this happened I was able to turn it off so that I was not as aware of what was going on as we all talked and moved on to the next course. It was not until a few days later that I was reminded yet again of what I was placing in my mouth and was able to reflect on what had happened and that in some way this was a lesson for me to pay attention to......

As a lesson goes this was what I learned form the experience is that food is not just food or fuel but it is far more important than that. It is a merging of energy and the energy that the food carries are not just the physical form that we see and break down in our stomachs but it is also a life force of energy surrounding and in our whole being.

There is a movie that comes to mind called "Like Water for Chocolate". In it the story line is about a young woman who is in love and is forbidden to marry so she turns to food as a release of her passion. As she creates and prepares this food she puts into it everything that she feels for her beloved causing quite stir as people who eat her cuisine find that they to feel her passion.

It has been years since I saw this movie but being reminded of it helped me to understand that the person who is creating the food puts a lot of their own energy into it. The animal or vegetable has its own energy and it is no wonder why we have so much trouble with our stomachs and digestion when so much emotional energy is put into our mouths.

We are finding that not only do we have our physical bodies but we also have emotional energy that can also play a big part in our health affecting us mentally, emotionally or physically. So what happens when we add everyone else's emotional energy to the pot?

Please, know that energy can be changed with intention so prayer is huge......

Ana

Healing Stones

2009-07-15T15:07:00.000-07:00

I have had a lot of people ask how the different types of stones have healing properties, and the best way I know how to explain this is by the atomic make up of the stones.

As most of you know from your science classes in school everything is made up of atoms. Everything has its own way of being put together with the atoms so that it is created. With this simple idea you can then see that a piece of jade has a different atomic structure than a diamond.

Now, think of the ways the atoms move within each stone. You can't see them with your eyes but you know they are there. Also, know that your energy field can pick up the movement because your energy field is also made out of the atoms that are constantly moving.

So now you have a person who's energy field is weak because of something they are going through. Remember to that emotions are energy... ,so that means their energy is not vibrating as high as it would if they were happy or excited.

For example....emotional trauma which like to settle in the heart area. Ever have a heartache? A stone like green Diopside resonates a healing vibration of atoms that helps sooth the heart as it fills in the gaps. Almost like a cup of herbal tea only you don't drink it....."Smile"

It is like a guitar in a music store where you can pluck a string and the other guitars will resonate on the same string even though you never touched them. They are in tune with the vibration of that note. You are no different than a fine tuned instrument that can get out of balance or tuned. And the things that are around you are also in line with your energies as you live on this earth.

Don't forget that color also has a vibrational energy that can be measured and will also help with healing for the same reasons. They can play a big part of why you reach for certain colors in stones as you need to be in sync or need that healing property in your energy field.

No magic here..... Just a sience ...... A natural process of living.....

Blessings,
Ana

Ripples

2009-07-13T08:46:00.000-07:00

I wonder if we are ever aware of the lies that we tell ourselves? We find something destructive that we identify with or someone else tells us and we hang on to it. The worst part is believing it. What is truly interesting is how powerful these lies are that change our lives.

I was watching a TV show a few years ago and people who were hurt in high school by others were coming on the show to hurt the ones that hurt them. The sad part was that you could see that what ever the believed the other person said about them was true and they carried this opened wound for many years changing their lives for good or bad. What power we give away to others......

Most of the time the person who was brought in had no clue that they hurt someone else because of their own pain. Other times the person confronted was still carrying around some old baggage which was unleashed on the air as they lashed out. It reminded me so much of the wounded animals that used to be used as entertainment as they were fighting for their lives in a pin while other animals that were starving and trying to eat them. As you look around, what do you see?.......

The hardest part I think when one is clearing the old baggage out, is to be careful being around someone else who is in pain. When you are clearing out things they don't just go away but come up time and time again until you deal with them in a healthy way so you heal. That may mean that something may come up which might hurt someone else so be careful who you are around when you are clearing.

The whole point in growing is not to hurt anyone else and not to point fingers at someone, when we are all wounded from something.

If you are asked by someone else to help you then mirroring someone so that they see themselves is OK, if it is done in love, remembering that you to have things that you are dealing with to. Amazing, how learning to be gentle and kind is not as easy as we think but can be achieved with much effort.

Those of us who are learning to treat others "Not" the way you were treated when it was in negative form can change the world. Remembering what is a lie that we are holding on to and protect might not be something worth protecting in the grand scheme of things.....

How many times are you aware of yourself and others talking out of old wounds? What is it that makes you still believe a lie about yourself?? What is it in ourselves that we have to learn again to love ourselves unconditionally?

As I learn I have noticed that when I hear someone state something that I know is untrue it has no effect as I wave it off as information that has no power over
my thoughts when there are better things to think about. Still other times someone can make a simple statement that strikes the hart and hurts. By working through the process of learning if it is something really needs work or an untruth we can then heal wounds through our love of ourselves and others.

The full human ripple of how we effect each other is enormous on how it touches so many. If we were to act in love and to realise as we take control of our own personal power we could change so much in the world. And help with eliminating so much fear.

Ana

Definition of the Self

2009-06-26T07:57:00.000-07:00

What is it that truly defines you? Is it the clothes that you wear, your job, the people you hang out with, money, position or your family? What makes you, You? Do you define yourself with the things that other people think or see?

Is it your reputation, how you deliver yourself and handle yourself in front of others so that you put on a tight corset around your inner being and can only be this certain type of person who others deem worthy that becomes a definition of the self? No, I am not saying to lose your integrity but remember who are you trying to impress?

Who is the real you and if others catch a glimps of the real you will they go off screaming? I doubt it........ What are we as humans trying to hide? What are the things that put fire and passion in our lives as we seek to learn and grow in our own experiences? Who in your life do you let define who you are and you realise that they are only projecting their own lives and fears?

What is it like, to not walk in someone else's footsteps and tare off the mask that we all wear to be who others define us to be? How hard is it to make that break and be comfortable with our true selves and talents? What does it take to be comfortable with who we are inside?

Ana

In the Beauty of the Spirit

2009-06-10T14:15:00.000-07:00

Wisdom and guidance comes in a language that only connects us to our Spirit as we connect to the Source of our Creator. Who are we, unless we are connected to that Source? It is by remembering that our inner connection is so important that we do not hand it over to someone else.

Letting go and clearing out the old, so that we can make way for the new, can be unimaginable to us as we move through the experience of loss. But it is our understanding that by doing so we are moving into the true path of our souls and opening our lives to a higher level of growth in our Spirits.

What better way to test our faith in ourselves as we learn not to let the material things of the earth keep us away form where we are to be connected. It is by remembering that we are the spirit that lives in the body having a human experience and that our lives are only a flash in time but the the lessons are eternal.

Change is never an easy thing to do yet we live day to day with both the birth and death of our loved ones around us, reminding that time is only a fleeting moment. It is by not getting stuck in the the man made rules and regulations of the religious order that we learn to trust ourselves in our own personal relationship to God. It is our own spiritual growth to be aware that the changes in our lives will move us on our personal journey of this life.

I am not saying don't be religious but don't let that stop you from connecting. You were made in the image and loved by the Spirit of the Holy Spirit and the true Source. So by learning to connect you are opening up the healthy connection between you and the Creator and become personally guided within your soul.

Blessings,
Ana

Facing Our Shadow Selves

2009-06-07T08:18:00.000-07:00

The shadow side is something that many of us seem to fear in ourselves as we discover a side of us that we want to hid form others. Often this is something that we are afraid if someone else gets a glimpse of, they will turn way and hide.

So what is the shadow that we allow it to hold us back and why is it apart of us?
Everyone has a shadow as no one escapes this. So if we all have it, then why do we judge others for having it? Please note, this is not to be confused with the Dark Soul. But know that both the Dark Soul and the Light Soul have the shadow. With this knowledge we still find it hard to let others know that we have it.

A few years ago, I was in Taos, New Mexico and had the privilege to meet Ted Wired who is a Minister and Councilor who introduced me to the idea of what the shadow was all about. I learned that the shadow in our lives helps us grow and learn form our experiences here upon this earth.

The fear of our own shadows can freeze us as we move through the experience which cause us not to move on to a higher understanding of how to move past the darker nature of ourselves. It is when we become stuck that we begin to judge others for the shadows within ourselves.

Fear now becomes the obstacle of how we view others and ourselves and we become tormented in our own shadow and project that upon others. But if we are aware of our shadow selves and realize that when we shed light upon this area within ourselves, it is almost like turning on a light and finding that the dark shadow in the dark is only a chair with a coat hanging on it.

Freedom is brought in by shining light on our own inner fears and learning to move though the experience as we learn how to grow. In truth, by facing ourselves and discovering what we fear that others would judge, we learn that we can forgive ourselves and not judge others with the same fear.

So what does this mean? Major healing within the soul, that is all......... Self acceptance and acceptance of others as we learn that the shadow is only there to teach us how to move onto higher ground. And by moving through the shadow to the other side, into the light, we find peace within ourselves.

Love,
Ana

A Flash from the Past

2009-06-07T07:05:00.001-07:00

I think for many of us we forget how much the energy around us and in us affects us. I know that I for one, even though, I try to make it my intention to be aware, I don't always do. So that is when I am caught off guard, when someone or something comes up and surprises me.

The other day my daughter and I went shopping for a dress for her to wear to my little sister's wedding which is coming up very soon. As we were walking into the store, she brought up the subject that she had been hurting in the joints of her hands as the heat and humidity was climbing.

She then went on to tell me that she decided that it was not something that she felt she needed to experince, so she envisioned a light of healing energy that was around her hand and in her hands. With that she then scraped the pain off with each hand like sloughing off a coating of wax.

What surprised me was that this is an ancient technique of energy work, that I had been learning about with one of my teachers and had not imparted that knowledge to her or anyone in my family. It is a healing practice that helps to relieve pain. And I personally felt silly doing the technique with others. So where did she get this knowledge?

This brought me to speaking with one of my teacher's who imparted the information that a lot of the healing techniques are passed down and embedded in our own DNA. It is almost like being down loaded though the cellarer memory and structure of our ancestors. So maybe the Bible is right, and we do pass what we do here on earth, form generation to generation. Sins or healing is all shared as it is recorded in our DNA and the make up of our cells.

Interesting, as I am exploring that thought..... I am learning that even things that I know intuitively are not my imagination, as learn to trust myself with the help of many teachers. I have been learning not to stand in my own way.

So here is my daughter, who is becoming into her own with not only that intuitive knowledge but the ability to access the energy to heal. How much of this kind of thing happens to our children and we tell them it is their imagination and to move on? What kind of abilities and spiritual gifts are we squashing because we where told the same or rejected it ourselves?

As I look around and have learned to open to the arts of energy and healing, I see so many children with the gifts of reading energy, energy work, intuition, healing, seeing, and connecting others to their spiritual side, who don't have the encouragement and validation of what comes so naturally. I talk to those in the family who are aware of the gifts but blow it off as a childhood fancy.

Which brings me to my own experience and what I know to be true as it has been an major shift in self discovery of how these things work and flow in a stronger connection to myself and the Creator.

Some of my own knowledge was taught to me by my own father in the past but I rejected it myself as I wanted to fit in with the everyone else, yet there are things that come with natural ability so that I have sought out teachers for answers. Moving through this, I have found that my children are amazing teachers themselves.

Many Blessings,
Ana

the Gathering of the Souls

2009-06-05T01:30:00.000-07:00

I was working with a wonderful teacher this past week, and this story was told to me once before, and I was gently reminded of it again, about the two kinds of souls and how they came about here on earth. One is the dark soul and the other is the light soul.

The reason why there are two types of souls, is that dark souls decided to come to the earth without the blessing of the Creator. They decided to break off and come to this life experince with their own agenda, but they didn't realize that without the blessing of God they would not have the beautiful light energy that everyone else has. So the dark soul is constantly seeking the light of the souls with the divine spark of light.

The light souls have the blessing from God to be here on earth, to live and learn within the plan of their lives. They are here to work with other souls to improve themselves all within this plan and the spark inside them is the light they shine from God as they are connected.

Now, you must know that a dark soul can never be light as they do not have this blessing, and the light souls have the blessing so they are always light even when they stray off the path and become dim, because they carry the spark of the Creator.

The dark souls are attracted to this light and will often use the compassion of the light soul to try to suck the energy and light from the light soul. This will cause the light soul to be confused, in pain, and wonder why, if they are trying to help, why their light is beginning to dim.

Remember, the light is the spark and blessing from God, so it can never be taken away, only covered up. It is when the light soul learns that they are being sucked dry, that they will have to learn to move completely away form the dark soul, that is trying so hard to use their light for their own agendas. The separation from the drain of the dark soul will restore the light back to the light souls, so that they may move back onto the path of health and peace, and the soul work they are here to do.

What we don't realize is that a dark soul looks like everybody else on this earth. They don't have four heads and breath fire with a large wart on their nose. They look and act like everyone else. The only difference is that you will know a dark soul as they drain the light's vital essence and energy away to attract other light souls, as they try to hide behind their light.

The misuse of power and the need to control is another way to recognize these souls. Even the dark souls can tap into and speak with a gifted tongue of the heavens so you can be fooled into thinking a dark soul is full of light, when in truth, the dark soul is looking for the light they never have.

No, these souls are not demons but lost, as they decided to do things their own way without the light, blessing, or spark of the Creator. These souls are surrounded by chaos, un-health, unrest and peace is lost with the misuse of the power they crave.

A dark soul will use projection of their own fears upon the light soul to bring their light energy down as a way of power and control, as they never feel really good enough, no matter who they are, or where they are. This has nothing to do with the shadow side of the soul as both the light and dark souls still have the shadow to deal with.

Redemption is between them and God.........

Peace be with you,
Ana

Stuck Emotions

2009-05-29T06:37:00.000-07:00

So, I am talking to a group of friends and the subject of being held hostage by our own emotions comes up. I loved this, because everyone can relate to being stuck and just like the commercial says, only with a twist, "I am stuck and I can't get out."

Now, I must admit that positive emotions are amazing and, as far as I am concerned, can stay as long as they can last. But the negative ones need to pass on by without leaving a calling card. Only it seems that it is the negative emotions that we get stuck in and really seem to notice.

It just so happened that I was listening to one of my teachers talk about emotions and how we need them to listen to, so that we can use them to live as warnings or signals, as they were created to help us get along is this old world.
It is when the emotions get stuck and we are not in tune with ourselves that this becomes a major problem.

A past trauma may cause an emotion to get stuck and because we as humans don't like pain we send it away without dealing with the emotion that reminds us of the past trauma. Sounds a lot like cell memory or Post traumatic stress for those of you who like the scientific terms.

The reality is that now when you come upon a similar situation, you will experince this past baggage of emotions as it is now registered in your cells. This allows you to revisit it over and over until you finely decide to deal with it.

OK, now that we are aware of the stuck emotion we have to go through the process of revisiting the trauma and moving through the emotions in a safe environment with someone you trust and very qualified to help you with this. As for a lot of people the experience will be very real but will be different for each individual.

Truth is that our emotions are powerful, healing and helpful as they are the true signals of what we are experiencing and learning in this life as long as we keep them from getting stuck and learning how to move them into a healthy state of growth.

Love,
Ana

Healing on a Higher Level

2009-05-28T08:08:00.000-07:00

One of the things that many of us are working on as we move through the human experience is learning how to heal those past rocky relationships that are no longer apart of our lives. I know that with the work that I have been doing this has been one of the quest that I have put upon myself so that I can balance and heal within my own heart.

Often there are relationships that you will experience that making the contact can't be achieved and therefor putting you at a stand still as you are trying to clear that old energy out of your energy field. This makes the work of healing a little different than what we all assume to be the only solution as far as a person to person interaction.

What I have learned and what I have discovered that working on the higher realm is often the option when this blocks the road of healing. This means working with God and the higher self of the person which is the soul of the person you are having conflict with. The best part is that because we are all crated by our Creator that makes us apart of the same family which in turn allows us to be more loving and accepting towards each other on a higher realm.

The energy of the soul has a higher loving energy toward one another, meaning that what the body and mind are doing is not necessarily who we truly are on the soul level. That is why so many people become split when they are going against the true nature of their souls as they follow certain norms here on earth.

It helps to understand that really learning to tap into the loving nature of the soul as we put out trust in God is how we become a lot more comfortable with what is unfolding in our own lives. It also gives a much bigger picture of how the soul is here on earth to learn even as our egos might take control causing havoc in our lives.

So with this in mind we can go into a meditation asking God to come into our personal space and inviting the other person's higher self to come. It is here in the quite and the scared space that we ask God to intervene and allow us to express our sincere love for them and bringing them into our lives to teach us as we grow and learn in this life. We can also ask for forgiveness form both them and ourselves for whatever has passed.

It is also important that we ask God to cover us both with a beautiful light of love and healing energy so that we can go back into our lives with a feeling of wholeness. Then with gratitude we can part and move back to our awareness of this life.

With this done, each time that person enters your mind, you then send them loving and healing thoughts guided their way. Keep them in your prayers and don't worry if you think they wont get it, as it is stamped with their name on it.
That type of mail always gets delivered on time.

Oh and one more thing to remember, is that just because the healing is done on the soul level, it is not about bringing that person in your life again. If that is what is supposed to happen for the highest good, for both you and them, then it will happen. But if it is not, it will be what it is. The thing to remember is that it is about loving the other person and having faith that it is all in God's plan.

1.Forgive, 2.Let go, 3.Trust....... big steps on the road to forgiveness and healing.

Blessings,
Ana

Shifts of Life

2009-05-27T06:15:00.000-07:00

It seems that we all go through major shifts, like changes in our lives, that make improvements in our spiritual growth as we move down the path of life. Sometimes it is a blessing in disguise, even if we claw and hold on to all the door frames as we are being moved from one place to the other.

I for one, always thought I enjoyed the spontaneity of change but lately these movements have been coming in quick blasts each time the wind turns in a new direction. It is a lot like riding a roller coaster and not knowing what is around the next turn or over the next hump. But with each ride there is the sense of a thrill of accomplishment and a feeling of, "that wasn't as bad as I thought," only to find that another ride is about to take flight after getting off the last.

As we learn to center ourselves in all the major shifts going on in our lives and the lives of those we hold most dear, we can take on a new appreciation of learning. Thus, we can experience the events and changes in our lives without the massive amounts of drama that we might have been more susceptible to before we learned to do so. Finding that center within ourselves allows us to move into a place where we can find peace that can give us freedom to experience the unplanned events that life can sometime throw at us.

But with this, there is also a need to find a community that can be trusted, where you can speak your truth without fear, and validate your feelings as you are moving through the creative process of life changing events. It is here, in a small group of friends or healing circle, that you find acceptance of who you are without judgment and are loved because you are in the same life boat and apart of the crew weathering out the same storm.

For all of us, it is about finding acceptance and love without judgment that helps us move on to healing waters. I am so amazed of the wonderful people in my life within the Healing Circles, as we reach out, to each other in growing and learning how to find peace in a community of self acceptance, surrounded by support and love for each other.

Finding the strength as we experince the shifts is learning self acceptance and how to connect, not only with each other, but also finding that peace that is within us all as we move through the changes that life has to offer, knowing we are apart of something much bigger than ourselves.

Namaste,
Ana

The Source

2009-05-22T17:11:00.001-07:00

As I move through my own experience, I find that many including myself are going through or have gone through the change of the soul. We see it all the time even though we might not be aware of it. So often we look for religious experiences where we can have that personal connection and we may find it in the mass of others who have the same quest but what happens when you go home?

What happens when you go back to your family and your job? Do we forget where our personal connection with our Creator began? You hear so much about falling victim of some organization or charismatic person who draws you in and you end up giving up your personal beliefs to follow. It is somewhere along this line that you have lost yourself and your personal power of connecting with our own Spirituality.

Spirituality, is something that we tend to give up so easily as we don't realize how it is so important to connect, so that our souls grow on a higher level of learning. I talk to so many people who are so disappointed as they leave these circumstances disillusioned and a feeling of emotional trauma. Where as many will return to the same situation or move on searching for answers. Some lose their faith all together.

But maybe we have it all wrong as we hand over our precious gift of the care of our own spirituality to others and the organizations. Truth is that the growth of our own spirituality and our souls is out of tending to it everyday and not giving it away. Who is to say what is between you and God. Your own connection to the source is different than anyone in the world.

I have learned from some amazing people and teachers in my life to trust and listen to what is inside myself as I make that connection. As you share what you are learning and if someone suggest something that they feel, always know that your experience is yours and personal which means if it rings true within your spirit, then trust and you will know in your heart what is the real truth. We were all built, with that inner knowing and connection to the true source of God.

I know that meditation is not for everyone as it is hard to quite the mind sometime when you have thirty different things to do but it is a good way to hear what the Creator has to say in the silence. Also, prayers are heard and feeling the positive energy within your own soul can change your life bringing you closer to how you were created. Talking out loud or in your head is another easy way to connect. Love is a big one and one of my favorites for those who like to work in the energy prayers.

There are so many ways to care for our relationship with our Creator without handing the responsibility over to other individuals, it just takes a little practice, faith and love to enjoy this powerful and fulfilling experience of connection with our Creator.

Namaste,
Ana

Powerful in the Present

2009-05-20T16:40:00.000-07:00

By us not swallowing the lie, we create one of the biggest acts of discovering our personal power which is finding our true connection to the Holy Spirit. I know that many have learned the disparate lie at an early age that we are not good enough to measure up to others, as we are taught to compare ourselves in this world.

This lie is only a trick of the ego, trying hard to hold us hostage of our true selves. What we need to remember is that we were created by the Divine. We were created in love which many have long forgotten from where we originally came from, as carry this lie in our hearts.

As we stumble in the dark trying hard to find the light, we often get a flash that leads us to a path where some who have found the spark of light and are offering their light to light the path to awaken the other souls form the darkness.

As we are attracted to the path which is lit up, we find that we can be powerful in our own thoughts and actions if we stay in the present and leave all of our past pain behind. But if we move into the past or try to go on into the future bringing up the pain, then we get lost in the emotional baggage or lost in fear where we must learn to free ourselves.

We, not God or anyone else, creates our own pain in our lives, as we hold the knife to our own necks. If we ask God to release us from this, then we must be willing to drop the knife. If we ask God to release us and we are unwilling to let go of the knife, then we allow our own suffering to continue until we are brought to our knees in surrender. In which case for many of us that is when the Holy Spirit will often intervene. And things in our life began to shift in a whole new meaning and different direction.

Once we again remember, where once we came, through love, as a creation of the Divine. Then remember the lie that we swallowed was only a lie as we began to live.

Blessings, Ana

In the Kingdom of our Fathers

2009-05-20T13:28:00.000-07:00

Once a long time ago, long enough that most of us can't remember, there was a land of great abundance. And in this land, were beings who honoured the sacredness of the self and love. But there came a presence in this beautiful world which we will call a lie and in that lie, brought doubt and fear.

It was within the intent of the lie that things began to fall apart and the beings were starting to lose their glowing light. One by one they swallowed the lie and one by one they relinquished their light. And soon this beautiful kingdom, fell into a darkness where the only light that now shined was now created by the one who wanted the lie to spread.

It was there in that darkness as the beings were wandering around without the hope of light or finding each other in the dark, that one being discovered a spark and within the spark was the abundance of healing and truth, the one part of the true light that survived the the whole ordeal.

Now in this spark there was also a glow. And to look at the glow reminded you of where you came form which offered forgiveness and the true meaning of hope for anyone who saw or touched it.

It was there in the darkness, that a healing occurred and the one being who had first lost their light, began to understand the truth and meaning of love. Within that love there was a connection to God and where it all began. As the being picked up the spark that now started to grow into a larger light and others came to touch the light. The world that was filled with darkness, was now lit up with an enormous light.

As the beings began to see again and remember what they had lost because of the lie. They also understood that the only reason they lost their light is because they believed the lie which gave it power. The true power was understanding it was only a lie and moved on with what they were doing without the constant belief of the lie.

Freedom, form the bondage of darkness was achieved, as the beings learned that lie, is only a lie, nothing else and nothing more.......

In Peace,
Ana

Spritual Awakening

2009-05-20T06:04:00.000-07:00

One of the things that I have learned out of the many bumps and bruises of starting to awaken and learn, is that it is not all smooth sailing. I think many of us have this fantasy of peace that comes when you finely open your eyes and see the light. The truth is that you only began to get small glimpses of it which are enough for you to live in hope, until the next.

You find yourself like a small child wondering what is wrapped up and waiting under the Christmas tree, as each experince brings an amazing event or growth in your life. The only trouble is moving through the full life experience which are there for our personal growth of the soul. This is the hardest part of learning.

I like the idea of us being a piece of clay and the Master is molding us. Each experience whether a loving one or a painful one is the touch of the Master turning us into a masterpiece. Beautiful and unique in our own right, as we are becoming a true work of art.

What most don't understand is that sometimes this hurts, as we are molded and shaped. Even when we are awake during this process of creativity, we can lose ourselves, if we don't put our complete faith in the hands of our Creator.

I think we find that falling off of the shelf and then trying to patch ourselves back together before anyone sees us, is a natural response. But it is through our own surrender that we finely find a little peace, only to find that those cracks can hurt when being smoothed out on the wheel of our Creator.

Just because we have chosen to consciously take the high road to spirituality does not mean that we are immune to cracks that can't hurt us. Some of the most brilliant and spiritual people are still finding the cracks being filled in. We are all as we say, "Human," imperfect and beautiful as we move through our lives.

The work of the soul is this process of learning, love, compassion and faith. It is discovering our fears and releasing our own judgments of ourselves and each other. The painful and loving relationships in our lives are only teaching us how to expand our souls in our own self awareness of learning.

I used to think that people in my life who emotional hurt my ego were out to get me but now I understand that we are all in our own experience and even though we intermingle and affect the other, we are all ultimately learning how to love.

Just recently I had the experience of forgiving myself and someone else of hurting my ego in the past. I decided to move in the act of forgiveness and grace, as I had held this person responsible for my pain. I contacted this person, and got no response which I discovered that I was again shot with the pain of rejection.

But I did come to realize that if my intentions were out of guilt or to find relief in mending the fabric that was torn, then the act of forgiveness was not in line with what I know, should be. I revisited the situation and this time sent love to the person and the past. I released my attachments of this beautiful individual of needing to change or mold this person to my own requirements. The best part, was that I was the one delivered grace.

I know that on a higher level of understanding, we are all created and interwoven of the same fabric with the love that God has infused deep within our soul, in all of us.

My own personal experience here on earth is to learn form the past, sending love to all those who have been and will be apart of my life. It will be a journey of staying conscious of many decisions to come as I am learning to move through an awakening of the spirit.

Namaste,
Ana

Fire of the Spirit

2009-05-20T04:29:00.000-07:00

As I share some of my experiences in life, I have to mention one of the many experiences I had, that pushed me over the edge, on the the path that I am on now. It seems to have started two and a half years ago. I have mentioned before about having experiences that were rather spontaneous happening in and out through out my whole life. Nothing, as strong as the one I wrote about in my blog "Epiphany" but close to it.

Again, these were happening spontaneous and could happen any where or at anytime, while I was driving, setting at my desk or just living life. What happened was that I would start to get a tingling sensation in my body and a feeling of warmth and love would drape over me like a nice fuzzy tingly blanket coming form behind by back. Then an all encompassing feeling of love and acceptance would shoot up my spine almost like fire as it exploded out of my head. A feeling of pure bliss and ecstasy would follow as love felt like it was beaming form every cell in my whole body.

This experience was different than what I described earlier in the "Epiphany" blog as I felt apart of everyone and everything. This was a feeling of love for all those around me. The feeling would last a few minutes and it would slowly wear off the rest of the day.

The funny thing is that I was in an unhealthy situation at my work place and this would happen where I felt love but would start to resort back into the unhealthy behavior patterns as I went back into my environment within days. As I was starting to work on a healing program for my workplace, I decided to take the liberty of following my nose, so to speak.

I decided to try to find what and why this was happening to me. So I began to talk to very close friends, where it was suggested that I start learning meditation, which might help me understand what was going on.

A Continuing Education catalog arrived at our house within a few days of this decision and as I was looking through it, a meditation class stood out. OK, that was easy, I called and enrolled. Feeling a little uncomfortable and like a fish out of water, I sat in my first class out on the side. Our teacher was going to have no part of that and quickly moved us into a circle and started us out by saying our name and why we were there.

As I opened my mouth to say, I was here to see what mediation was all about, the teacher stopped me in mid sentence and said, "so much will change in your life the next nine months and you will not know yourself as you know yourself now." Oh honey, you didn't volunteer to come here, you were dragged here." Then she moved on to the next person, as my sentence was never completed. I wish I could say that all my answers were answered in that class but it was the beginning of a journey of self discovery and spiritual awakening for the last two and a half years.

I might not have the answers you might be looking for but if you are reading this blog then you are on the same path that I am of learning. As we share our experiences and stories, then we come together in a unity of understanding that when the Holy Spirit calls us to grow, the only way to find peace, is to move on that path.

In Love,
Ana

Natural Rhythms of Life

2009-05-18T18:10:00.000-07:00

As we learn to feel the natural rhythms of life all around us, we began to move into a new consciousness. There seems to be a heart beat and awareness of energy which flows in us and though us. This is what is called, subtle energy that affects you even if you are not aware of it.

Everything we know of is made of some type of energy, even the things that we believe are solid. Energy can create low frequency sound, vibration or space that can be picked up by the energy centers located in our own bodies. It is because of this that we are able to become sensitive to the energy around our bodies.

You can use the example of plugging up your ears and feeling the top of the piano as someone plays so you feel the vibration. You don't hear the sound but you feel it. Again this is energy on a stronger level of vibration.

So now lets us say you take your shoes off and walk barefoot in the park. If you stand close to a train track you will feel the train and if you stand close to the road you will feel the cars. But what if you stand in the middle of a field as your energy centers in your body start to feel. Then you began to pick up the energy of the earth and all the things that are apart of it.

Same thing, when you use your higher energy centers and start to meditate or stand still in the quiet. You will feel an energy that comes down from the heavens and moves through top of your head. It may feel a little like waves moving in and through your body or a tingling sensation. I am finding that people feel the energy differently but everyone feels it.

A few years ago I was in Taos, NM and was there working out some relationship issues in my life. I had meet this Medicine Man and he told me that," energy is not good or bad as it comes form the Great Spirit. It is the person and their intentions that create the good or bad as they use it. Energy is only energy as it was created." I remember at the time that made no sense to me. Now, with more of an understanding of how things work, it make perfect sense.

Energy is no more than a tool that can be used and moved with our thoughts and bodies. It is not something to warship or some type of magic. It is the same as cutting down a tree and building a house. It is learning how to move it so that it flows the way it was created to flow in and out of us. In a past blog I discussed how when the energy gets stuck it can cause illness in the body and that by moving can help speed up healing. Again it is the way we are made as it moves through you, in you and even gets stuck whether you are aware of it or not.

We as human beings have forgotten what we once knew, even connecting with our Creator and living in harmony with the energy and things around us. It is time for us to remember and wake up form dreaming.

Namaste,
Ana

Living in Love

2009-05-17T10:19:00.000-07:00

Wow, this is so much fun you must try it! Try to take a little time out for yourself to be alone. When you can find a quite place or put on some soothing music then take the time to quite the mind.

Breath out all tension and stress from the day and breath in the loving energy form our Creator. Just take the time for all negative thoughts and feelings to drain out of you. Then send it on its way into the center of the earth. Ask God to use you as a beautiful vessel to channel his love to others.

Again, allow yourself to fill up with this amazing love form God and just let it fill you up in all the places that you allowed to drain away that negative energy. Fill in all that empty space inside of you with love and expand your heart with love. By doing this, you get this huge feeling that moves within you of love and compassion for yourself and others.

As you do, you may start to have things come up that are negative and remember that it is OK. Just release it and fill yourself with love. People will start to come into your mind and when they do, think of them surrounded with love and send that love to them where ever they are. Ask for healing if it is painful and send that pain away and fill that empty space again with love.

If you do it enough, then you will begin to just think of love and that feeling will just take over your whole being without another thought and you can send loving healing energy form God to others through out your whole day. When you do this, then you are learning to channel a very fine and higher frequency of energy that can only come form God allowing you to heal and become balanced to.

Just try it... You may be surprised. Others will notice a change in you, who are around you. Oh one warning, you might feel, "a little out to lunch" as we say. So if you do and need to come down a little to function the rest of the day instead of being on,"cloud nine", then eat something or drink water just to ground you back into this world.

Have fun with it and enjoy,
Ana

Energy Color

2009-05-17T09:33:00.000-07:00

If you have read my past blogs on energy then you understand that seeing energy has nothing to do with religion. It is not something to worship or be afraid of as it is apart of everything and in everything. Emotionally it is truly a state of being. It is learning how to balance the emotional self with body, mind and spirit.

For those of you, who can see the color around living things then you understand that energy can be transposed by the brain into color as it shows the different moods of individuals. Emotions, come in so many colors and the way people are feeling shows up in the energy field around them. As I talk to people more and more I am finding that everyone has this gift of seeing the colors, only most have forgotten and have left it behind.

Two years ago when I started to remember how to see colors again, I was explaining it to my children. One of my children who is very well grounded said, "Oh, you are talking about the colors of light that surround people." I had no idea that my children could see this or were even aware of it. When we stated to talk, I discovered that they are able to see but have played it off as a trick of the light.

Energy is nothing to be afraid of as it makes up everything in the universe. It is in everything and around everything only most of us are not aware of it as some. As far as color is concerned, people don't realize how beautiful they really are. This has nothing to do with skin color, faith or other, it is about really just being human.

Something fun you can try......

I find myself doing this when I am board or wanting to know the color of my own energy. Find a mirror and look into it. When you do, find your outline and stare at it for a minute. What you will began to see is a whitish light surrounding you. So often this is what most people see only at first and some will even see color at that time. If you are like me, it might take a few times at first but you will eventually see it.

Once you do, then you can play with it, by expanding the light out by thinking of someone you love or feeling good about. Later, you might began to see color. Don't be discouraged if you don't see color right away, it takes some time and once you do it is like riding a bike.

If you are feeling love, then send it to someone you care about. Trust me the energy is there to carry that love to them. If they don't pick it up then I promise their spirit will.

Love, Ana

Epiphany

2009-05-15T05:57:00.000-07:00

I know I can be a little slow at coming to these things as I see others shaking their heads as to, "Now she gets it"! For me you can tell me about it and I can study it but until I experience it, it takes awhile to sink in.

Lately, I have been working hard on learning about ascension and tying to understand exactly what it is. As I learn I find it very close the story of Revelations that is discussed in the Bible only with a view of the more positive side. It is not about death and destruction. But about love and forgiveness so that we prepare ourselves for the ascension in which we will become reunited with our Creator.

Great, this is something I can read without feeling like I am the only one missing out on all the symbols of the story. I found to, that it is not just in our culture that discusses this event but a lot of others who have the same story just viewing it from a different perspective. All you Artist know what I mean.

I have been having these beautiful experience on and off through out my whole life but never understood the true meaning of what it was all about until now as I am starting to put it all together with my teachers, gifted friends and the amazing circles of learning.

Last night, as I laid my head on the pillow and started to go into the dream state, I was reminded of my experience, which I talked about in an earlier blog about this feeling of an all encompassing love that took over my whole being. And when I say being, I mean the mind, body and the soul. This love connected me to everything as we call alive and nonliving. And even though I was in my living room I felt apart of every human, plant, mineral and animal. I knew what everything was thinking and experiencing for that brief moment of time. It was almost so overwhelming as my heart expanded and I started to lose myself in it.

It was fear, that brought me out of it, as I was becoming one with everything and was losing my since of me. Yes, I have always prided myself as being quite the separate individual and free. I had never experienced this feeling of oneness in my life and when I calmed down enough to analysis what just happened I discovered that I liked it! I even felt, I would like to do that again but
this one unique experience has not happened since and that was four years ago.

As I have searched to find the answers to such spontaneous experiences in my life. These amazing people have been coming into my life and teaching me about healing. As I work and learn I find that things in my own life that have caused me pain are finely started to change into lessons of teaching without suffering attached to it.

I discovered to that the very basic teaching is forgiving myself and others in my life that I have held accountable for so much. I have also learned that through the love, that I can now send out to those in my life in the past, present and future that love is once again seeping through and moving me in a direction of healing.

The pain that blinded me in my own experience has now changed to feeling the pain of those who were hurting. Yet, I have discovered that I can now revisit those past experiences and send love and healing to those caught in those events.

I have also learned that by moving through this process of healing that I am pulling more of a higher energy through myself which is what many teachers on this earth through out the ages were talking about. By doing this alinement I am beginning my path of once again, toward the experience of feeling that state of being whole and apart of everything.

There is a saying that, Once you experience first class, then nothing else compares".

With Great Love,
Ana

The Depths of the Soul

2009-05-13T16:48:00.000-07:00

One of the many lessons it seems that I am learning on my spiritual quest is finding that place inside us all that we hide the beauty that the Creator gave to each of us. No, I am not talking about spiritual gifts but that place inside that makes us feel apart of everyone and everything.

This is an amazing part of ourselves that we often deny because of fears or blocks that we have decided to make our own. I know that sounds strange as most of us think we can just let it go but it takes more than that to set this straight, as we navigate through life's path.

This is really about discovering our emotional fears and not moving away but trusting in that very small voice of inner guidance that God has entrusted to each and everyone of us as we move through the storm.

It is about loving that part of you that you are afraid that others will reject but instead seeing yourself through the eyes of our Creator. Discovering that delicate weave that has been tailored as you and only you, who with love can change the world out of the compassion of moving through the depths of your fears which brings people together.

That beauty lives in all of us and the time is coming to set it free, as it is in our make up and in our surrender of letting go.

Namaste,
Ana

The Ties That Bind

2009-04-13T10:44:00.000-07:00

Amazing, how we can go through life and not know how to intimately connect with ourselves and others. We are completely left at the mercy of our own ignorance. Who teaches this stuff? Where do we go to learn the very basics of connecting with each other and life?

Often times we go to our religious leaders and professionals to learn this but I find that many of them as they move through the motions are only learning about it themselves. So where do we go to fill in the gaps as we find ourselves falling in between the cracks?

As I search I have personally come to understand that many of us are on the path of seeking answers and asking questions. It is by asking questions that we began to sift through the many answers to find the truth that bears meaning to explain what we are experiencing and feeling.

I guess for many of us it is first overcoming our fear of learning the basics of tools that allow us to grow and cultivate ourselves. It is also through our learning and sharing with each other our amazing experiences and stories that bring an encouragement which allows others to find comfort in our trials and tribulations while sharing this earth.

It is with the great intent of love for each other that we break our ties that bind us from our fears so we may move on to greener pastures. This allows an opportunity of growth as we discover new possibilities in expanding our awareness of being.

So often we dismiss our inner voice or have it tuned out as we move forward down the path of our life journey. We forget about what it is like to feel our very own spirit and know the love and energy that surrounds us.

It is the fear that binds us and keeps us tide up from acknowledging our own inner experiences of learning. The fear of being different or strange only stops us from connecting to a higher sense of self and our higher source.

Yet, what if we cut these ties releasing our inner fears and allowing ourselves to express ourselves, as the true gifts of the spirit moves within us? What if we learn how to move on this earth without the pain and suffering that we impose on ourselves and others? Does this mean that we will have to change how we live? And to what extent does it change our lives while infecting those around us?

Each of us seem to have a purpose as we affect each other's lives with both positive and negative waves of our state of being. So here is the test. What is the tie that binds you?

Love,
Ana

The Human Condition

2009-04-13T07:41:00.000-07:00

Now, I have done a lot of talking in my past writings about energy and working with others but now lets put the focus a little more on the home front. I call it the human condition which means that we forgot what it is like to feel our own energy and spirit.

A few years ago I was working with a wonderful teacher in Austin and he said, "that most of us have it all wrong because we have it backwards and that really we are all Spiritual beings having a human experience". " Not human beings having a spiritual experience". Of course at the time I couldn't get out of my own way to understand that.

How could that be when everything I saw and touched was so solid and real? That teacher must be nuts I remember saying as I was trying to get in touch with my true self. So like all things that I don't understand, I filed it away for a future analysis when I had more time and moved on.

I have learned since then that all things will be reviled when the student is ready so it wasn't until a year and a half later when I was working with a meditation, I had learned to feel the spirit within that I discovered the truth for myself. Doubting Thomas and I seem to share the same symptoms for the human condition.

The whole experience was quite breath taking as I could go into this beautiful mediation and began to feel my own energy. At first it was a little scary as I knew only how to pick up the energy of others but this was truly amazing to feel first hand what your own spirit feels like living in your own body.

I know it sounds weird or off the wall as your brain tries to process it but when you actual experience and become aware of your own inner being something changes inside of you. Suddenly those teacher's words were brought back to life with a light bulb attached to it.

I find it no coincidence that I started working on that particular meditation in early January as I lost my father, cousin and my 19 year old cat in mid February.
The losses were unexpected and devastating as my family and I suffered one loss after another within a weeks time.

It was somewhere in the middle of this week that I remembered the meditation and started to practice it and I was able to find a peace as I began to connect the dots between the body and the spirit once again understanding that the body is only a garment that we wear and shed when it is time to move on.

A few weeks later as a family, we were able to visit my father's grave as he died and was buried on a private ranch out in Presidio TX. I was able to walk around and feel the energy of the land where he died. I also was very aware of my own spirit, light and free yet living inside of me. It was there, as I started to feel connected that a feeling of peace rushed over me and I began to remember who I really am. I could also see how each and everyone of us are connected on this earth and in the next, as it brings a unity and healing of the self.

The loss and grief began to seep into the ground and a since of freedom of becoming the Spirit energy that we truly are overwhelmed me. As we left my Father's friends and the land, I remembered once again that my father who was a teacher in the ways of the Spirit and I had laughed at him as crazy had once again taught me a another lesson in healing.

Blessings,
Ana

A Common Thread

2009-04-09T06:46:00.001-07:00

One of the things that seems to be a common thread which people should know about, is how much influence that energy can have on individuals and the people they come in contact with. I know it took me awhile to see and understand this myself but when I started to work with energy and healing I really started to notice how much it affects our lives.

This past week I was working with a client on balancing her energy as she had been nursing a cold and was not feeling well. We had to stop a few times to let her blow her nose. In the middle of the session my nose started to run and I had to stop and blow mine. I was fine when we started but now I was being a little distracted by my nose.

It downed on me that I was working very closely with her energy field and I was taking on her systems. This meant that I needed to acknowledge it and then send it on it's merry way.

Later that day I was working with another client when I noticed a few minutes into the session that my stomach was hurting. Not bad but uncomfortable, so I asked my client if she was having a stomachache. She immediately responded that her stomach was hurting all that morning and so I started to work on releasing the energy and clearing out the pain from both of our energy fields. It worked within the next few minutes the pain was gone which I quickly checked with my client and hers was gone to.

Later that night after attending a Bible study I was riding with a friend who needed to pick up her daughter from her ballet class. When her daughter got in the car she said her foot was hurting and asked for me to lay my hands on it and help with the pain. I did and after a little while my foot started to hurt which made me speak up and tell her what I was feeling in my own foot. She smiled and asked exactly where on the foot was I feeling the pain.

That was easy as I could pin point to exactly where the area of pain on her foot was coming from as mine was hurting to. She smiled really big and said that, yes, that was where it was causing her pain. I started to work again in clearing out the pain that was in her energy so that we would both felt better.

It wasn't until the next day that I was thinking about my husband who sympathized with both my pregnancy and the births of our two children. As I was having contractions, he would feel the pain in his stomach. I must confess at the time, I was not very compassionate towards his pain. But now 17 years later I am still in "aw" how we can pick up emotions, feeling and even pain from each other when we are close.

I have discovered that we don't even have to be in the same room or even in the next but can be miles and miles away and still be connected to each other.

I used to have a very good friend and every time I felt that person think of me I would note the time and day. This was when I was traveling a lot. The funny thing is that friend would always let me know when they were praying for me or was just thinking about me and always confirmed what I noted to the exact time.

I realized then, was what the amazing power and effect that our thoughts and prayers have on each other. Now more than ever it is important to send out loving and healing thoughts towards each other. Especially towards those who make us crazy. They are the ones who need it the most.

The other thing to be aware of is that often when we are hurt and angry we send out bad thoughts that can truly hurt someone else. I am not saying not to get angry and release your anger but to watch out to who and where you direct your anger and intentions toward as it is like pointing a loaded gun. We are all responsible for the things that we think as much as the things that we do.

Just something to ponder and chew on.....

Love,
Ana

The Bigger Picture

2009-04-08T07:30:00.000-07:00

Moving on to the path of light and shedding the darkness has been a life's work, I think for all of us. I sometimes wonder where we would all be without the experience that we have to share with each other. I know in my own life I take great comfort when I can sit and visit with someone who has been down the same road as I am starting my own journey.

Reaching out to each other in a time of need is only the beginning of sharing what we have to offer each other. Becoming aware of the beautiful light that surrounds others when we are in the company of someone else brings a passion into our own lives. It also allows us to see the beauty in this world.

Like all the people we are so wonderfully inter woven together in this life. That through it all, even in the heartaches we are here to be together as we live and grow in our experiences with each other.

Sometimes seeing the bigger picture for our lives and relationships is not seeing it from our own perspective. It might not be seeing from someone else's either. It is from seeing with the eyes of something much bigger than what we know. And coming to understand that, changes the way we see ourselves and others.

It was someone who is now a dear friend, who pointed that out to me. It was much like a Rubex cube as the combination changes and the pattern begins to fall into place. This is what explains the matrix of relationships and the way we communicate with each other as it becomes a life of understanding and forgiveness.

It is by grasping even a small part of the bigger picture that allows us to experience something much greater then ourselves as we lift each other up.

Blessings,
Ana

The Energy Exchange

2009-04-05T03:19:00.000-07:00

Like the free world money exchange we also exchange energy as freely as we hand money to one another. The only difference is that we often don't see it as it is not as tangible as a dollar bill.

But like money we often find ourselves in great debt as we are not brought up to understand how to balance and handle our personal energy. I find it rather interesting that we don't teach our children how to handle energy in school but we also don't teach them how to handle money either.

So where does that leave us? In great debt. We find that often our personal relationships take up so much of our time and energy that we can be exhausted by the end or even the beginning of the day.

Personal freedom, is discovering and understanding that we do have this energy exchange going on all the time and anytime we are with someone. This is where we learn about ourselves and our own personal power. Understanding the exchange rate in energy terms changes the dynamics on how we manage our lives and care for others.

I remember a few years ago when I first became aware of this, as it had all became very apparent by working closely with the different personalities on the staff that I was apart of.

At the time I had made an acquaintance who was a Councilor and I mentioned that I could feel people's energy when I walked into a room. I had also discovered that I could physically move energy but was not really sure what it was all about. The commit that was made was that they were not sure what religion I was but some churches excepted that. I stopped in mid sentence as I realized that there was nothing else to say as the energy I was experiencing had nothing to do with what faith I was.

Energy is very simple, as I have now come to know that it can be felt by everyone. The whole key is to understand how it works as we go about our daily activities with each other giving and taking it without realizing what we are doing. You see, it is how we are created which comes naturally in the way we interact with each other.

We are preprogrammed so to speak, the only difference is if we were programed to interact in a healthy way or not. A lot has to do in with our emotional environment as we were growing up. Yes, emotions are pure energy. Nothing like having a reaction to someone or something to get the heart racing and the blood pumping both in a positive or a negative way.

What people don't see is very real. Again, this has nothing to do with your religious background but has everything to do with being human. So there we are exchanging our emotional energy with each other without taking the energy exchange course 101.

No wonder so many of us wonder what in the world happened with some of our relationships. Think about this..... a person who is very angry is demanding attention and unconsciously taking energy form someone else. They are intimidating, draining and stealing energy form the other person to make themselves feel OK or stronger. On the other side when you have an argument the loser will often feel defeated, drained or hurt in the emotional battle.

Have you ever met someone with the "poor me" attitude? And I don't mean someone who is really down on their luck but someone who milks life to get your attention. When you meet someone like this, as a compassionate person you may feel like you want to help them. In which you find yourself giving energy and parts of yourself trying to make things right for them. They are happy and fulfilled and you leave feeling used and drained.

What about the person who is not wanting to interact? This personality gains energy form others as they make others seek them out and expend their energy trying to draw them out. When the other person realizes the amount of energy they are spending they might stop, in which case will often bring the person not wanting to interact to refocus on the relationship. And why wouldn't they? As my ex boss used to say," they were getting their well filled."

The intimidater is one that I really don't like to be around. This person uses power and demands in taking another person's energy. You will find that this personality will often be a "wolf in sheep's clothing" and when you least expect it, they come out of their disguise bearing teeth. When you finish dealing with someone of this nature you feel drained and exhausted of trying to keep the energy that they are demanding.

It is important to know that even if you recognize one of these patterns in yourself and have done major work on healing that by being in an environment that has unhealthy boundaries and unhealthy energy, you may revert back to your old habits out of the need for survival. This is a "red flag" going off telling you to get out of the unhealthy environment and work on yourself so that you don't begin to drain others.

One more thing I would like to mention is that the opposite of taking energy is giving it. Love is a big one in offering a beautiful exchange of energy and giving positive emotional support to someone. Love is healing which can change lives and relationships around you.

The only difference is that it is up to you to know when it is time to move out of an unhealthy situation or hold on. Just know that you are not crazy when you feel drained and weak. Know to that when you feel well balanced and full of love that you are in a healthy emotional relationship . The choice is yours. I guess that is why they call it," free will".......

Namaste,
Ana

Speaking in Love

2009-04-02T07:44:00.000-07:00

One of the things that seems to keep coming up these past few weeks is," speaking in love." I don' t think we give much thought about it as we go along in our very busy lives. I noticed a few times I have been very aware of what was going on around me as I realized that the small act of loving someone even when I had the urge to be upset seemed to change the whole dynamics of the relationship. It can be like adding cool water to an open wound.

I think that by being conscious of ourselves when we feel we are in the right is to know that it only brings in a negative energy that can destroy another's self esteem. Our beautiful relationships with each other are too preciouses to lose to such a fate. In the end, it is the act of love that moves mountains and removes the road blocks.

Anger destroys our inner peace with ourselves and others. Notice this when you are driving, that is when this really comes out for some. It is by speaking in love that not only can change our relationships in verbal communication but also leaks out in our actions with each other.

I know when I am on the other side and someone is frustrated with me, I am also frustrated with myself, them and the situation to. It makes it so much easier to have someone who offers grace and a kind word of understanding instead of criticizing and anger.

A word in love or even laughter changes the situation from something devastating to something very human which plants seeds in all of us for becoming loving towards each other. I know that we are in the mindset of being not able to make mistakes and rise above others but when we do, we take the humanity out of being human.

It is OK to make mistakes and it is OK to find solutions on how to fix them together with encouragement. As we grow in a loving maturity we learn to make allowances for each other and we also find the comfort of touching another life and our selves by the power of our loving words and actions.

One of my teachers once told me, "Ana, when you facilitate healing for someone else, you are also experiencing a healing in yourself. It is how we are created to share in the whole experince as we walk on this earth together."

Love, Ana

A Lesson of War

2009-03-01T06:15:00.000-08:00

Two weeks ago in one of my dreams, I was shown the book, "The Art of War," so imagine my surprise when I was dropping books off at the library and discovered, on the audio shelf, the CD of this book. Of course I had to check it out and was aware that I was moving in unmarked territory, in a subject that I really had no interest in, so I thought.

As I got into the car I removed the CD's and fed them into my CD player I wondered again why I was listening to this. I often do a lot of driving, and listening to audio books takes the edge off of the long trips. As I listened to the historical history of the Warlords in China, I began to think, why in the world would I check out something so boring? My mind soon began to wonder as I drove but something in the back of my mind said, "just wait".

Out of the five CD's, it wasn't until I got to the middle of the second CD that a story began to catch my attention. It was about an Emperor who wanted to do a little experiment and asked a Warlord If the same tactics to train men could be used to train women. He then gave the Warlord 180 beautiful women to be trained in the art of war. The Warlord agreed as the times were desperate.

The Warlord took the Emperor's two favorite Concubines and made them Commanders. Then he outfitted them all in combat clothes and gave them weapons to fight with. After asking the women if they knew certain things about war and combat, he lined all of them together in rows and placed the two Commanders up front in charge of the group.

Next he went into an explanation of exercises and gave them directions of commands. Once he did this, he shouted out a command to face the north with weapons drawn. The ladies began to giggle and no one turned to that direction of the command. He promptly explained that it was the Commanders who were in charge and it was their duty to explain and make sure that everyone understood the commands.

To cut the story short this same scenario played out for four more times which he promptly announced that since it was the Commander's responsibility to create a harmonious team. He then ordered the two Commander's to be executed. As the Emperor saw this about to take place he sent out a prompt message, not to do this since he would lose the " pleasure of tasting his food" as I quote directly from the book.

But the Warlord responded that the Commanders had taken the office of command and responsibility and ordered the execution in front of the ladies. As the ladies looked on to such a severe display of punishment, two Senior ladies were appointed to be Commanders to take the place of the ones that were executed.

Again the Warlord lined the ladies up and went over the directions and then proceeded to shout out the commands. This time it was perfect. The women turned to the direction and followed commands in perfect unison. The new Commanders picked up on the form of leadership and provided a new order in transformation of the ladies to a well disciplined army of troops.

I sat there in the driveway, in my car, listening to the story, shocked and amazed of what I just heard. Not only was the story appalling to me but it was true. As I turned it over in my mind, I realized why this story, out of many had caught my attention, I realized that the one thing that I could identify was that when we are in the world we must be aware of our own actions and not be seduced by favoritism.

What I did see......... is that we as humans compete to be the favorite as it gives us privileges and pardons. It is because of this, that it creates a lot of fighting and competition among the leaders of organizations which in turn trickled down to the rest. This type of leadership and atmosphere becames unbalanced in the unison and flow of the one goal that we were all trying to achieve. It is then the outcome of competing to be in the inner circle which was not what leadership is all about.

While I don't agree in execution as a form of discipline to achieve this goal in TEAM work. I did see the value in taking the things that I am working on in my life, with my full attention. I am amazed that the warlords who lived thousands of years ago had this knowledge and it can still be applied to the disciplines of the self and leadership of today.

Blessings,
Ana

Notes on an Empath

2009-02-26T04:53:00.000-08:00

What is an empath? It is a person who shares great empathy with someone, something, or someplace. To me it is a little like being autistic, as the emotional and energy around people floods the senses of the person taking it all in. It can be quite overwhelming and emotional de stabling to those who are uninformed on what it is.

Being an empath is something that many people share in common and if properly informed and trained they can become very successful in the professional world. A person who uses these skills and knowledge can be quite good at reading others and the situations around them. The business world can be a whole different ball game as these talented individual use their skills. You will also find that they are are highly sought out in high profile jury selections.

Children who are exposed to highly unstable home situations develop this skill as a survival technique. These children learn quickly how to read their environment and people around them to see if it is a safe place for them to be in.

While still there are others who are just born with the door wide open and if they grow up in a family who does not understand what the child is going through, may most likely label them as highly sensitive. Gifted? You got that right, you may be dealing with a very gifted child who has the ability to read others and environments like an open book.

So often children and adults are misdiagnosed who are put on drugs and given therapy that only mask a true talent of their soul. Often these highly skilled people will turn to alcohol, television, and other forms of addiction to mute the fine tuned signals that they are receiving.

Like all gifts it is good to be exposed and trained on how to use these talents by someone who understands and can help explain what is happening. It can be an overwhelming experience if the individual can not separate their true feelings from what they pick up from others and the space around them. When I say space, I mean that energy can be held in an environment where trauma or something that has happened that stirs up the peace.

Think about it, haven't you had the experience of walking into a boardroom or a room where your senses go up and you know something has happened there? Or you may have walked into your home where your parents were fighting and you thought to yourself that something is wrong? Well then multiply that times ten and you know what it is like to be an empath.

We all agree that we are multi sensory but what do we truly know beyond our hearing, seeing, smelling, tasting, and touching? What is it about this gift of the senses that we are afraid of?

So often we contribute these behaviors as being someone who is manic depressive, but that can be measured and eliminated on a scale of testing. So that means these highly gifted individuals are often misunderstood because the rest of us are not as developed. It is we who are handicapped, as we can not see into the world past our own five senses.

Blessings,
Ana

In the Mouth of Fire

2009-02-22T04:22:00.000-08:00

A new awareness and awakening that is starting to attract a lot of attention, is in the heart of control, where there are symptoms that lead to strong roots of abandonment. It is something I think that we as a society have not really looked at as a virus that spreads like a forest fire through the fertile grounds all around us.

Often you will see it in the fight for control and power. And people who are sensitive are attracted to it like a moth to a flame. There are two main players in this game, the Abandoner and the Abandoned. A person exposed to one will often act out the other and will exhibit traits of both. But they are the key to creating unbalance and major control issues that lead to unhealthy relationships and that come into contact with the two as they fight for power and control.

As spectators, it is almost seems like attending a Gladator game, as the two forces come together as they go into a power play in the fine arts of war and seduction. Cleopatra would only be so proud. For the two players the game is a true battle of life and death and to others is only a display of bad behavior.

What truly miffs me is that we see it displayed on TV as favorite pass time games that we root for our favorite fighters as if it was something to be proud of. Our thirst for blood only dictates and encourages the fight as we enjoy watching the behavior, redeeming the winner as a strong spirited individual. And yet in reality when we are in the center of the battle we will often run for cover or chose sides hoping that our choice in a hero will be the winner as to share in the spoils of war.

I was amazed that even though we as a society teach our children not to be caught up in these events that we as adults participate and encourage this pattern of ill behavior. You see it everywhere and is considered to be "just the way people are". "Accept it and move on," as I was told by Coworker, where I worked. People are people.....

But in my search for the root of the cause of this behavior, I have discovered that Abandonment can play a big part in creating these unhealthy environments. It is something that most of us live with and may not even be aware that it exists. It is out of our patterns of brokenness that these behaviors show up and destroy lives and all those who showed up for battle.

You may often hear the phrase that "history often repeats its self". Well get out he history books and lets start looking up some of the symptoms. You may think that it was only in the past when you had to sleep with a loaded gun under your pillow but honey tread lightly when you walk into a room and turn on a light.

One of the books that I recommend is "The Journey of Abandonment to Healing" by Susan Anderson if you are looking for material to read to help shed light on the situation.

I will talk more about it in later insights but just wanted to bring to the table how we dress up our most wounded in armor and set them up for the battle field. Nothing has changed in the past thousands of years and it is time to stop this insanity and reach out to each other. After all we are all the creations and children of something much more greater then ourselves.

Peace,
Ana

Retrieval of the Soul

2009-02-21T16:35:00.000-08:00

The first time I mentioned Soul Retrieval to my Pastor, who was my boss at the time, who I thought I did a good job of trying very hard to compose himself as we walked down the hall that connected our offices as I poured out my heart. I was far to ignorant to give him a full explanation at the time but felt that I had been called in that direction. He was really big on being called by the Spirit but I am afraid that what I had just blurted out as a full confession was far too much for him at the time.

I had been guided and studying healing with the intention of finding a solution that not only brought spirituality back into the church but also allowed people to reconnect with themselves and the Holy Spirit. As I talked to people I became aware that we as human beings. Are often too busy to explore our spirituality and find ourselves becoming stuck when we are facing some of the realities in our own lives. I found myself guilty as charged.....

I am not saying that everyone is in this state but a good amount of us are which results in bad relationships, sickness,and sadness as we move through trying to figure out what went wrong. It was when I was given the assignment to go ahead a look for a solution that I came across Soul Retrieval. It was unfortunate for my Pastor to not know that I had been exposed to the "Warriors Way" of healing as a small child by my father when I started to search.

It was something that I had tucked away as insignificant knowledge in my mind as the teachings of someone who knew nothing of the true world. Little did I know that my journey would bring me back home and what I had learned those many years ago as I sat around the fires in the tepee during the summers and listened to my father's stories.

They were just stories to pass the time as I told myself. So why now thirty years later were people teaching the old way of healing? Why was it when I was searching myself for relief of painful relationships was I attracted to what I thought was just the imagination going wild. You see my dilemm.

But determination to find the answer was my influence and I continued on with my path. It lead me to an experience that changed my life and showed me once again that maybe my father had not been a certified nut case after all. All of his teaching had suddenly became a realization that maybe there was truth to what I was experiencing with my own spiritual experiences.

Funny, how we run away from who we really are and if we stopped and just listened, life would be so much in tune to what we were crated for. As I listened to our teacher I realized that all soul retrieval was about was finding the pieces that we lost when we give away our own personal power or taken by someone else. It was very logical and made since to my left brain that tends to sort and organize. This was what my father had taught years ago.

Soul retrieval is about post traumatic stress disorder and teaches in finding the way to retrieve the parts that were lost in a major trauma. This of course could be in a server accident, abuse, loss, abandonment, war, violence, operation, relationship or other trauma where the soul detaches itself from the body and goes to a safe place. Only apart of the soul may not return because it does not realize that the trauma is over. The person experiences not feeling complete and a loss of self. Often they will revisit the trauma over and over in their mind trying to fix it or find the piece that they are missing.

Soul retrieval is an ancient way of relocating the piece of the soul that was lost and returning it to the person who lost it. It also involves working with the person and helping them work with and through the memories of the trauma. It is considered very serious work and takes major training.

As I moved through the training and learning experience I realized that the new and the old were really the same only one was excepted in our society and the other was feared. The ancients were not really far off when they were working with healing and bringing the soul, body and mind together in balance.

To be honest it was an amazing experience. I wish I had gotten the chance to tell my dad that what he taught long ago was not bogus but something that really changes lives and heals. But for some reason I understand that he already knows as he crossed over to the other side this last Sunday.

Ana

Spirit Walking

2009-02-20T06:04:00.000-08:00

Spirit Walking, something I learned from my father who just recently passed away when I was very young and only now have come full circle back to the roots of my past. What is Spirit Walking, you ask? Why it is when you are aware of the completeness of your own being.

Years ago as a very young girl, I walked away from the teachings of my father as I decided to go and fit in with the rest of the world. As I left my past behind to go to the university and discover what life was all about, I began to forget all the teachings that I was once held so closely in my heart.

I am not saying that this was a bad experience as I learned to become apart of the world and started a family which is a huge blessing in my life. But somewhere deep inside me there was a dark hole as though a piece was missing that always seemed to haunt me as I searched for the truth and the meaning of my life.

I tried the depths of organized religion but only found the politics and the painful side of human nature in myself and others as we tried to fit God very neatly in a tight little box. There wasn't enough room for God much less his son or spirit to even close the lid. But through the whole process I began to ever so slightly see a glimpses of the other side and as I did teachers began to show up in my life reminding me of what was once recorded in my heart.

As I am learning and having more experiences, I find that reconnecting with our Creator and who we are in spirit is something that can truly be defined. A few times when I was working at the church I became aware of having this amazing tingling sensation that moved all through me and it was later that a teacher described the sensation of being able to feel the spirit that lives inside. I remember laughing and saying you sound like my crazy dad.

But the experiences wouldn't stop and it would happen spontaneously as I was working in the kitchen or putting together fellowship events where the whole congregation would gather in celebration. The funny part is that if I stood still I felt like I would fall asleep as the warmth and sensation would move like a Swedish massage inside and outside my entire body.

The Pastor of our church at the time, used to ask me why I kept moving and what I was running from by staying so active. He had no idea what I was running form and how do you explain to someone you are having a spiritual experience when you don't even realize you are having one? It was later when I became the Healing Director, as I know that God truly has a since of humor that I began to slow down and search for the unrest inside myself.

My excuses of being busy and politics tried to keep me from coming full circle to where I started from, my past. Sometimes I think that we have the answers all along but refuse or reject them as we are afraid to grow through our own experiences. This is where true intervention comes in.

Only recently with the help of the Holy Spirit am I able to go into meditation and call on my spirit that lives inside me and feel myself as true spirit. The sensation of tingling and lightness moves again through me as my brain seems to be able to register the difference between body and soul. I am now conscious of the coexistence of both, separate but the same as it inhabits the same space I call myself.

You might think this is the best kept secret of our times but we are all capable of doing this and feeling this once we recognize ourselves as true spirit beings in a human body. We are spirit walking when we sleep, you are just not aware of it.

When you think about it in the terms of dieing, it is really about returning to what we already know and where we came from when we move back to the arms of our Creator and that is in the form of our true selves.

Blessings,
Ana

Word for Word

2009-02-16T05:45:00.000-08:00

The day before Valentine's day I sent an email to my Mom. I had misspelled the heading and since I am dyslexic that was something in my normal range of writing. It was fortunate for me that she had come over to visit and had brought her laptop so when she opened the email she asked about it. The word Site had been changed to Stie.

I had to look at it and realized that it was a dyslexic thing and we started to laugh. This started me to thinking as I had been reading about how all the old text were copied by hand before the printing press was invented and that most of the oldest text copies could be subject to manual error. This could be form a mistake of the hand or misinterpretation since a lot of the oldest books were from Europe and were translated to meet the audience of that time.

I had also learned that and it makes since that most of the world, only a few hundred years ago were illiterate. Education and reading were not as it is today in our everyday existence. Because of my own dyslexia I got an Education degree in reading to help me understand it.

What really fascinates me is that we take things for granted that our books are copied exactly the same so in mass production if there is an error in th copy then it is in millions of copies. Everyone gets the same copy "word for word". You can go to one book store and read the same book over and over without skipping a beat.

But what about the older text that were translated by a town scribe that did not have a college education or a degree in Language? Yes, there were educated monks but what about how the text could be changed by the translation of one language to another. What happens if someone who is translating an ancient text and has their own insight of something and changes the words ever so slightly to meet the meaning of the person copying the text?

An example would be like, when I attended a sermon as the quote form Jesus was used,"that you should render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's and render unto God that which is God's. This was followed by that we should be tithing to the church. Maybe that is what it is supposed to be but my take is that Caesar's things are of this earth and God's is of the spirit. My own belief and personal feelings seem to step in the way of what I was being told. So my own judgment stands in the way of translation.......

This makes me wonder that the things that we take for granted are not the things that the old world could take for granted and yet we fight over old text and differences. We all seem to agree that man is quite capable of being imperfect. So by taking a text word for word that has been copied for thousands of years are we not saying that man is infallible and that perfection is achieved?

As a dyslexic I see how a single word can change a single meaning. Just imagining if a massager was to take a message to a fellow kingdom form a dyslexic scribe....

Just something to think about.....

Ana

The Hamburger Theory

2009-02-12T07:33:00.000-08:00

I used to have a friend who liked to tell me that they thought that people were really strange. I didn't understand until he told me about the hamburger theory. What is the hamburger theory you ask? Well, you might be surprised because we hear it all the time.

It kind of goes like this....... You are talking to someone and they tell you that they hate hamburgers and if they saw or smelled a burger then they would be sick. Then you for some reason you ask them if they would like to go to lunch and they say..... Yes! So next you ask where they would like to go since you realize they have strong ideas about food. They suggest this little hamburger place that is around the corner where they make the best hamburgers.......

OK, this might make you think.....Hmmmmm...... Something is not right......and you are right. What you have just experienced is being in the hamburger theory. You are confused and well right you should be..... because what you are hearing is not adding up..... It is a sign of the soul being separate from the body and mind.....

The person is split in half.... One side wants a hamburger and the other side hates them. {Soul separation}is the term and the theory is a signal for help. Now here is the hard part, most of the time the person is not even aware that they are split in two. So telling them that they are crazy is not going to win you any point or make you popular in the relationship.

Also know that there is something they might need to deal with and could be detrimental if you see it and bring it up out of the blue. So where does that leave you?

I have a good friend who mission in life is to remind people that friends speak in love not anger or hate. So when you are with someone and you notice the discrepancy it is better to speak in love and repeat what they are saying to you and ask them again which they prefer. They may even be confused by you doing this because they are completely unaware of their actions.

Just repeat it in love and go on like it is not an issue. This will allow them to hear themselves and later they can then analysis it when they are ready to deal with it. If you notice that someone is doing this for you then you have something to think about.

So now when you hear the hamburger theory, you now know you are not crazy and neither is your loved one. Just know that it is the way the soul calls for help.....

Blessings, Ana

The Silver Thread

2009-02-12T04:48:00.000-08:00

Legend has it that a single silver thread is attached to our body and connects us to our soul. That is why when we are asleep we can walk in the world of our dreams without getting lost. It is how we find our way back to our own body instead of someone else's.

To be honest, when I heard this, I thought it was a nice thought and put it aside for a rainy day. I like to have beautiful thoughts when I am off working on something or finding time alone to think, so it was very natural to file this away in my mind for a later date.

It wasn't until a few weeks ago when I had my own experience did I bring this back up and see a connection of how things worked. I had gone somewhere and was visiting with someone when the feeling of huge disappointment overwhelmed me.

The odd thing was that my mind was totally in agreement with the person I was talking to and even to the point of understanding the reasoning as my own logic. But this emotion of disappointment seemed to take over the very actions of my body. I suddenly became aware of my eyes dropping downward and my mouth turning under a little.

Even with my awareness focused in trying to change my facial and body features to mask my feelings, the emotion of hurt was invading my body. It was a crazy feeling of mixed reactions. I quickly excused myself so that I could pull myself back together.

Driving home I quickly called my husband Steve and related what had happened to me. He tried to think it out in his logical way but could not provide any relief for my state. When I got home I tried to ignore the feeling of emotion that had now consumed my body but couldn't. Next I made a quick phone call to my Mom and explained the situation and told her about the emotion that had taken up residence inside of me.

All she said and it seems so silly now but was so effective. " Ana, you are human and you are allowed to have those feelings." With my acknowledgment of this
statement, I felt like someone had pulled a plug out of the bottom of my feet and the feeling of emotion seemed to drain out starting from the top of my head down though the feet.

Relief and a feeling of peace swept over my body and whole being. I was again aligned. I quickly thanked my Mom and hung up. Now the whole experience lasted from beginning to end of approximately two hours but two very long hours for me. Of course I started to immediately analyze the whole situation in my head of what had really happened to me.

My conclusion was, since I was able to stay conscious of the whole situation during that ordeal that somewhere my soul had separated from my mind and body. I had become split in the experience. The next thing since there was no evidenced of trauma was to find what had caused a trigger to go off causing the split.

After hours of contemplating on this, I gave up since I could find no reason to cause this both in this time frame or my past. It was when I had to rush out the door to pick up my son that my mind found the answer. There in the depths of my mind somewhere locked in a file, a memory began to play out as I was backing out of the driveway.

I was caught so off guard that I stopped in the middle of the street as I put two and two together. While the situation of the day had no real bearing of the past
the one word that stuck in my mind could very well be attributed to the pain that I had felt in the past. It was amazing how powerful that the slighted hint of this could bring on that separation. Wow, as I sat there I honored myself for the feeling of loss and made a conscious decision to be more aware of this so that I would not be separated quite so easily again with this issue.

The whole process brought me back into the awareness that we can be separated from ourselves if we are not conscious of who we are inside. Again the feeling of "Aw" filled me up as I realized how amazing and complex we are as humans in the way we are created.

In Love,
Ana

The Poisoned Apple

2009-02-02T08:22:00.000-08:00

How many of us grew up seeing "Snow White" ? Then the concept of the old witch giving the princess a poisoned apple is not new. I remembered when I was was 6 years old and saw the movie I cried because I thought that the young princess died.

Of course it was later in the movie when we see she is placed in a glass coffin that we realize that death did not come to her, only sleep. We see to that what awaits is the handsome prince and the whole kingdom is happy.

It seems that last week and especially this weekend I have been on a journey and it was discovering what lies inside myself. I have discovered by meeting and talking to others that we each have a sleeping soul inside ourselves that is waiting to be awakened to discovering that we are far more than flesh and bone.

I find too, that we each carry apart of ourselves offering us a poisoned apple that contaminates our personal freedom by sabotaging our emotions and our lives. Many of us know this by the name of the ego. Yes, the ego is the apple that we all seem to bite into and find that it hurts not only us but the people around us.

The more that we are aware of this, then we will find that our past has conditioned us to believe that when we are in fear we become defensive. Doesn't sound so bad but when we add two and two together you find that mostly this means other emotions are added to the whole equation. Sound complected? It is and I am sure you have heard of the term of "peeling an onion". Which means that there are layers and layers that need to be opened and dragged into the light.

The poisoned apple theory can go as far as poisoning an ear. Our intentions may be good as to warn others not to get stuck in someone's else's mess but if our own issues are not taken care of, then we may do our own projection or even unload some of our personal baggage. This will only inflame the situation or cause damage to another.

Of course this does not promote healing for us or the situation that may need to be handled in a loving way. And the emotions of anger or guilt will follow which only add to the mind dialog that can be an emotional trauma to ourselves, kind of like salt poured into an open wound.

Therefor, it is important for us to take some time out to heal and reevaluate where we are and how our own past might infect a situation or relationship. It is a good time to look within, bringing care to those places that were hurt. Self care is so important and we wonder why we are so prone to diseases and emotional trauma in our lives.

We don't give ourselves time to heal. We don't balance our bodies, mind and souls along with emotions. So our fears only becomes transfered to others without us even realizing that we are in pain. Taking the time off to do some personal care, reading a book on healing, going to a class, talking to someone who is trained in healing, doing body work, studying emotional art, taking a walk in nature, and learning about energy of the soul are all part of self discovery and healing.

Last week and weekend some amazing people came into my life and touched my heart in so many ways in their walk in helping and healing others. They have the ability to hold individuals up and seek only the highest good for those around them. The apples they offered were pure gold, as I could see into their hearts and feel the healing energy around them.

I found myself just wanting to be in their presences and was grateful for the time I had with them. I think that by dealing with our past we can then remember to reawaken our own beauty within ourselves as we share with others.

Namaste,
Ana

Healing in the Workplace

2009-01-30T06:00:00.000-08:00

One of the things that we all might have run into is dysfunctional behavior in the workplace. If you have ever experienced this then you know how it affects your life at home and the people you hold dear to you. It is unfortunate that we can't leave work at work and home at home.

If this is something you are dealing with, then don't think you are alone. One of my teachers says that most people have a pink elephant in the room and everyone pretends that it is not there. Of course this only adds to the dysfunction of the office environment. If any of you have watched the show on TV "Office" and related to it then you know what I am talking about.

Alright here is the deal.... Why not change it so that we are no longer creating chaos and pain as it trickles down to others who are affected in our homes and families?

I believe that we first have to stop pointing fingers at each other and realize that maybe we are part of the problem. I think if we can do that then there is a chance to heal.

Next it needs to be brought to the attention of others. This maybe hard since people are often in fear of being back stabbed or hurt. That means it may be time to bring in professionals who can work with the staff as a whole or on a single basis. By doing this you will have a better chance of pinpointing the problems creating certain situation.

It is important to know that each individual has their own personal baggage form their past which will influence the way that they perceive things. This might mean that personal counseling might need to be added to the intervention of the whole office. Along with having compassion for those who are hurting.

After this is done then the Office and support Staffs need to be retrained in healthy ways to deal with situations and issues that might arise. Often the dysfunction is due to not being properly trained this area. Proper training and boundaries can help solve so many of the problems that contaminate the office and staff environments.

Of course that also means that management needs to be retrained in dealing with all the situations that will occur and have a list of recommendations of how to hold the office staff accountable for their actions. Many times poor management will encourage bad behaviors due to not being strong in upholding the boundaries and regulations of the workplace.

Last is holding each other accountable with compassion that each individual has a right to feel safe and a right to be heard will create a more healthy way of solving problems for the future and will not be carried home to the ones we love.

Ana

Energy Cords

2009-01-26T09:37:00.000-08:00

Now here is something to ponder about which are energy cords or you might have encountered them under the name of codependency. If you are a visual person like me, then think of it like attaching a cord to someone you like. The only difference is that when you do, you start to give them all your energy or personal power.

Everything revolves around what this person is thinking and feeling. You lose yourself in this person and it might seem fine when you love them but you need to wake up and smell the coffee. This is not just about those people in love but can effect all different kinds of relationships such as friends, marriages, coworkers, family relations, etc.....

As you read this someone may be coming to mind. You might even have known someone who has a child and the world seems to revolve around that child. And everyone knows it except the the two involved. The sad thing is that someone in this kind of relationship is always giving and the other is aways taking there is no balance.

The one taking, understands that this is just how it is and will sometimes push things to the outer limits as proof of the commitment form the other person. The giver gives until they are all used up and hopefully realize that they have not been appreciated but only taken advantage of.

This might bring an individual to realize that maybe they were used and that it would be wise to sever the energy cord. The term energy cord comes form all the thoughts, actions, and energy put into the relationship in satisfying the other person's needs.

I have met people in my life who have said, "that life or whatever they were doing was all about, what the other person wanted". "As long as the other person is happy or content then their life was good." That leaves a lot of responsibility for the other person to carry to be happy all the time. And will often retaliate by telling others how unhappy they are with the people pleaser.

If you suddenly wake up and find that you have an energy cord to another person then it is time to sever it and become free. You are not doing them any favors by trying to live your life through them or to please them. In fact you are only a hindrance to them growing. Yes, the other person will know when you have cut the cord and will want you back. Why wouldn't they, when you give yourself to them so freely.

I was taking a class this past weekend in Dennison, TX and the teacher Jody reminded us of the energy cords that we have attached to other people. It of course brought up a few memories for me. Ones that I plan not to repeat......

Jody also talked about how the cords grow in thickness as the relationship gets stronger but not in a healthy way. This makes it harder to cut through but if you need a chainsaw then I suggest you do it for the sake of yourself and them.

Energy cords only drain you of your vital essence, time and energy as you allow all of it to flow to the other person. Remember that getting yourself in touch with yourself may revile some issues that need to be worked out and if this is one of them then the road to healing is putting a stopper in the unplugged drain.

Blessings,
Ana

The Presence

2009-01-25T05:05:00.000-08:00

When I turned 18 my mom and step dad had saved up all their pennies to take our family on a week vacation to Jamaica for the summer. Not only were we going but they saved enough for my little sister and I to each take a friend.

I can't tell you how much fun we had as my parents seemed to spare no expense. As we enjoyed a week of exploring the island and running around, I thought to myself that for some reason I was supposed to be here.

This brought me back to a memory of when I was nine and our music teacher taught us a song in school called "Mary Ann". She told us about Jamaica and how the song was created. At the time I remember thinking, someday I am going to Jamaica. I had no doubt that I wouldn't go, so when my parents announced that we were going I knew some place in my heart that was where I was supposed to be.

Needless to say that we had a wonderful time on our vacation and like all trips ours came to an end. As we were sitting on the plane waiting to take off, my friend had fallen asleep, so I had some time to myself to look around the cabin since we were scattered all over the flight.

It was in that moment that I felt afraid of the plane taking off. It was a panic and fear that seemed to wash over me. The only way I could describe this feeling is the metaphor of jumping into a swimming pool in the middle of winter. It was the shock of this icy cold feeling moving through me that literally froze my bones down to my inner core.

Then as quickly as the fear took a hold of me. I felt a presence that I could not see bush across my body and as it did, the fear started to be replaced with this feeling of warmth. Then a knowing came to me, that everything was going to be alright. At that moment the plane started to taxi down the runway and as it lifted into the air I was in a mental and physical bliss. The peace that washed through me only added to my since of knowing that when it was my time to leave this old earth that this was what it would feel like.

The only reason I bring this experience back up is because last October I flew to LA to visit my little sister and her family. I was in a hurry and so my dear husband made the seating arrangements that was by the window. As I was sitting on the plane waiting for it to taxi, my hand for some reason hit the side of the plane and the whole side seemed to move, which seemed to me like it was caving in where the window was.

Yes, I immediately became panicked since flying is not my favorite way of getting around. The fear that started to move through me was almost the same that I experienced on the trip form Jamaica. Only this time it was stopped in mid stream. Again a flood of peace moved over the fear and washed it out along with a knowing that it was not my time.

This stayed with me through the middle of the flight until I hit the side of the plane again which started the whole process over. I guess the older I get, it is harder to convince me that things are going to be OK.

When I finely got to LA my sister asked me how my flight went and as I started to tell her about my experince, she quickly shut me down. My brother in law feels the same way I do about flying and his job takes him on lots of trips. And how do you tell about this experience without telling the whole thing?

All I know is that for a few times in my life, I have felt like I was cradled in the hands of our Creator and for a brief time in my life there was NO doubt that He exists.

Ana

The Pill

2009-01-23T08:59:00.000-08:00

Awhile ago, it was pouring down rain and I was franticly hurrying because I was late in meeting my good friend for lunch. Since I was in such a hurry, I got in the wrong lane and had to drive around the block which made me even later, since I had to wait again for the light to change.

As I rushed in the door, I saw my friend who smiled and waved. Of course, I immediately apologized and quickly sat down. As she looked at my face she said that she was having one of those days to and shared with me an experience that made her feel rather out of line with the things that were going on around her. Then she ended her story with, "and so I guess I took my pill".

"Pill", I said "What Pill"? "Oh", "didn't I tell you?" She said..... " I took my stupid pill." "Your what?" "My stupid pill", she said. "I take it sometimes without thinking and when I am doing something really dumb, I realize that I took my stupid pill."

Of course this brought on some amazing stories of pain, suffering, being frightened and stupid events along with enormous amounts of laughter as we reminisced over our lives and taking that pill.

I guess it was later, in the afternoon as we walked out on the rainy street that I realized how wonderful it was to know that there was a pill, that we all take in life. And even if it was painful at the time, we could look back and laugh.....

Namaste,
Ana

Divine Intervention

2009-01-23T05:13:00.000-08:00

In the Spring of 2008, I woke up one morning and yes, it was after I broke my rose colored glasses. I found myself in a state of half sleep and half awake. I have learned since then, that this state has a name called, "twilight". As I was laying there on my bed I started to scan the room and noticed to that my husband was still sound asleep.

It was then, that I also noticed that there were two extremely tall figures standing on my side of the bed. I guess you might think that I would panic only they were emanating this beautiful light. As far as I could tell they were not made of solid mass. As I laid there watching them, one of them handed a picture frame to me and said, "look at this". Instantly I recognized the voice that I had heard through out my life and so I took it in my hands and looked.

At first the picture in the frame was empty. Then as I looked, I saw myself working in the church and running around being very busy. One of them pointed to the picture and I heard "See this?" "This is not what it is about".
Instantly the frame went blank.

Next, I saw myself again in the frame only this time I was at the University where I was taking a jewelry class. I was busy working on my newest project and seemed very happy. Again, I heard, "See this?" "This is not what it is about".

About what? I remember thinking.... What are they talking about? Then the picture went blank and started up once more showing me myself, only this time I was at home cleaning and working around the house doing housewife things.
The voice said, "See this?" This is not what it is about."

Then they took the frame away from me..... It was then that I heard another voice that didn't seem to belong to the other two and it said, "Ana, Come with me and let me show you what it is all about." OK, that was it!.......Fear had griped me and I said, "NO"! there was a pause and I heard, "Ana, let go of these things for this is not what it is all about."

"NO!" "I said to them, I will not go with you and I am perfectlly happy where I am and what I am doing!" "Let me be!" The voice that I knew said, "She is not ready." And I heard the voice form the one that I couldn't see say, "Get her ready." Ready? Ready for what? I was thinking as the two beings seemed to fade form my sight.

I turned immediately over and woke up my husband giving him a full account of what just happened. I told him they wanted to get me ready, but for what???? My mind started to race and I thought, Oh no, I am going to die. Oh, they want us to move far away. We are all going to die???? What is going on? Steve spent a few hours calming me down and I finely was able to move past it a little to get on with my day and life....

It was within a few months that my Professor and I who were friends seemed to become a little distant in our friendship. In fact the whole experience made me realize that it was time to move on. So I decided not to sign up for another course in jewelry at the University.

Soon after, that summer we had gone with our family on vacation and again I had another encounter with one of the beings only this time reminding me that it was not good for me to be where I was working and it was time to leave. I dismissed it, and went on with my family trying to enjoy myself. Not knowing what to expect when we returned home.

After recovering from jet lag form our trip to Italy. I came back to work at the church and something was not right. In fact my life became a living nightmare as I tried to integrate back into my work. Only things were not working out even as I tried to ignore it and continue with what I was doing. Things became so bad that I had to leave my position within the first few weeks of returning.

It was a few months after recovering from that painful split that I realized that what I had been through was not something that just happened. This was an intervention of the Divine. I can tell you now that even through my stubbornness that I can learn. I didn't wait around for the third thing to happen.

Also, now looking back and I am truly grateful for all the amazing friends, family and teachers who picked me up off the floor and helped me move thorough this process. Through it all, I have learned that we are never alone in this world even when we think that we are. There are those who love us and guide us even when we can't see or want to change.

I know to, that God, the Creator has a plan and we are all apart of His plan. I see to that fear and being comfortable in our ways can stop us form making a change. This is something that we as human beings do not like doing but it is amazing to me that when we are not on the path we are supposed to walk that the Divine will intervene and set us straight.

Blessings,
Ana

Rose Colored Glasses

2009-01-22T11:47:00.001-08:00

If you have ever worn a pair of rose colored glasses then you know where I am heading in this entry. Unfortunately for me, mine fell off a year ago last February and shattered into a million pieces. I would like to tell you that I was much happier then when I had them but that was not the case. The only difference was, when I didn't want to deal with something I just put them on and things seemed to be just fine.

I am not going to lie to you and tell you that I was happy that they were broken because I spent hours trying to super glue them back together. You seem to only get issued one pair when we come into this life and I had taken very good care of mine. I know that many had lost or broken theirs when 911 happened but mine were still in very good condition.

As I looked around and discovered the things that I didn't want to face were still out there. I started to see and envy others who still had their glasses. Truly this was unjust as I began to notice the things around me that were not what they seemed under the influence of the glasses. Now not only did I have to face the reality of the truth. I had to deal with others who wore their glasses.

Talk about a double whammy. This is like going cold turkey with a major addiction. Fortunately for me, I had a few of my friends and teachers who had gone though this initiation and they were able to pull me out of the fire. For the first five months I thought I was going insane as I had to allow myself to see and experience things around me that I knew were out there but was afraid to see.

I would say that the closest people around me who knew about the loss of the glasses understood the fear that I was experiencing and helped me move through that time in my life. Those who did not, wore their glasses and went though their everyday existence as though nothing had changed.

Now looking back and having survived that whole experience I find that I am more in tune with my life and the world around me. I could even go as far to say that things taste and feel better to me then they did before. I realized to, that breaking my glasses was the best thing that could have happened in my life for now I am really free to experience it the way that we were intended to.

Peace,
Ana

The Wounded Dove

2009-01-22T10:25:00.000-08:00

I sometime think that when we are trying to attain goodness we often fail due to the lack of self awareness. It seems to be in our human nature to go off on a rabbit trail, become distracted by somebody or forget what we were trying to do in the first place. I know that when I look at my own life and those around me I see so many of the wounded doves.

I use the term wounded because it seems to fit those of us in life, who are trying to strive for healing and higher wisdom. We learn to that sometimes it takes falling off the pedestal and stumbling though the darkness to discover the light switch. This process is then followed by picking ourselves back up off the floor and dusting ourselves off. It is then as we recheck our wounds and find that maybe higher wisdom is not climbing back up on the pedestal in the first place and especially in the dark.

But for some reason in the human experience we find ourselves back in the same predicament as before only under different circumstances. Yes, I know it is the same record over and over again. Time for a different tune......so we say, as the monotony continues. Insane, you think, as you look upon the situation from the outside.

So what is it in our lives that cause us to fall for the same old trick over and over again? Maybe by living though the monotony of the process that we began to see that we have the power to change the situation. If this is the case then we will move though a rebirth of change and the insanity will cease.

I sometimes wonder how the solution of something can be so simple yet hard to attain. By looking at every angle it seems very logical to stop but the since of familiarity seems to be the thing that sabotages this whole process. Yes, you got it....knowing what is on the other side, seems to win over the fear of doing something different.

This means that by continuing the path of doing it over and over again, we finely somewhere down the road get it. Giving us the opportunity to make that change and move on. The whole trick is to discover the pattern, learn what you can and become conscious so as not to repeat the mistakes.

Namaste,
Ana

Energy Pirates

2009-01-22T08:06:00.000-08:00

What is an Energy Pirate you ask? Well, it is someone who steals your energy when you are not looking. "Smile" We as humans know that we carry energy and that sometimes it can feel a little depleted. If we really didn't believe that, then there wouldn't be this large market for energy drinks, energy bars, and vitamins etc.... that we buy into trying to get our energy back.

OK, we know that being tired, bad diet, no exorcise and feeling stressed are just to a name a few of how we lose our energy. But did you know that others can steal your energy? It is true! Have you ever been with someone who after you spent some time with them, you feel like you have to go home and take a nap?

Well, this person whether conscious or unconscious is draining you of your vital essence. They are connecting with you on an energy level by being in your energy field and sucking the life out of you.....Another term you might have heard is Energy Vampire.

The first time I heard of it I thought it was funny, until I remembered someone I used to know and when this person came to visit, right after they left I had to go lie down for a few hours. Don't get me wrong, it was someone in my life that I really liked and I am sure had no idea what was going on. But when they left they felt really good, full of energy and I was drained.

It makes since when you are around people a lot. We all have energy fields that surround our bodies. You can call it what you will but it is there in form and color. The only thing that seems to be worse is, if you are already low on energy and that person comes around. Then you are more susceptible to illness because your energy helps with your immune system.

Please, also know that this works to, the other way around. You can take someone else's energy and not know it. You just have to be aware of what is going on when you are with someone. Most of the time people have no clue that this energy exchange is going on but it is real and can effect how you feel.

Here is something to just think about, is when you are with someone and you both do not feel tired by being together. In fact you both may feel really good and energized by hanging out. This means that the two of you are equal and well balanced in the energy fields and that you are both healthy.

So what does this mean? it means that if someone in your life is draining you of your vital essence you may need to do a self check and see where you might have holes in your energy field. This is not a bad thing but is good to know that you have might have a little self care to take care of. You might also limit your time with someone who is doing that. I doubt telling them that they are doing it will help. It might even insult them, again most people have no clue.

Knowing yourself is the best defense against Energy Pirates. Understanding your limitations and what you need, to care for yourself will help prevent this from happening to you. Also, if you are doing this to someone else it is a good time to check and see why you are doing it.

So I leave you with this...... Being aware of the energy around yourself and the people you are with, will help you make better decisions when you are in certain relationships. Learning what drains you and not pushing it aside will also help you find solutions for feeling good and living a healthier life.

Blessings,
Ana

The Breath of God

2009-01-16T03:36:00.000-08:00

I was told that the word for spiritual in Latin means breath. I thought that was kind of funny since that was what first touched me and lead me down a path to find it.

One of the times that I remember being conscious that the breath was tied into something special was when I learned how to knit in my early thirties. A dear friends was over visiting and she was showing me some of her handy work on some afghans that she hand knitted for Christmas gifts for that year.

I decided after she left that I should take a class as it would be an excellent way to make afghans for the children's beds. I found someone in town who taught knitting so I began to learn. The first week I did nothing but practice over and over until I got it right.

It was a few months later as I was working on my second afghan, I noticed that I was holding my breath on certain stitches and letting out on others. I also became aware that the breath followed the same pattern that I was knitting. OK, there are only two stitches when knitting and there are only two when breathing, in and out.

As I became aware, I started to count my blessing in life with the breaths and released my tension as I exhaled. My mind then became occupied with the pattern as it seemed that another part of me counted my blessings with each breath. It was amazing as I started to feel a warmth of love spread over my body as it moved though me and outside of me. The feeling also started to pore and flow into my hands as I worked on each stitch.

I remember that there was a feeling that I was connected to everything and I felt apart of a kind of love that was much bigger than the usual love that we feel for others. This love was in all things, even the things that we as humans don't consider alive. It was huge..........

The only other time in my life that reminds me of that experience was when I was 16 and my Grandmother was in an unhappy mood and what I was doing at the time only seemed to aggravate her more. Don't get me wrong, we were very close but on that day we were both angry at each other and I was on the verge of stomping off when an emotion like a soft breeze swept over me.

I remember it touching my skin and moving not just on the outside but moved though me. The anger was immediately gone and was replaced with this enormous amount of love for her. Only for a few seconds, I could see into her heart and the pain that she carried. The anger that I felt was truly gone and compassion and understanding for my grandmother soaked and saturated my inner being.

I never lost that feeling for her for the rest of my life. What ever happened that day must have been recorded in my soul and my cells because when ever we were on the verge of disagreement, anger was never in the equation when it came to her. People always knew we had a special bond but they never knew how special it really was. I can't ever explain it, but even in the separation of death we are still connected.

I now call it the "Breath of God". I wish it was in all of our relationships and experiences but like everyone else I went though all the trails and tribulations of emotions in the rest of my relationships. You would think I would learn. Only now as I reaccount my memories I am aware that those experiences could have changed my life path had I stayed conscious then.

These experiences of feeling connected later come in short bursts of energy though out the rest of my life but nothing like what I experienced with my grandmother. A year and a half ago after searching for healing, I started to search for the root of this experience and so far the path keeps leading me back to the breath of God.

Ana

Emotional Predator

2009-01-15T11:16:00.000-08:00

I was having a wonderful conversation with a very good friend this past week and the term Emotional Predator came up. I had not heard this term before so I asked her what it was. She replied that, "it is someone who preys on others, who are emotionally weak."

Of course this did not quite answer my question and I had to know more. "Well," she said, "people who have had traumatic lives or carry some kind of emotional pain can be considered easy targets for this kind of predator. "

"It is just as you see it on the "Animal Channel" where the predator stalks its prey for some type of personal purpose. They look for the weakest in the people who are around them that are suffering or hurt and they charm their victims into believing that they can meet their needs."

"All of us who have children tell our kids to not talk to stranger or go with someone who has a puppy. But who tells the adults to do the same when a emotional predator is at large? "

"Words in our vocabulary such as Con Artist, Liar, or Deceiver are only a few names that describe this predator. This type of personality preys on the sympathy and the emotional needs of their prey. They are looking for ways to manipulate their victim so that the outcome benefits themselves. The only problem is that the victim believes that they are being loved or helped to find out later that they were being used."

"Sometimes this type of relationship can cause detriment not only to the victim themselves but also it can reach out beyond to others who are influenced by their relationships with the victim. For example, a parent dating a predator will have an effect with the relationship they have with their children, a boss influenced by a co-worker who is a predator or the other way around will effect the work place and the people around. A person in power who takes advantage of their position miss using people as volunteers will hurt all those who are related to the volunteers etc........"

"The point, Ana, that I am making is that you need to be aware of the relationships in your life that are influencing you and your family. If someone is trying to separate the bonds that you have with others or manipulate you to do something you don't want to do, then you are probable in contact with an emotional predator."

I thought about what she had said and knew that I had met a few emotional predators in my life and had just escaped one recently. I realized that we do need to make sure that we are making healthy choices and following our intuition. When we feel something is wrong, something probably is wrong. God gave us that gut feeling not to annoy us but to tell us something.

Even if you don't care about yourself, please think about all the lives that you touch.

Ana

A Fatal Attraction

2009-01-14T13:13:00.000-08:00

I think what brings to the mind when we think of "Fatal Attraction" is the movie that coined that phrase. Having someone who is emotional unstable stalking someone who has no desire to be with that person seems to be what we all think of. But there is another type of fatal attraction that we might miss that plays a large part in the human experience.

This type of fatal attraction is apart of the lives for those who carry old wounds and emotional baggage from the past. Here is the deal, very few of us are even conscious that we carry it but go ask family and friends and they seem very aware of it.

Because people are often unaware that they carry this pain which attracts others in the some existence who in tern helps perpetuate the unconscious behavior. Then the relationship takes a spiraling down plunge as it attracts and infects others who come in contact with the dysfunctional behavior.

Have you ever heard of the expression that, "misery loves company"? Now take a relationship with the backgrounds of two different types of painful baggage and you will git a reaction. Either they will feed the needs of being miserable or there will be an explosion. These relationships will find ways to grow with its pain by anger, drama, gossip and fighting which if it gets out of hand can also lead to physical violence.

Relationships in this category include, marriage, family, business, churches, sports, friends, schools, PTA, and many other groups that people come in contact with each other. It is really apart of our society that we pretend that we don't see as it still affects so many in our culture.

I was once told by someone that, "people who are hurt will often hurt others". Why do I tell you this you ask? Because unless we become aware of our own baggage then we will attract or be attracted to situations and others who are semiotic in emotional pain and the cycle will continue.

If you have dark memories of your parents fighting and even if they made up, you have already witnessed as a small child this pain threshold in relationships that feeds on each other. If you become aware of someone you work with, who is always looking for high drama then again you are most likely witnessing another example of someone who searches relationships in need of feeding the pain they carry inside.

Please understand that many are addicted to this high drama and dysfunctional relationships as it fuels the hunger of the painful baggage that is carried by an individual. If you become aware of someone who is displaying this type of behavior then you need to remove or distance yourself form that relationship. Chances are high that, that person has no clue that they are doing that and if you see it in yourself, then you need to work on changing it so that you don't continue to bring pain to yourself and others...

Blessings, Ana

A Recipe for Healing

2009-01-12T05:17:00.000-08:00

I was visiting with a friend this past weekend who asked me after coming out of a bad relationship this last summer, why she was still having nightmares. She explained that she had realized that the relationship was abusive and that she knew she needed to get her children and herself out of the situation.

What surprised her the most, was that after months of working on her recovery and coming to terms with the mind games and verbal abuse in her mind, she was still being haunted by nightmares. "I don't understand it," she said, "I know that my decision was right and I have even found a place in my heart to forgive him but the dreams wake me up and I am up for hours." "Can you tell me what I am doing wrong?"

As she was talking to me I was reminded of what my teachers had taught me about balancing the mind, body and soul so I began to explain how we as humans need the balance in our lives for feeling whole.

What I am finding is that when we are dealing with trauma in our lives it can be really hard to let go. It is often hard to forgive others as it is to forgive ourselves for allowing that to happen to us.

You have already done the first step of recovery which is recognizing it for what it was and removing you and your family from the situation. That is the hardest of them all.......So many people will stay in an abusive relationship or environment their whole lives.

Next, is working on balancing yourself in the matters of the mind, body and soul. OK, Let's say for now that your mind understands why you are feeling certain ways about what happened to you. That is a big deal.... Not many people are aware of why they are in pain. This is why they have groups and workshops to help people identify mentally what is happening to them.

But people are still susceptible to relapse and returning to their old ways because they still have to heal in the body and soul. Remember that your body is recording everything in it's "cell memory". This is what causes "old tapes" to be triggered by a conversation, seeing someone or by doing something that would bring it back to the unconscious mind.

OK, here to, the soul also records the experience in the energy that connects the body and soul together. That is why if you get too close to someone that is very intuitive they can read your history. The body and soul must be reunited with the mind in order to allow healing to be affective.

What you are experiencing when you sleep are the "old tapes" that are still recorded in the body and soul that come out of your unconscious. No, nothing is wrong with you. You are just human like the rest of us. The trash is being taken out and the only way the body and soul know how to do it, is to release it when you are asleep and the conscious mind is off.

Of course this is disturbing but it is only a signal form that part of you telling you that you still have to deal with something. You still have work to do......
OK, with that in mind you have to now decide what will help you bring yourself back into balance.

An Example..... would be of someone who is sexually abused may have gained a lot of weight for protection so that by losing the weight they are consciously changing something that they may associate themselves with the trauma. They are learning to reprogram themselves from victim to someone who in in charge of their bodies.... they might also take a martial arts class to bring back personal power in protecting themselves. Diet, exorcise, or any kind of body work helps bring the body back into balance and by being conscious will help connect the change to the soul and mind .

Last is the soul and this is discovering what is inside. It is learning what you are all about. No one can tell you. You have to do the work because it is so personal.

Now, think about this.... The reason that we are attracted to some relationships that the dynamics are dysfunctional is because we need to work out something on the soul level. Often these relationships attracts us because we carried something over from our past or childhood that we still need to work out. We will continue to have this pattern until we change it.

Work of the soul is learning how to listen to yourself and to the Creator for guidance. It can be through learning how to do meditation, energy work, prayer, sound healing or even expressing yourself through art and color etc.... But it is all about learning to connect to the soul and finding where your roots began and end.

So what it boils down to, is that even after counseling or classes that educate on the cause. There is still work to do on the body and soul of bringing the self back together as a whole.

We as human beings are such amazing beings that are so complexed yet each one of us are designed in our own unique way. We just need to remember that what happens to us in life and how we learn to work on healing ourselves allows us to reach out to others.

Blessings, Ana

Contradictions of the Heart

2009-01-10T05:55:00.000-08:00

I don't know if you have ever noticed but our words and actions will often betray the secrets of our own hearts. I call this a contradiction of the heart.

One of my teachers brought this to our attention at a class one day. He mentioned that we often betray ourselves by saying one thing and our body language says another. For example, if someone is telling you, yes they did something but their head is shaking from side to side as in no, chances are they are not telling you all the facts.

As I became more aware of this, I realized that we all seem to have this little habit. I also started to listen to the words that were coming out of my own mouth. You may think this is funny because we believe we are all in control of our words but often when we are speaking, our own words will betray our true feelings. Then the phrases that follow are, Oh I was only kidding, or I never meant to say that become part of our language.

What I have found is that when people are unconscious they speak from their hearts and when they realize that they have just shared something to personal they change their point, influenced by some sort of fear they carry. This presents its self as a duel personality. Split by wanting to do something but for some reason not following pursuit.

So what does all this mean? An unbalance in the soul, mind and body. As you become familiar with your own words and actions, you begin to see it so clearly when you listen to yourself and others as we move in and out of consciousness.

Emotions, longings, missed opportunities and regrets start to show up in our speech and actions. Others around you often pick up what you hide from yourself and are afraid to see or face.......

This reminds me of the story of the, "The Emperor and the New Clothes". Everyone around the Emperor knows that he is nude but no one will say it including the Emperor himself...... Who is the only one who can change the whole situation.

I am not saying run out and tell people that they are wrong. All I am saying is that by being aware of what our own actions and words are trying telling us, we are given the keys of understanding what is inside our souls. For it is all about tunning into ourselves that we can start to balance ourselves again.

Blessings, Ana

The Path of Silence

2009-01-09T04:23:00.000-08:00

As I was sitting in a mandatory meeting one day, a thought formed in my head as I realized just how big the Creator of the universe really was. The thought was sparked by the discussion in the room about people and the politics that were going on.

I remember thinking of a conversation I had awhile ago with a dear friend who I visited as she was recovering from an illness. The first thing out of her mouth when she saw me was, "What happened to you?" " You look sick!" "I am fine", I said, as huge tears rolled off my cheek.

"Ana, you can't fool me, I see that the color around you has turned a pale gray which is cloudy and your eyes tell me you are struggling with yourself inside." " What's up?" This was not my intention at all, I had come to cheer her up but I could see by her expression that I wasn't getting off the hook that easy.

I told her that I had taken my job because I wanted to help people but instead found the ugly politics of religion. What was worse, I found that I was starting to lose myself in it. I was changing into someone that I didn't like.

She stared into space for a moment and then she spoke. "Ana, what you are searching for is not only found in the four walls of the church that you work in." The energy of life and creation of the Creator is found in all things in this world and beyond."

"You are limiting your faith and yourself by looking though a magnifying glass.
Put it down and look around you." "By closing yourself off to this one part of your life, you are trying to fit it all in a box." "Politics happen when there is fear and the resources are short." "Look beyond yourself and the box that you have closed yourself in."

I looked in her large green emerald eyes as they smiled back at me and I asked for a hug. "Thank you," I said, "I have much to think about." I could tell that she was getting tired so I said my goodbye and left.

I wish I could tell you that I was smart enough to take her advise to remove myself form that position, but I wasn't. It was a year and a half later that you could say that, "I began to see the light."

As I sat there at the meeting on that day, her words drifted though my head. I realized that I was miserable and felt caught inside the politics of what others outside the room had no clue of. It was time to see what else was beyond the four walls that I had now limited myself to. My friend had assured me on that day that the resources were out there. It was time to make a move.

Looking back I think of how many of us are unhappy in our lives but are afraid to change things, thinking that if we do, it might be worse than what we are doing now. So we stay and fight others who are in that same frame of mind for recourses that are really abundant to all of us.

I am not saying that change is all physical because it is even more effective when it occurs inside, as we see ourselves in others. But sometimes it takes the action of stepping back and removing ourselves from a situation so we can see the habit or dependence of a situation that creates chaos in our lives.

Seeing now, with different eyes I have discovered that my experience was rich in teaching me about myself and my own behaviors. I have discovered my weakness and my strengths as I am beginning to understand the possibilities of falling. As I continue on my path in life, I have discovered the recourses are truly abundant.

Namaste,
Ana

Soul Sickness

2009-01-07T08:26:00.000-08:00

I am finding that my own experiences plays a big part of my learning and without all the bumps and bruises, I would never understand the full meaning of my own life.

I say this because one of my dearest friends invited me over for lunch the other day and I brought up my feelings about the new Healing group that we were in. I was comparing the groups ability to work with each other to the one that I had left in my previous work position.

"I don't understand it," I said," we all had the same goals yet we were all in such misery," I could see by her silence and her expression she was thinking on how to explain something. Then she asked me why I left......

"Oh, that was easy," as I gave her a metaphor....... "It was like I was standing in a courtyard with the other people and we were all looking at our shoes the whole time. And I was happy until one day I looked up and saw that there was a world out there other than our shoes. "

"I looked around but there seemed to be only a few of us looking up. I tried to put my head down and look at my shoes again but was very discontented with this activity so I started to talk about what I saw only making the others uncomfortable. I found myself becoming angry because I was making myself conform to what the others were doing but knowing in my heart that I wanted to look up and see."

"Talk about splitting in two." "I guess this is what you call, soul sickness." "Good", she said, "That means that when you looked up you started to be aware." "What happened next?" "Besides making myself and everyone around me miserable?," I said. "I left and tried to be alone which didn't last long, so that is why I am in this group."

"Let me explain something," she said, "which may help." There are different forms of consciousness and I know of three them." "They are mass, individual and group." "You will find that all three play into a big part of our learning."

"You ever hear of Mass Hysteria?" "You see, it is a very primitive form of human consciousness. In this state people are only influenced by what the whole mass is doing. If the mass is in a panic then everyone is in a panic and so on. Basically it boils down to is that the individual is not understood as it is a consciousness with only conformity. "

"Now the Individual Conscious occurs when the person discovers they are different and want to be separate from the Mass. Only this can cause problems as we were made and connected to each other. Ever hear of Hermits or Loners? By being in this state you disconnect with all your relations and the people who love you."

"The last is the Group Consciousness and this seems to be what you are referring to as the Healing group. And that is that we all seek the same goal but celebrate what each brings to the table as an individual. There is no form of competition because we all agree that everyone has a different view and a right to say what is on their hearts. We are all teachers as we are all students."

"As far as the group staying that way, is really up to the members. Only time will tell..." I finished my lunch and thanked her as I ran out the door to my next appointment. The drive was long but beautiful as I was thankful for all the people that God had brought into my life.

Blessings,
Ana

Conversations with the Heart

2009-01-06T05:39:00.001-08:00

There are times in our lives when memories come up that are still attached to emotions that we carry in our hearts. You can often see this on the faces of others when they are recalling a story in their past. Emotions such as love, pain, anger and fear are the strongest when this appears.

I remember one time when I was taking art classes in college. I was walking though a different part of the art department and I caught the smell of oil paint which took me completely off guard. It was like being tackled in a football game that knocks the wind out of you. For a few seconds I was knocked out of myself and transported back to a childhood memory of running around my father's studio.

There was no sense of control for I was moved out of one state of being into another for only a few seconds with a single smell. A whole movie played in my head and the emotions of love and contentment filled me up. As I stood there blinking and getting my bearings I began to miss my dad. I was in my early 20's when this happened.

It was much later, as I began to mature that this one experience allowed me to see how strong a past memory can be and how it can effect our lives in healing. You may be familiar with the term "Old Tapes" which I know is used to describe old memories that somehow effect our lives.

Most of the time it is in reference to a behavior that we have been conditioned to form our past. Often it can be triggered by something and the emotions attached can be very strong. The clearest examples are people who have been in wars or suffered some sort of trauma. But these experiences are not unique to only a few. We as human beings share this and I guess you can say, it is what makes us all very human.

Understanding who we are inside and what are our triggers, are really the first steps in changing our lives. Now remember that the experience I shared was strong but it was positive, so know that a negative experience can be almost devastating if it comes in with that amount of strength.

It is important to be conscious that all of us are different in how we experience things in life. Know to that if you have not suffered something as traumatic as war, your body may record an experience with the same amount of painful emotions as someone who did. It is how the Creator made you as a unique individual.

One person can walk away form something and not be affected where as another person may fall apart. It is all how we perceive things. We can't judge ourselves or others by comparison.

Please understand to, that by growing up in the art world I might see things a little differently. So one of the things I started to notice was the wonderful symbols that surround our lives. Thank about it, we have art, writing, people, clothes, companies and products just to name a few. Symbols are all around us. All of these things in our lives represent some sort of personal status that we attach to them. Whether we are conscious or unconscious we believe in these things.

All of this reminded me of a movie I saw as a young adult, as the kid in the movie was chasing Vampires and holds up a cross. The line that gets me is the Vampire looks at the kid and says, " It wont work" the kid says, "why not", and the Vampire says "because you don't believe." Wow, I realized then, that it is though our faith of what these symbols represent to us, that give them power.

Wondering where I am going..... here is the thought. When these experiences in life pop up unexpectedly you can use a symbol that you believe in. An example can be the cross or whatever you believe in to stand between you and the memory. It doesn't matter what it is as long as you believe. This is personal and between you and the Creator.

Once you place the symbol of your choice in the gap, then try to remember that what you are experiencing is only a memory and you are safe. All the emotions and images that are attached to it are on the other side of your symbol. It is by being conscious of that, you can decide to examine the situation with or without emotions or ask for it to leave when you are ready. You are taking back your control with these conversations of the heart.

Traumatic memories keep coming up because the experience is unfinished business recorded in your heart which can be triggered by something around you. The symbol is only a tool to fill in the gap to help you revisit it when you are ready.

A professional Councilor or Psychologist can help to, if you need assistance. You just have to ask. The biggest part about healing is knowing that it all begins within you.

Blessings,
Ana

Consciousness of the Soul

2009-01-05T05:32:00.000-08:00

As I started to become more aware I begin to noticed that some of the people around me often identify themselves with pain, and suffering. And the fear of losing that, was the underlying fear of being left with nothing. This brought me back to a conscious evaluation of myself and my own personal motivations.

You see that what seems to annoy us the most in others are the things that others see in us. And it was at the place that I was working at the time, that pain and suffering were considered a virtue. At the time, I discovered on a level of being unconscious the need to condition myself to fit into that matter of logic.

The whole irony of the situation was that I was completely annoyed with the behaviours of the others around me but found myself trying to immerse myself in the pursuit of personal growth only to be knocked down by my own fears.

It wasn't until I finally realized that the virtues that I was seeking were not leading me down the path toward my goals of personal growth, that I decided to put an end to the insanity. Unfortunately for me, I had become attached to the people around me who shared the same experience, yet seemed somewhat disturbed and restless at the same time.

This made leaving extremely painful as my heart seemed to be ripped from my soul. My mind begin to analysis the situation to find solutions to return but my soul had called it quits. It was time to move on and becoming aware only added to my misery. I have often thought that being unaware was the answer to being happy but it is our souls that always knows the whole truth.

As I removed myself from the situation, I began to heal. I learned to, that by being unconscious in my own actions I had brought the fear, pain and suffering upon myself. I discovered that God had given me the power to release myself from the bondage I created for myself. The only chains that held me down were the ones that I put on myself willingly. I found that I was then given an opportunity to look upon the situation I was released from and learn.

As I am learning, I am discovering that being aware and conscious is being responsible for ourselves. Also that our actions toward others and toward ourselves must be held accountable as we move in our own experience.

Ana

The Legend of Archetypes

2009-01-04T06:29:00.000-08:00

My mentor, and now one of my dearest friends, introduced me to the whole concept of Archetypes and role playing. I thought she was talking about a game, thinking that it kind of ran in the lines of "Dungeons and Dragons". When she first mentioned it, I thought, great...., that is something that really doesn't interest me. Lucky for me that she knows that I am a little hard headed.

"No," she said, "that is not what it is about at all." Then she went on to explain that in life we as humans take on roles that fit our needs or have been conditioned to do and play them out. Ever heard the saying that, "All the world is a stage?" Well, that is where it comes from. "OK", I said, " I get it, I am a mom, sister, aunt, wife, and friend along with my job title, etc."

One of the things I love most about my mentor is that patience is one of her virtues. She always gets this look on her face that freezes for a moment and then she says something like, "OK, that is close but not really it."

There is a lot more to Archetypes than just those roles. Archetypes were introduced by Carl Jung, who discovered that they really represented the different psychological roles that we play in life. For example, you might know someone who always plays the victim. No, matter what happens it is never their fault.

Here is another, the Mediator, you might know someone who is always in the middle of things and wants to help. Or I am sure you have heard of Hermit, Detective, Gossip, Clown, Samaritan, Teacher, Servant, Rebel, Hero, Student, Athlete, Avenger, Bully, Damsel, Martyr and Mentor and the list goes on. There are hundreds more and you are welcome to look this up if you are really interested.

OK, this did spark my interests a little and so I started to investigate. I asked one of my friends who is a professional Psychologist about it and she said, "yes, they study that in school." Wow, I didn't know...... This made me more aware of who I was and the people around me. I noticed that people are not always aware of it, but it was very prevalent in our speech and actions. Of course this made me more self conscious of what was coming out of my own mouth and actions.

Now, this is not a bad thing but understand that each and everyone of us seem to have these attributes. There are good and bad to each Archetype and we find the ones that fit us to get on in this world. I was talking to a lady and she was really upset with herself, she kept telling me that no matter what she did she would somehow find a way to sabotage herself. "The Saboteur." Of course by having this knowledge and being aware of this she could empower herself to change. Listen to what comes out of your own mouth.

Ever hear of the saying, "I sold myself short?" "I gave myself away?" Does Prostitute ring a bell? We all do it at one time or another give ourselves until we are bone dry. It is just a matter of being aware and turning it around to the positive. This teaches us not to give huge chunks of our being to others. By recognizing it in ourselves we are saying, "No, I won't allow this," and even stepping back to give ourselves a break because we are human.

Artist is another one and there are negative sides to that one such as being too eccentric, but it is the positive that needs to be focused on for change. Princess is one that I have heard of often. You even see this in movies like "Private Benjamen." You might work with someone who is one or be one yourself. It is not bad to be a princess, but don't use your power to hurt and control others. If you think about it, a princess can do a lot when they focus on the good. Just look what Princess Diana did.

Some Archetypes really stand out among others like Vampires, Addicts, Healers, Judge, Priest, Misers and Poets who are the Rock and Roll stars of the world.

Have fun with it and know that we are the only ones who can change something in ourselves. It is about looking at the world with eyes of understanding and appreciating what we see in ourselves and others.

Namaste,
Ana

Vibrations of Sound

2009-01-03T04:38:00.000-08:00

I have often wondered, if people are aware, that the resonance of our voices can not only bring us in union with our mind, soul and body, but also to everything else through its vibration. It seems to be a gift that all of us take for granted and most of us are not even aware that it exists. Sure we use our words to express ourselves in opinions or ideas. But we forget about the true vibration of sounds that also plays a big part in connecting us to everyone and everything else around us.

I first became aware of this when I was 19 and was visiting a Convent when I was on a mission trip with a friend who was Catholic. I had always loved to sing and had been in choirs and taken voice growing up. But it wasn't until this one experience that I truly realized that there was something else to it then just putting it all together.

I recall we were woken up early to go to a morning Mass and the Nuns sat on one side and the Priests on the other. It was so early, yet there we were sitting in the cold of the chapel and when they opened their mouths to sing there was something that words can't describe in their passion to praise God.

I remember my heart swelling up and not being able to see as the tears fell on my hymnal. A flow of energy burst though my body as love came crashing in though every pore. My head became light and my breath was caught in my throat as I tried to choke out the words. Then as I brought myself back together my voice blended in unison as the notes vibrated though my whole being. It was something I never forgot.

I bring this up because a year ago I was working with a teacher who was a Mediation Coach. I had been stressed out with the work I was doing associated with my job at the time and was looking for something to help. A good friend suggested I learn how to Meditate. The teacher came highly recommended so I contacted her and started to attend class.

Meditation as everyone knows is about being quite and finding your center or so I thought. It was somewhere in the middle of the classes that she decided to take us to the next level and that was using the voice to chant. OK, I thought, I watch TV and I have seen the Tibetan Monks chanting so this must be something like that. I will try anything to distress.....

She taught us about the seven centers in our body that respond to the vibration in our voice and with our focus on that area could connect us to opening up those places that were blocked with stress. This made since because I was already learning Qigong and I had a little knowledge of this concept. OK, I got it.

She gave us one word to match each center that we were to chant over and over until she cued us to the next one. Then she lead us into the chant. At first I was just trying to match her tone and get the chant right as I tried to focus on the area of the body she asked us to start with.

It was awkward and as we repeated the chant it finely started to flow. As it did I started to noticed a warm rush of energy moving though my body and it felt like it was spinning in the area that I was focusing on. It felt warm and soothing as I started to lose myself in the moment.

She switched to the next chant as the chant's vibration moved up the body to each center. It wasn't until we reached the very last one at the top of the head that I felt an explosion of energy and release. It was then that I began to cry like a baby as the tears flowed out of my eyes like a fountain. Embarrassed I tried to recover what dignity I had left but my body had other plans as it released all the tension that I had been hording.

The whole experience was powerful and I went home limp but recovered by the next few days with a renewed sense of passion for life again. At the time I was singing with my daughter in a little band at our church and as we were singing I noticed that I started to open up as we performed.

I noticed that I was not only more conscious of what was happening inside of me but also felt a connection to something much bigger than myself. I felt this union of being connected again with the great Creator Himself and all that he had created as the air pushed out from my belly and moved though to my heart. It was through my experience that I had learned to open up and let the breath of God pour into my whole being as I raised my voice.

It was just before the Christmas holidays that I met my new friend for lunch and she shared almost the exact experience. For me it was another conformation that again life has so much more to offer than what we see.

Peace be with you,
Ana

Language of the Body

2009-01-02T07:18:00.000-08:00

Did you know that the body has it's own language and I am not talking about the language you see outside the body but inside? Yes, it does and each organ has its own sound that it makes when it is healthy and functioning properly.

Think about this..... you have a beautiful symphony playing inside your body when you are in the perfect health. When you are ill your body would be like striking a key on the piano that is out of tune. Each and everyone of your major organs has its own sound which includes your brain, heart, lungs, liver, spleen, and stomach just to name a few.

It was the ancients who had first discovered this and knew that illness would be prevalent when the body was out of tune. By knowing this they also learned that energy which they called Chi could be used when chanting and directed with focus toward the organ would also bring healing to that part of the body.
It kind of reminds me of fine tuning a beautiful interment before you play.

A year ago I had the privilege of studying with a teacher who taught the art of Qigong. It is a form of martial art that focuses on healing and energy of the body. The whole experience was enlightening, if you ever get the chance to try it. I think it was the first time in my life that I learned to really focus and tune into my own body with an appreciation of how I was put together.

This past holiday I got to watch a movie called "Australia" and loved it. I especially liked the part of the Aborigine child who said that, "I will sing you to me". To me, it touched my heart because inside we each carry our own song of love and healing. It is all there, we just have to take the time to listen. As we learn more about ourselves and tune into our own hearts life becomes more than just an average day but a true experience of wonder.

Ana

The Divided Selves

2009-01-01T07:16:00.000-08:00

This is the time of the year that most of us often reflect on ourselves and look at what we want the new year to be. Often we start with new resolutions and plans to change the old habits. As we move through this process it is good to remember that we, as beings, are divided into the three selves of mind, body and soul.

So often we forget that bringing these three into balance is the key to having the success in bringing our personal goals into focus. As we reflect we can see that our soul calls to the mind, which sets the goals, and the body follows in pursuit of action.

The first time I personally became aware of the division of the three, was in a time of grieving. I discovered that my mind knew that the person I had lost was in a much better place away from pain and illness. It was my body, in the form of my heart, that picked up the grief and loss. Tears flowed out beyond my own control of missing the person and feeling alone.

I think it was a month later that I was driving home from buying groceries. I was sitting at a stop sign, when I felt an overwhelming sensation of presence of the person who passed. It was so strong, and the love that I felt at that moment was instant recognition of that person's soul who I had lost.

I guess you could describe it when you greatly love someone you hadn't seen in a long time. They walk into the room, and our heart swells up with joy of being together again. It only lasted for a few seconds, but the experience was huge and the knowing that that person's energy was all around me at the time never left me.

I realized for the first time that it was my soul that knew before my body and mind that something incredible had happened.

It was a few years later when I decided that I needed to lose a few pounds. I discovered that I could make a decision with my mind to lose the weight but if my heart and soul were not in it I was lost. Once this was established, my body was ready for the change and followed in action to success. It was all about making sure that the three were balanced and on the same plan.

There are times in our busy schedules, when we don't take the time to check to see if we are in balance, and wonder why we are not able to keep the goals we set for ourselves. The way God created us is beyond anything we could ever imagine, but it only takes a few minutes to stop and check to see if we are in line. So often we take better care of our possessions and others than we do ourselves.

So when something is not working give yourself a break, be gentle with yourself, and take a little time to do a self check to see where you are. And please know that you are a miracle in itself, just as you are.

Enjoy the New Year!
Ana

Moon Cycles

2008-12-31T07:14:00.000-08:00

Did you know that we as humans cycle with the moon? We do...... It is kind of weird but there seems to be a pattern.... I didn't know this. It wasn't until I was talking to a friend and mentioned that I have bursts of inspiration where I feel very creative and focused. And then there are other times I could talk the ear off a flea and only want to be out and about with people.

My friend said, "you know Ana, you should chart your moods with the moon cycle. The moon has a gravitational pull on the earth and it does effect the tides in some way and we as humans are made up of a high percentage of water". Hmmm... I was thinking to myself this might help me to know when I could sit and really work on a piece of my art without feeling I need to get up and be somewhere else. "OK, I will do it!" And for the next six months I started to chart my focus.

My daughter helped me find a site on the internet that told us what phase and also gave the percentage of when the moon was waxing and waning. I had no idea what each meant as I started out. I charted my creativity and my social patterns.

The results were amazing and seemed to follow a pattern. I found that when the moon is waxing and getting closer to the full moon I was more apt to wanting to be out with others in a more social environment. It was when the moon was in the waning cycle I wanted to stay closer around the house and was more focused and able to be creative with my hands.

During the cycle of the full moon for each, I found that I could not sit still but needed to be out of the house and was again inspired creatively only it was more verbal and people oriented. This information was great because now I could tell my friends and family when I needed to be alone and when I could give them my full attention without feeling guilty of wanting to be working on my art.

Trust me it does make a big difference in relationships knowing who you really are and accepting others for who they are........

Blessings for the New Year!
Ana

Happy Holidays!

2008-12-25T06:06:00.000-08:00

As I wake from dreaming I am excited about the day and also very excited to be with some of my family as we celebrate the holiday. I am also so grateful for all the wonderful friends and family who are in and out of my life that I share so much with but know we all can't always be together.

Yesterday, I shared my experience of feeling energy but please know that it is not just a chosen few that can feel this. It is a gift given to each and everyone of us. We all have the ability to feel and experience energy and be aware of what is happening to us.

If you think about all the people you have loved or that loved you on this earth that have passed on before you, then you know that they are sending out their love and prayers to you, just as you might still pray for them.

Energy is not just of this earth but is in all realms of existence. In truth if you don't already know this your soul is made up of pure energy and if you even think our bodies are amazing in the way they run and function then the soul will blow your mind.

Now if you understand this, wrap your mind around this........Each and everyone of us have been given gifts even beyond our own comprehension. Call them what you may, like spiritual gifts, intuition, seeing, knowing or being sensitive to name a few but we all have them. Oh it is all there, even in your DNA. Just ask your family about it, someone will talk.

When you think about it, the body and soul are all connected and the body is the major key to sensing energy around us. For me, I know my arms will tell me something is up. Remember we talked about the different body parts that connect emotions to certain organs. Mine is my heart which is connected to the hands and arms.

An example would be like, for me I might get a feeling of heavy syrup coating my arms and when this happens I check into my heart area because I know that I can often be sensitive at picking up things that are not my own emotions. This immediately tells me that someone is not doing well and they are in a mood that might need to be approached with caution.

By knowing your own body signals you can connect with your emotions and you are in a better place to offer assistance if you need to, rather then being pulled into their emotions and only adding to the problem. Knowing what is yours and what is theirs is a big deal.

There are so many other ways we sense and see things that I could go on for hours but know this..... that each and everyone of us are amazing in how we are created and designed. There are no mistakes in how we are made and that the gifts we were given were from the great Creator Himself, with that in mind know that all we have to do is be aware and accept..... Oh, and always be responsible for them to..

Love,
Ana

The Gift

2008-12-24T07:49:00.000-08:00

This morning as I awoke and started to become aware of where I was I felt this amazing feeling of waves washing over my body. It is a feeling of laying on the beach in the shallow part of the water and the waves moving over your skin. The only difference with me is that it starts from my head and moves down though my body to my toes.

After this sensation started then a feeling of a warm prickly feeling started to move from my core and out though the rest of my body. It is like when you are cold and someone gives you a blanket that has been heated and you wrap yourself up in it. I would describe the prickles like your foot going to sleep but this does not hurt it just feels like everything is moving yet it is feeling of peacefulness and bliss.

If you are wondering if I was afraid? Then you should know that this has been happening to me for the last seven months. It started out when I would go to bed and at first there was fear because I felt movement but then as I would give into the feeling of peace I would be gently rocked to sleep.

Of course I told my husband and my family and when my daughter said that she was experiencing the same thing and it started at the same time, it kind of made us both realize that it was something unique. I must admit that once you get over the fear of something new then it is a very pleasent sensation.

It got to where I was sitting still during the day and would relax I could feel it and I need to warn you don't do this while driving. It makes it hard to concentrate and I would get lost or needed to pull over as the waves moved though me. All I had to do was relax and it would pulse over and though me.

Yes, I spent hours on the internet looking up what was happening to both me and my daughter and could not find an explanation that seemed to fit just what we were experiencing. I emailed all the teachers that I had meet and they could not offer an explanation and would say, "just enjoy it, it is a gift."

Growing up I made my parents crazy because I was never satisfied with the standard answer, I wanted to know how things worked and why. If they couldn't explain it to my satisfaction, I would go on and on about it until I found an answer. Something I have learned about myself is this has Not changed since I was a child.

This is not something you talk about in the open during lunch with the girls, in a meeting or out shopping with friends. It is hard to explain in common every day conversation. And if people are unaware of the energy that moves though our bodies then it makes it hard to explain. Since there were two of us feeling the exact same thing then I felt like I needed to find some explanation.

I did discover that I could control it when it came when I set my will so that it just couldn't creep up on me. I also discovered that before I fell asleep or woke up was the best time to let it flow.

One day I got an email from a friend and was invited to hear a teacher speak about energy. Yes, I signed up immediately and drove up to Plano the next week to listen to what this teacher had to say.

It was in the middle of the class that I finely got up my nerve to ask my question and ask I did and the answer was," I don't know but it sounds like a gift, so enjoy it." My heart sank and as I was giving up a lady in her early twenties tapped me on the shoulder behind me and said," I know what it is that is happening to both you and your daughter. "We can talk after this is over."

It seemed hours getting though the rest of the lecture but I made it and finely turned around to listen to what this young lady had to say. Her first question was, "do you have a big family?" A big family! What kind of question was that! I thought in my head. My answer was "yes", "I guess but I was adopted," wondering where she was going.....then she said " I don't mean your living family, I mean the ones who have passed on."

Oh great, I thought....... Then she said " I believe that the energy that you are experiencing is coming from the prayers of your Ancestors who have past on to the other side and are praying for you and your daughter." Of course my first thought that started though my head was....... but all of a sudden, I felt a ring of truth in her words and the feeling that the answer I so sought out was solved. I could feel it deep within my own soul the love and prayers of others with this amazing love. I had my answer!

Lately my daughter and I have learned to live with this energy. She tells me she does not notice it as much anymore. I on the other hand let it flow when I get time to sit quietly or when I wake up in the morning if I get a few minutes to not be hurrying around. Neither of us know what happened in our lives that made the shift for us to be aware of it but all I know for sure, it is a gift.

Blessings,
Ana

The Other Side of the Coin

2008-12-23T15:27:00.001-08:00

The other day we were driving to the airport to fly out to visit my little sister and her family for Christmas. We were all packed and snug in the car as I listened to my two children play a game in the back seat. My son had a card deck and was asking his sister what color was the card he had in his hand. Well, there were only two colors and black or red were it.

Of course this gives you a fifty fifty chance of getting it right and my husband who is an Engineer was enjoying figuring out all the averages. I listened in until I was caught and was called in to play as he went through the whole deck. As we swished players I thought about playing heads or tails with a quarter which seemed to follow the same rules.

Then I remembered a saying that I heard once and would try to apply it when I could. All it said was, "what's on the other side of the coin?" Often we come to situations in life that we need to look at both sides of the coin. So many times we only see one side and so we miss out on the other fifty percent of what life has to offer us.

I think it is there when we flip the coin and remember the other side we realize that there really are two sides to each and every story that life becomes more interesting. We are all created to see form our own point of view but looking at things form someone else's prospective allows us to see a much bigger picture.

Ana

A Special Purpose

2008-12-23T05:49:00.000-08:00

Ever have those times in life that no matter what we do it just does not work out? It may seem at the time that we were called into action but once we start to really get into the middle of it, it just falls apart. I know that my heart has lead me down different paths in life looking for something that I was called to do, yet way back in my mind I knew it wasn't right.

Growing up there was a popular movie at the time staring Steve Martin called "The Jerk". In it he was looking for his special purpose. Now as I am older I find that I meet so many people in life who are changing their careers and their life styles starting from their 30's. The phrase "I don't know what I want to be when I grow up" is often the topic of lunch or groups as they are going back to school or changing jobs and careers

No, this is not all about money. People with high paying jobs are leaving their positions and seeking out ways to help others or finding something that is more in sink to meet the needs of satisfying what is calling out to their heart.

I remember when one of my friend's husband announced that he was no longer going to be an Engineer but was going back to Grad school to be an Architect. They had three children and another on the way and she was a full time mom. This was awhile ago and I know that the rest of us didn't understand the change in lifestyle. But now he and the family are very happy and he enjoys going to work every day doing what he loves the most. She is still a full time Mom and amazing at that.

Others as they come in and out of my life are making changes in their lives and some are being pushed on to other paths by unknown forces. I do believe that we are all created to have a special purpose in life and that often we don't see it because we are too focused on at what we have at the time.

Often we are too afraid to move and so we are then moved to fit into the Creator's bigger plan. It seems that most of us are still searching and many of us are taking the big plunge but when it comes down to it all we are all looking for the same thing which is finding where we fit in and what we are called to do in this beautiful world of ours.

As Steve Martin says in the movie, " Look Ma, I found my Special Purpose!"

Many Blessings,
Ana

A Voice of Gentle Reason

2008-12-22T16:34:00.000-08:00

I guess one of the things that we often ponder is the question, are we alone in the world or universe and I don't mean family or friends. So many times I have thought about this question myself and wondered if we live in such a big space, "can we be the only ones here?" I am finding for myself as I am leaning that there is more to this earth that we can see even with our own eyes.

As we become more aware we start to experience things that seem to tell us that we are not. I know in my own experience I discovered that we are not always doing things alone.

When I was six years old we had a working ranch in Presidio, TX. I was in first grade and the bus would always bring me home. One day I arrived before my parents could get home from errands and found the whole place deserted. I panicked and started to walk over to the neighbors house that was one and half miles next to the highway. I remember crying when I heard the voice tell me, “Don't cry, I am with you.” I stopped crying and felt someone around me.

To make the story short I did make it to my friends house and played until my parents found me which I had already forgotten about them not being at home. It was all though out the rest of my life that, that same voice would come into my life a kind and gentle voice of guidance.

It wasn't until I met my husband for the first time that I really heard the voice strongly say,.... “That is him”! "He is the one!" 'Him who?', I asked but I knew what it meant.” We married nine months later. And nine months after we married we had our daughter.

Last year even though I didn't want to admit that there was really something out there as a guardian angel , or guide following me around that I agreed to go to a Healing Seminar. I went with a friend who took me under her wing to show me that there was more to this life than what we can see. I went only to apease her and go on with my life without much thought of it. It was when our teacher had us do a meditation that things began to shift. In the meditation we had to ask if there was an angel or guide to please give us proof by showing us something close to our heart that only we would know.

Of course since I was there in the group I went though the mediation so that we could get to lunch. I was starving and I was getting tired of sitting in the class. He dismissed us for lunch and we ate but before we got back we went to the bookstore that was right next to where our class was.

It was there in the corner of the store I saw this necklace and it was a design I had drawn, up in the mountains of Taos when a teacher asked me to go inside myself and find my inner core. It was a drawing of something so special with personal symbols that meant a lot to my heart. I saw it and I grabbed up the medallion throwing it in the back of the old shelf and skulked back to the class.

“How could anyone steal my design!", I complained to my friend.
I had not shared it with anyone it was too personal!

Of course the first thing the teacher asked when we started class was, “Did anyone get a sign or something from their angel or guides that told them that they were real?” OH No!

I forgot! I looked at my friend as the color drained from my face and I realized that it was from someone who knew who I really was deep within. I quickly went back to the store and dug though all the Jewelry to find the design as soon as the class let out. I took the time to really look at it and turned it over which reviled the words” Please Guide this Woman” Amazed I bought it and restrung it wearing it to remind me that I was not alone.

Today I have moved past having to wear my necklace everyday as a reminder but I am always aware of the guiding voice that warns me or reminds me when I need to do things. I am not saying that I am always good at listening though........

Ana

The Essence of Power

2008-12-20T17:50:00.000-08:00

Power and control is something we all know exist but no one likes to talk about. It is the child that runs amok in the room and we go on like it wasn't happening. The only problem is that when you decide in your life that you are going to take control of your own life you have to set boundaries and become more aware of where others are losing or trying to gain their power.

By looking at the situation this way, it brings a whole different light on someone who is hurting and hurting others. You soon become aware that, that person is struggling inside trying to find or gain the power or control that they feel that they need to survive. Somewhere in their lives they were taught that there was not enough power inside and lost all their control to someone else.

Now you may find someone using their power to control others in their words they speak, energy they take or the position they have, which could be family or job related. This form of relationship always seems to struggle often destroying the relationship beyond repair. Families split apart, coworkers leave their jobs, friends and neighbors no longer speak all a result of people losing what they already possess which is the power to control the lie that they carry inside.

No, we can't really control someone else. For if the body is enslaved the mind is not or the mind enslaved the body rebels and the spirit always remains free. We are intended to be, no matter who tells us that we are not, to be as we were created.

The true essence of power is learning how to balance the power that we possess inside so that we lift others and ourselves to the highest potential. Sound easy? No, not really it can be a life's work but you know as I always say it is about taking that first step and being aware of the real control in our own lives.

Many Blessings,
Ana

Physical Emotion

2008-12-19T07:17:00.000-08:00

One of the many things that I learned form a Teacher in Taos was the emotions can be felt physically in the body. I know you are thinking, "well yeah, doesn't everyone feel emotions in the body'? Yes, they do but did you know that you can feel different emotion at different locations in your body including different parts of your brain?

This is something to really think on that if you are having some self esteem issues where do you think you might feel it? The answer may be in your solar plexus which is located right above the navel area. This whole area seems to be really sensitive to will power, self control and feelings of self development. Next time you are feeling powerless or over powerful try to be aware of where it is coming from.

Of course the big question is why do we care? Because if you are losing that emotional energy or bringing in too much energy then it will probably effect those organs that are located in that area. Again it is all about balance, if not corrected then you may be taking time off to visit a Doctor.

Try this one..... Do you have lower back pain? Then you may be dealing with issues of stability, security, trust, or basic survival needs. Again the body is affected and recording all of your emotional feelings in you physical body.

Let us go with the favorite that everyone is aware of, the heart. If you are feeling a gain or loss of love, empathy, compassion, or tolerance then it is somewhere in the heart region. Ever have a broken heart? There is a reason they say it is broken in the heart, you most likely feel it very strong in that area of the chest. What organs are around that area? Well, there is the heart, lungs, and they seem to effect the arms and hands. It is all connected...

Here is another good one..... I bring this up because it affects us Artist and anyone in Communication. The Throat Area is one of the places that we miss in our body. It is where we express ourselves and if you have ever heard the expression, "They got all choked up" then you know what it is like trying to talk or give an opinion when your throat is closing up which also has an affect on the thyroid or parathyroid organs.

This part of the body deals with the issues of creativity, music, truthfulness, intelligence and inspiration. It is a major part of expressing ourselves and someone who has lost their voice and I use the example of abuse will often feel like they can't communicate their feelings which makes it all the more important for them to open and use their voice in an environment that is safe. This will help them recover some of the pieces that they have lost of themselves.

The other part of the body that I like to bring up is the crown or the top of the head. This part of the body seems to tingle and you get an almost high feeling when you are praying or feel connected to God. It is known for the feelings of enlightenment, confusion, apathy, spirituality,or ability to learn also affecting our cerebral cortex, and central nervous system.

It is also where our knowledge of God and all of creation seems to permeate our bodies. Please know that the feeling of a great loss can cause energy blocks that will also affect this area which communicates to the whole body a feeling of loss of well being.

So those are only a few that I mention so that if you are interested you can investigate further. I didn't get into the brain but the brain will also connect with the different emotions that we feel. You can feel anger in one part apposed to feeling that you are mistrusting someone in another part or true love is one of my favorite areas of the brain. Again our bodies are amazing in the way they were created and how they function.

Peace be with you
Ana

The Nature of Balance

2008-12-15T06:05:00.000-08:00

I guess we have all heard the expression that, "Life hangs in the balance". I had to stop and think about this as I awoke from a very refreshing nap a few days ago. It seems that my dreaming was all about how things were balancing in my own life.

We as human beings have so many things in our lives that we have to balance. We are constantly in the motion of balancing the checkbook, work, play, kids, house, relationships, health, food and the list goes on...

It seems that it is in those times when we are out of balance in some aspect of our lives that our soul seems to weaken. Our minds and bodies follow this by over compassionating and creating more friction in our lives that we either become ill or depressed. Often we look for medication or Doctors to solve our problems or some way to push it down inside as we continue the vicious cycle of our busy lives rather than finding what is screaming that it is out of balance.

Other times we look to others and their problems to focus on, rather then looking inside ourselves for the answer. I am reminded of flying on an airplane when the Stewardess tells us that in case of an emergency that when the masks drop down we are to place the mask on our own heads first and then place the mask on others. We can't help others when we are unconscious.

Now here is the funny part, so often we pick others in our lives unconsciously facing the same trials and tribulations as ourselves. It is almost like we are trying to solve our problems though them and when we do we can heal ourselves. The only problem is that we all heal and learn on different levels of the spectrum, so if they are ahead or behind us it can cause problems in the relationship. Again we are talking about balance. What does this lead to gossip, anger, sadness and a wide variety of other emotions that send out warning signals.

I had a wonderful Teacher in my life tell me that,"healing is very self centered".
It is all about you and you alone. This goes against the grain of our culture but it is a huge step in being aware and being aware of the true self. By making this step, the next step is locating where the balance in our lives is out of balance. Looking within and not looking at others so that we find the cause to move though the process of healing allowing our soul, body and mind to reconnect and once again we become one with our true selves.

Love and Peace
Ana

The Voice of Emotion

2008-12-13T06:46:00.000-08:00

I have been noticing when I am listening as someone is speaking that fear will sometimes creep into the vocal cords and display its self. Often the speaker is guarded and not aware that they are sending out those signals. There seems to be a pattern in the subtle tones of the voice that give away the emotions and intention in the body language that follows, confirming the signal is clear.

The change in the vocals in the voice happens so slightly that the emotions start to stir in the receiver, kind of like turning a knob on a radio tuner as the body lines up with that person's feelings. It seems to happen so naturally that I don't believe that most of us are even aware of the slight change.

I guess it could be called empathy or connecting with the other person but it becomes a process of learning how to define the line of who's emotions are whos. I bring up fear because fear and love are the two categories that my Teachers taught me that all emotions can line up under.

The only reason that I became aware of this is that I noticed as people were speaking, the emotions in my own body were starting to change ever so slightly as I listen to their words. But it was the vocal changes in their voice that moved me to action or set of the alarms.

Thinking more about this I remembered that when we are in the womb we don't understand the language that our mothers are speaking but it stands to reason that we could pick up on the vibration of the voice and the vocal changes expressing the emotion. Maybe this is the reason we can sway each others emotions not only by the power of our words but the vibrations of the vocal cords. Just something to ponder....

Ana

The Art of Judgment

2008-12-12T06:30:00.000-08:00

Judgment, how many times do we run into this, not only with others but inside ourselves. Judgment can be something that we become aware of when our lives become unbalanced. Often it will come with a fear that we are carrying inside because if there is only love in our hearts there is no room for what we fear.

Often we think that others are very judgmental but if you really get down to the nitty gritty of listening to our own inner being inside ourselves we will find that judgment of the self is so strong. As I have this amazing opportunity in my own life to interact and visit with people, I am able to reflect on myself. I find that we as human beings beat ourselves up for not being perfect and if it is not that then there is always something else we can find.

We hurt ourselves for; not being smart, our weight, our appearance, power, money, age, relationships, jobs, sex, control, and the list goes on.....
And as we do, we judge others by our own standards that we ourselves can't attain in life.

Why do I bring this up you ask? Because the first step to healing our emotions inside is to be aware of this and finding the fear or the lie that we accepted as truth. It is there in that awareness that we can free ourselves from our on inner bondage granting mercy to ourselves and others.

Looking at our judgments and fears as someone once said "are the first steps in a thousand mile journey to finding the peace inside". Yes, I know it is a long path that we will walk but think of the freedom in your soul you have when you get to the end.

Love and Blessings
Ana

The Subtle Energy of Color

2008-12-10T06:31:00.000-08:00

One of the amazing things that I have been learning about energy is that it comes in different colors. I don't know if you know this but if you think about it makes a lot of sense because color can be measured in wavelengths. The energy that each color produces can be recorded in THz that sends out a vibration energy.

Just think about the power of the laser and what we do with the different levels of light and color. Also, how much do we see the color that is transmitted through our TVs? (More energy) OK, with that in mind think about your body and the energy that it produces with just raw emotion. We have already talked about emotional energy going out in a crowed room. So now imagine that emotion comes in different colors, kind of like ice cream comes in different flavors.

Yes, some people can see this color energy with the naked eye circulating around the body. Other people who are real sensitive can feel the energy and close their eyes and see it in their minds eye. It is just another way that our bodies are programed to pick up the subtle energy around us.

Now if you are going to work with energy it is probably best to know what these colors mean and how they relate to the person that you are working with. I have had the honor of meeting a real Medical Intuitive. These people can scan the energy that is in your body and find hot spots that tell them that something is not right. They can tell you where it is located, say for example your liver or heart and with this information you can go to a Dr. and have it checked out. Yes, they can detect cancer among other things.

It reminds me of the animals that we have read about that can tell the owner if the person has a fatal disease or heart condition that needs to be looked at. Please, no disrespect to the Medical Intuitives it is just an example of how we don't always understand how it is done, but it is out there.

The colors around the person not only tells about the emotions or illness that the person is experience but can also tell about where that person is in their life walk.

Now, lets change this over to art and clothing. Color again is energy that can be felt by another person but is also felt by the person who is producing it. Looking at a piece of art can tell a lot about what the Artist is feeling and what they were thinking by just examining the colors. You may be attracted to that piece of art because you like the color?

You see, we are attracted to colors like we need different food in our diets. You crave a cretin food because your body needs it and the same goes with the color energy. Look at your wardrobe and see what colors you are buying or what you feel, that is the key word...... what you feel like wearing.

Look at your home.....What colors do you surround yourself in? Just something to make you think when we are not running a million miles a minute. The information is all there you just have to stop and be aware of it, kind of like taking time to smell a rose.

Many Blessings, Ana

The Journey

2008-12-09T11:27:00.000-08:00

They say the fastest way between two points is a straight line. This is something we have always known. My view on it in the past however has been wanting to forgo that straight line and be where I was going yesterday. Christmas holidays, Summer vacation, Europe, or a party just to name a few of the events that I hurry to be apart of.

When I was a little girl my mother used to tell me that the whole point of the straight line is the adventure and the journey is the key to whatever life holds. Of course it wasn't until much later in life that this had any meaning for me. I discovered that making the plans, preparing, traveling or the people that I met only added to the joy to whatever event life handed me.

As I started to look at the journey we have in each of our own lives and how we connect with each other. I began to realize that there was more to life than the final destination. Each of the side trips or delays that interfered with us getting to where we thought we should be only added more color to our stories.

It is in these moments that we take a breath and look around us and see where we have been and how much we have grown inside our own being that really tells our story. It is a time to stop and enjoy what we do have and who is in our lives. It is about living the journey....

Ana

The Power of Love

2008-12-09T04:50:00.000-08:00

Today I had the honor of experiencing something very special as I was visiting someone. The person I was seeing was a cousin who is very handicapped and most everything in her life has to be done by someone else. She is completely dependent on another human being for her everyday life activities. Each time I see her she is smiling and happy unless she is sick.

Today was no different and as I was spending my time with her I looked around at the others in the room who were also in one way or another with the same existence. It was then that I became aware of the love that was being broadcast silently though out the room. As I let myself open to feel, I had the experience in my own heart of a feeling that was a pure joy.

Driving home I had to think about what had happened to me and what caused this amazing love in my heart. I thought about people who have children who are handicapped and often we think, "Oh, I am so sorry that you have a child like that and they have to endure that." But we have it wrong because these beautiful souls have something much bigger to share with us than the average everyday problems.

As I remembered standing there with my heart open I could feel and see the love that moved around the room. Each of the ladies who were there had a love that surrounded them in what they were doing as they facilitated the group. My cousin and her friends were enjoying each others company and the love for each other was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

If you are not around that much love coming out of that many people then it can be a little like being tipsy. As I stumbled back to my car, I realized that something very special had just happened and I was very blessed by being apart of it.

Ana

Energy Blocks

2008-12-07T05:32:00.000-08:00

Learning about energy and working with it is something that I really enjoy now that I am more aware of it. I don't think that people even realize how much it effects our everyday living.

Now here is the part that everyone forgets, the part that we learned in grade school that everything is made up of those atoms and tiny molecules. Everything is buzzing because it is moving whether we see it or not. Most of the time your body detects it without your knowledge. Kind of like your heart beating and you never think about it. It just does........

Think about this..... when you walk into a crowed room of people and you began to pick up emotions which is raw energy you are drawn to certain people in that room. As you talk you find that you may have a lot in common and if you don't you quickly move to find someone else that seems to fit your energy pattern. This can mean a friend, romantic or healing match. It is always there......

As someone who is learning about energy I learned that our bodies put out this flow of energy that moves through us like an oscillating fountain. It is constantly in motion inside and out.

When we are healthy then it moves and flows though our bodies restoring and repairing it. It is like the blood flowing though our veins bringing nutrients to the body only energy gives us a feeling of health and vitality.

Now, when it is not flowing then we feel slow, sluggish and tired not quite ourselves. Yes, energy can get stuck when our emotions are out of whack or we have run ourselves into the ground. When this happens then we are more prone to diseases and if we are already carrying one it can cause great distress and make it more active.

The idea of energy is to keep it flowing and moving though the body like it was designed to do.

I must confess that I was not a believer until I was visiting my Mom in Taos, NM. I was having allergies form the construction at the place where I worked and it had turned into a big infection so I took some time off to see Mom. Flying and getting on a bus with people on a two hour ride from the airport in Albuquerque did not help at all. By the time I got there I collapsed and was miserable. My ears had closed up and nose had stopped up. You know the regular allergy stuff.....

Mom finally said, "You know Ana I have this friend and she is known as a Healer and she might be able to help you." I was taking drugs and nothing seemed to help and at that point I would have done anything. "OK," I said as I blew my nose for the millionth time feeling like it was going to fall off....

She called her friend and Jean came over. I didn't know what to expect, I just wanted relief from my state. I remember she came over and they began to talk just about their regular day to day things and as they did Jean asked me to sit down on a chair where she pulled one up next to me and placed her hands behind my head and on my neck.

I remember the feeling of a warm rush of heat running through my head and into my sinus that ran down though my nose and ears as they began to open up. I could hear and breath without my nose being blocked. The warm heat then began to flow though my chest and into my lungs that had been fighting for breath which started to relax as my body stopped fighting. She only worked on me for 10 min and without missing word of conversation said goodbye and left to do other things on her agenda. I went to bed and slept for the first time in weeks a very sound and deep sleep.

When I awoke I asked my Mom for her number and scheduled an hour session with her. I didn't know what she did but I was now a true believer. I met her at her home where she did her work the next day. As I laid on her table thinking what am I doing, she bought out this bowl and struck it over my body which sounded like a thud..... OK, OK, Lets get on with it, I thought as she did this...... Not knowing where this was going........

She laid her hands on my feet and worked her way up to the top of my head telling me what she was doing the whole time she was working. I never felt invaded or uncomfortable and to my amazement my body began to relax again and I started to fight off the sleep. After she finished she got out her bowls and struck them. It was amazing... the sound had changed from a thud to a clear bell sound and I could feel the vibration of the bowl ring though my whole body. I could feel it and knew where I felt it inside as my body began to sing with vibration with the bowls.

I came home that weekend healed and a new person. A dear friend gave me a book soon after and as soon as I could I began to read and was learning everything I could about working with the energy and Reiki. I found a teacher in Arlington and signed up for the class! Now, I know what it is like to be on both sides of the table.

Many Blessings,
Ana

Addictions

2008-11-29T12:25:00.000-08:00

Addiction can be a scary word when we think about it and associate it with alcohol, food and drugs. But addiction can be about so many other things that we never think about. Did you know that we can have addictions to people ? I think we call it Codependency.... We can be addicted to places or things to.

For me I do have an addiction and it didn't come up until it showed up on a test that the Dr. was running. Lucky for me that my Dr. was nice in putting it in a mild way about it could effect my hormones. Oh yeah my addiction is caffeine. I love coffee, tea and chocolate which are all loaded in caffeine. A little bit is good for the heart but too much of anything is not good for the upkeep and wellness of the body.

Do you know how hard it is to be a woman living in Texas and be without caffeine? The first few days were a nightmare for my family when I announced that I was just fine without it and decided to quite cold turkey.

Then there are the Moms who offer us a cup of coffee or tea when we visit or the friend who has a beautiful box of chocolate on the table and wants to share. Of course there are those wonderful baking friends who make these delightful desserts that have names like "Chocolate Sin" or "Double Dutch Chocolate" and have made them just for you. It is everywhere!!!!

What is eating out when you can't have a nice cold glass of ice tea? OK, I want to applaud those amazing people who stop their addictions and never look back. I am finding that for me temptation is always around the corner.

Ana

On the Sunny Side

2008-11-29T07:22:00.000-08:00

I had to laugh at myself as I ordered a plate of eggs and the waitress asked me how I wanted them cooked. Instantly, I had a flashback of my childhood as a small child, waking up with my Dad and playing at the table while he fixed the coffee and breakfast for our family. Mom used to try to get that extra wink of sleep before getting up and caring for me and running a working ranch in Presidio, Texas. That gave my father extra time to paint and write during the day.

I used to love all the things he cooked for breakfast except when he cooked the sunny side up eggs whose yoke always ran all over my plate touching the other food and contaminating it with its yucky slime.

I am not sure what happened that day because Dad was always on my side, but he and Mom decided I needed the extra protein and that I should eat my eggs. It then became a force of wills of who would win and anyone messing with a five year old knows what that is like. I sat there for at least an hour looking at those things looking back at me. Gagging on one bite and waiting for the dog who was excused from the kitchen to disobey and bail me out... Not a chance....

Next my thoughts shot over to an expression my friend only recently shared with me as she was going though a tough time in her life.... "Ana, How do you eat an elephant? " "I don't know," I replied. "The answer is, ONE BITE AT A TIME." This is so true with any hardships that we are faced with in life.....

Then I heard the Waitress ask again, "How do you want your eggs cooked?"

"Oh," I said, "why Sunny Side Up of course."

Ana

Cell Memory

2008-11-28T03:08:00.000-08:00

What is cell memory you might ask? Well, it is something I think that we all should know about because it can effect everyone of us and our relationships with others. One of the key aspects of it is that physical, verbal abuse and trauma are recorded in the body the same. Doesn't matter what actually happened it is all the same as far as the body is concerned which puts out a signal of "fight or flight".

What does this mean? Well, it means that a person who suffered any kind of trauma will often find that feeling of fight or flight when a trigger goes off in the body. By trigger, I mean that if a person, often without conscious awareness feels as though they are put in a similar situation will react. The body which has recorded that pattern of trauma will put out a signal that there is danger which sends a chemical reaction through the body. The body then recognizes the signal in the cells as a warning and reacts to the trigger.

This can mean one minute you are having a lovely time with someone and the next that person may be upset, angry or wanting to leave. The whole key is finding what caused the trigger to go off and learning more about the trauma. Once this is established then it can help both parties as a base to work through the trauma and help strengthen a relationship without feeling helpless.

I had a personal experience like this happen while I was visiting Italy this summer with my husband and family. It was when we were in Venice and I found myself surrounded by all the pigeons. Lucky for me, my husband and I had discussed it before we went to Italy that it may happen and I was prepared to deal with it as it came. He even picked the words "Blueberry pancakes" as a code word to remind me in case I needed to leave or he felt that I needed to go.

Now that sounds funny when we look back on it now but it was not then and I had to remember what caused the reaction. We had always known that I was a little nervous around birds when friends had them as pets and always asked if I wanted to hold them. But it wasn't until I was talking to my Mom on the phone one day that a memory began to pop up of an incident that happened when I was three and we were in Italy.

I remembered my Mom used to take me to Rome to do some of her shopping. And while she was looking at the beautiful merchandise that was often outside on the plaza I would let go of her hand and run around close playing with my toys. I guess it was because I was small that the pigeons would swarm all around me as they did with everyone else and land on me in large numbers. All I remember was screaming as a sea of birds covered me and my mother was running to help me.

One of the things that I found even now that has not changed are the pigeons. They are so friendly that often they crowded around you and perched.

Looking back I realized that because of the patience and caring of my husband that walking on the plaza and confronting an old childhood terror that I was able to really enjoy being with my family and moving past my fear even though I was still feeling that old feeling of flight.... No pun intended!

Ana

The Shadow Self

2008-11-27T07:10:00.000-08:00

Often when I think about the "Shadow" it reminds me of a comic book character that I used to read with all my guy friends as a kid. They even made a movie of it. It wasn't until recently that I found out that there is a Shadow and that it is in everyone walking the earth.

Of course the first reaction is "thats is not true!"......But it is the truth. In each and everyone of us, we carry a side, that is our darker self or nature. I guess it is what we would say that the devil made us do it or feel things we so often deny because we are afraid of it. But truth be known, it is something that we should not be afraid of because like the character in the comic book it has something to teach us about ourselves.

The Shadow Self is something we cover up and push away and pretend it doesn't exist until one day we see that side of ourselves leaking out and fear creeps in that others will judge us. I spent a few hours pouring out my own heart to an amazing healer and teacher in Taos, New Mexico, whom I had the priviledge to meet a year ago. It was then that he stopped me in mid-sentence and told me that the Shadow that I was afraid of was the part that drove me to learn and succeed in my own life. That without it I would have no drive and would sit somewhere quietly without the desire to move as I do.

He said, that I should look at that side of myself and honor what it had to teach me by aknowaldge that that part existed. It is as he said, by exploring the darker half of ourselves that we can find a way to use that energy as a positive energy in our lives in motivating ourselves and others. By accepting who we are and what we carry inside, we grow both emotionally and spiritually as we move through our lives.

Yes, be aware that the Shadow has a negative side to it but by knowing that part of ourselves and learning about it, we tame the dragon living in all of us that can create so much good in our lives and others.

Many Blessings, Ana

Gratitude

2008-11-26T12:38:00.000-08:00

Last night I had the honor of attending another one of Daniel's classes at his home. A meditation on gratitude. I thought this was a great idea because I felt like I had come a long way from where I was last year at this time. Plus, I was not cooking Thanksgiving dinner, which everyone else was grateful for. (I am not known as a good cook) Not my thing........

As I drove, I was praying out loud that God would not place any crazy people in my space tonight, and that I would be really grateful. I had had a stresser of a day and just couldn't deal with it that night. I arrived and was warmly greeted by the host and hostess. The guests were friendly and inviting. A new friend, who I have just became acquainted with, was there. His name is Joseph and we share a rich background in New Mexico.

I asked Joseph what was his line of work was and he replied, "a teacher".
OK, "what kind of teacher?" "Oh," he said, "I teach French and Spanish". " I guess you are very fluent" I said.....to late it was already out of my mouth...... He smiled and said, "Ana, you of all people should know this from our background in New Mexico." Embarrassed I added...... "Well, I only know enough to get arrested!" His reply was as the whole room had stopped to listen in..... "Then let's not tell anyone shall we".

With that Daniel started the meeting and I sat there thinking of Mark Twain and a quote that always seemed to fit. It kind of goes like this. "It is better to not say a thing, than to open your mouth and let everyone know how really ignorant you really are."
Daniel had decided while preparing for the class, that we were going to have a group discussion instead of a mediation. Oh great...... I thought. Knowing that I was not feeling like talking since I had already opened my big mouth...... I guess I am putting my listening ears on.........

The man next to me had started a group called "Love" and as it started out I was not quite understanding him....... I was thinking, "Oh yeah, I asked not to sit by someone like this...." But as I started to listen to him, he spoke about his new mission..... "Love" a group that meets and does things for the community I felt my heart opening up. He started a month ago and 180 people have joined in the cause to give their time and help others......

They just delivered food baskets for Thanksgiving on their own and his volunteers delivered them door to door. He told a story; that at the very end they were unloading baskets and a car was driving past the group very slowly.... He had this feeling that he needed to stop the car. He did, and the guy driving had his wife, kids and mother in the car. The man said, "I didn't do anything wrong. We just want to go home. "

He said all he knew to do was to shove the food basket through the door. The man saw what he was doing and started to cry..... some of the volunteers that saw couldn't believe the emotions that was passing between the two men. Emails later flooded the group, of people who were blessed by witnessing what took place.

All the man could say was the gratitude he felt that the man excepted his gift. By doing that it completed the circle of the two being grateful to each other.

Another women began to talk and opened up about a relationship she had and how God had shown her that by looking at the heart of this other person's soul she could see the love that this person had for her even though the person had been very tough on her.

The whole evening went on like that, story after story, and I sat in my silence. I realized that I was grateful to be allowed to sit among the giants.

Ana

The Other Side of Fear

2008-11-26T11:06:00.000-08:00

I met Daniel a few weeks after I left my position at a small church as the Healing Director. I was searching for a missing piece of myself. A friend had invited me to one of his workshops on Meditation and I really felt no urge to go but as the week went by I was feeling more and more of a pull in that direction.

"OK," I yelled as I woke up that morning and asked my very sleepy husband to drive me because I was only going to poke my head in the door see what they were doing and leave. As usual it didn't quite go as planned. Daniel saw me and invited me in to join the class. I don't know when it actually happened but I began to relax and became my true self as we went though the meditations.

Later after class, I asked him if he taught any other classes. "Yes, a few and one you might like to try" "Oh yeah?" I asked.... " Yes, he said, "the class dealing with your personal fears and in the end you have the chance to walk on a hot bed of coals." "Oh, Not my thing!" I remembered saying.........

A month later there I was signed up and sitting in his "Fire Walking" class. Wondering, how it happened. The only thing was that the place that was hosting the walk had not come though so we were not able to fire walk that day but walking on broken glass barefoot, breaking an arrow with the tip at your soft part of your neck and breaking a board with your hand was offered.

I listen intently as he gave the seminar during the day knowing full well, I was going to bow out of participating in the thrill seekers part at the end. In my family I am the cautious one. I hold everyone's coat at Six Flags.... Not me, I was just taking the part of the class that dealt with your fears.

He explained that "Fear is all about being a little uncomfortable. Mostly it is a new experience that we have no data on so we become fearful but once we get past it we look back and realize that it was a valuable lesson in our lives. Fear is what challenges us to grow in all aspects of our lives and only we have the power to change it inside ourselves."

I remember him handing out the hard board and me knocking on it with my knuckles and feeling how hard it was. I guess, I made a face because he stopped the class and said," Ana, What was that face you made?" Tell me what you are thinking". "Great! I am thinking, now I can tell everyone that I don't think that I can do this"..... All eyes on me now...........my face giving me away....

My answer went like this...... "Well,.... I guess I am afraid?"......... "What if I fail?" "Close your eyes," he said "and see yourself standing at the board and see your hand moving though the board and stopping at the other side." I am very visual and this came up in a flash. "I see it" but..... but.... I guess I doubt it? ...... Then he, shouted to the class..... "let's go out and break some boards!" A hand on my shoulder and a words of encouragement "Ana, you can do this, you need to trust yourself."

Well, I love gentleman, all the women went first and broke their boards and I was the last one standing with all eyes on me again. I walked up like I was facing the guillotine and placed my board between the blocks and with the count of one, two, three, my hand sliced through the board like butter. The walking on glass and breaking the arrow with my neck were all the same. Me being the last but each a success. There were a few that did not have the some luck but I think my Angels must have felt like I needed the extra boost that day.

Now, when I am faced with fear in my heart. I know I can move though it and it is all about trying something new and being a little uncomfortable because success is what on the other side of fear.

Ana

The Dark Night of the Soul

2008-11-26T07:11:00.000-08:00

I don't know if it is true in your house but in my house when someone mentions the "Dark Night" the word Batman seems to follow. Well, this is something quite different when it comes to the experience of the human soul. No, it is not a bad thing but a description of what it is to be totally alone.

Usually it comes at a point of your life when you and your soul are making a major transition and sometimes you feel like you were abandoned by everyone including God. It is a time of trial and reflection with in your own being. Often people will not be able to sleep or feel depressed because they feel completely alone. What got my attention when I have read about these cases and even felt that on a lesser level that it is when inspiration, creativity and art were born out of the experience.

I was talking to my teacher and she said" Ana, think about this when you go into a sweat lodge and you are in the dark pulling out all your impurities and praying that true inspiration will hit. It is also when you leave the darkness of the lodge and return to the outside with the sun hitting you in the face that you feel apart of something much more bigger than yourself. It is a time of inner reflection. A feeling of being new again because you have faced your deepest fears."

Wow, when you look at it that way then facing our fears in our lives and deep in our soul , is not a bad thing but a way of renewing and remembering that even though we feel completely alone, God never abandons us even when we can't hear him. He is and will be always be with us, even as a spark of inspiration in the Dark nights of the Soul.

Bright Blessings, Ana

Power of the Human Dream

2008-11-25T11:42:00.000-08:00

The term to "dis-em-power someone" is a term that I really never gave much thought about as I was going though my everyday life. At least it wasn't until I heard about this wonderful teacher whom I wanted to take classes from.

That morning I was excited about meeting with this person in my life and discussing some of the exciting things that were happening, along with finding when the class was to start up so that I could began to learn.

I think it was in the beginning of the conversation that she brought up the term "dis-em-powering" someone else. What was that? My thoughts quickly turned over to someone being held down on a Karate mat...Then she explained that it was "taking someone else's power away."

She used me as an example, that I had come to her with a dream that I felt very called to do and wanted her blessing and to know if I was doing it right. Her answer was that, "if it was what I felt in my own heart, that the way I did things were what I was to do to make it happen, then I should continue on my journey in life, because I knew what was best for me, in that situation for what I was called for.

Then she said "Ana, What if I told you that you were doing things all wrong?"

"Of course," I said, "I would stop and then I would not put my words into action."
"Well, then all those people who would benefit from your dreams would lose out because I took your power to make it not happen." "Look what happens when you give your power away or someone else takes it from you." "The joy is gone and everyone loses in the end."

I think it was then, that I realized how humbling it was to hold someone else's heart in your hand and that words could make or break someone else's dreams when they looked up to you. In all the different roles that we play as parents, friends and different family members our responsibility are massive in in-powering each other to be successful in life as opportunities arise. Most of the time we don't even realize that we hold something precious in our hands.

I went away with a reflection of myself and what my own actions and intentions were with the ones that were placed around me, in my life. Also who it was that I give my own power away to.

Blessings, Ana

The Space Between the Lines

2008-11-25T11:30:00.000-08:00

What is the space between the lines you ask? Why it is life..... What else would it be? I love this phrase even the first time I heard it. I realized that there is more to life and relationships than just the solid line of commitment. There were all the spaces that were not filled in on the whole sheet of paper.

It is what it is... the space between the musical notes written on a page, when played it fills the air creating music. It is the whole story of a life with all it's passion, love, inspirations and hardships that create a book of an individual.

It can also be a feeling or gut reaction that inspires you to hold out your hand to a friend in need. It is what being human is all about. The Space between the lines.........

Peace
Ana

The Butterfly Story

2008-11-23T06:53:00.000-08:00

Once, I was visiting a dear friend who has an amazing gift for healing. We were discussing what it was to help people in their struggles of life. I was expressing my idea that was to get in there and roll up my sleeves and help them get though the whole mess by walking side by side with them on their path of hardship.

She thought for a moment....... Then she said....."I want to tell you a story about an old man and a butterfly." OK," I was in for a story. "Well," she said, "I don't remember where I got this from but I feel it is a good time to share it because I think it will help you with helping others."

"Once there was this old man who was in the garden and he found this worm who he knew would turn into a beautiful butterfly. So he took the worm into his house and put it into a terrarium. He was so happy and he went out and got all the best leaves for food and made sure that the worm was warm and well cared for. Everyday he would watch it and feed it and took great care to meet all its needs."

"Then one day the worm began to spin it's cocoon. Again the old man took pains to see that the cocoon was in a safe place. The day finely came when he realized that the cocoon had a crack in it and the butterfly inside was struggling to get out and be free. He very carefully placed it in his hands and helped it in its plight to be released from its cocoon."

"Finally it was set free and the butterfly began to spread its beautiful wings to fly. But something happened and as the old man was gently holding this amazing creature in his hands it began to die. It struggled and soon gave up and died in his hands."

She stopped there and said "Ana, sometimes when we help people too much we push the ones we love off their intended path in life and without the struggle and pain they never reach their full potential and strength to do as the Creator has made them for. By helping too much we are not blessing, but hurting them in their journey."

I had a lot to think about that day...........

Blessings,
Ana

Soul Mate

2008-11-23T06:01:00.000-08:00

I once had a friend that asked me what I thought about Soul Mates? I had thought about it and always believed that my husband whom I have a wonderful marriage of 18 years was my Soul Mate. This had been a hot topic in our marriage because he disagreed.

My idea of a Soul Mate was this childhood fantasy of someone made in the universe that was made just for me. The perfect union of souls and love come together with the blessings of the Creator Himself along and His band of Angels.

"No," he would argue "I love you and I choose to be with you in this life." We finely agreed to just disagree with the whole mess. So when others brought up this topic we would smile at each other as the Violins began to play for me and he would set his chin firmly and we would walk away.

It wasn't until a friend invited me to a Healing Seminar when the Teacher came in and started talking about "Soul Mates." I was so excited because now I had someone of authority who could validate my feelings and I could triumphantly bring this to his attention.

The whole talk went like this........ Most people have it wrong when they think that a Soul Mate is someone out there in the world that was hand tailored for you and only you. A Soul Mate is not about a romantic love as we see in Fairy Tales but a person who will bring out your Shadow Side. This is a person who's task is to make us uncomfortable enough to change or move in the way that the Creator has designed for us. Another words "they can kick you in the teeth to get you to grow spiritually."

What most people get confused about is the "Life Mate." The person in our lives who are there for us by being there as a person who will cherish, support, love and help us in life as we grow and as we will do the same for them.

Well, this hit home because I had realized that the number one person in my life was more than special but someone that I could always count on even when my shadow side slipped out. We had been there for each other in the good and the bad and never was there a question of not loving the other.

It was a long drive home but when I returned home there was my adoring husband anxiously awaiting my safe return........

Ana

The Souls of the Feet

2008-11-23T05:02:00.000-08:00

Last week while I was having tea at a friend's house she was telling me about how sensitive the soles of the feet are. Knowing that she had spent time in New Mexico learning about herbs I decided to listen to what she was saying with an open mind.

"No, really", she said! "Try this sometime by taking fresh garlic that you cut up and rub it on the bottom of the feet. In a few hours you will be able to taste it with your tongue."

Of course it wasn't until I woke up the next morning at 4am that the thought that came to me that how many times had I heard that in the Bible that not only did they wash their feet but also smudge oils or different kinds of herbs on the bottom of their feet.

Could this not only be a way to care and cleans the feet but actually a way of caring for the whole body as a whole? I have heard stories of people in the past putting Vick's on their children's feet when they had a cold and it would help them breath better.

If our feet are that sensitive then by not caring for them properly can we have an effect on the whole body? Wow, this puts Athlete's Foot in a whole new category.........

What is in the inside of our shoes? What about foot powders and sprays?

Things that make you go Hmmmmmmm....................

Ana

Soul Separation

2008-11-21T05:31:00.000-08:00

There is something you may have heard of but might not really paid attention to and that is soul separation or better known as soul loss. Let's get into the term and what it means before you decide that it is something scary.........

Soul loss is about having a dramatic experience or trauma that makes you feel like you have lost something of yourself. Have you ever said, " I don't feel like myself today"? Maybe you said," I am just not all here"?

Now with that in mind, think about an experience or situation where you gave away your personal power or someone else took it. Maybe something happened to you that was really bad. It doesn't matter whether it was a physical experience or an emotional experience the body records it all the same.
If you talk to someone who has been physically abused or emotionally abused the body is taking notes on the whole experience and as the drama plays out a little piece of the soul will often times separate from the body to go to a safe place to escape the pain to survive. This process is called soul loss and has been recorded by millions of Therapist and Psychiatrists around the world.
There is nothing unnatural about it because it is the way we were created to survive by the great Creator Himself. When a piece of the soul separates from the body sometimes it returns and we began to move though the pain to heal so that we can deal with what happened to us. But often times it does not come back and we feel pain and loss when we revisit the trauma or we simply don't remember what happened.

It is because of the latter that we need to find someone who can journey back with us to the trauma and help us find ourselves so that we can begin the healing process. Once this happens we will begin to feel like we are whole again and our loss of personal power will start to mend. Self esteem will grow and the feeling that we have purpose and will to do as we were created to do will come back.

If for any reason that you feel like you have lost

a piece of yourself to someone or a situation don't blow it off but honor yourself by acknowledgedling that this has happened and find someone who can help you. You will be much more of a Blessing to loved ones and others if you are complete.

Ana

Food and Digestion

2008-11-20T16:43:00.000-08:00

Did you know that the way you are feeling when you eat can effect the way your body digests your food? I am not kidding you. It is true! How many times has anyone been in a bad mood or angry with someone and felt bad after eating?

Now wrap your mind around this.... When you pray over your food or bless the food you are about to eat with a sincere attitude then you are helping to change the molecular structure of your food that will be more compatible to your digestion. Of course this means if you are in a better mood.
Makes you think about eating when you are not in a compatible mood......

Feeling good about yourself and others along with blessing the food will help you digest and will do a better job feeding your body. All this will help you be all that you can be as you walk though this world....

Blessings, Ana

The Gift of Intention

2008-11-20T16:16:00.000-08:00

I love this time of year because we are all getting ready for the holiday shopping to give gifts to the many people in our lives. And all of this has me thinking of the many types of gifts and the many meanings that are attached to them. We give gifts this time of year because of the Spirit of the season, but do we stop and think about what the intention is behind the different gifts we give?

Now lets change the meaning of the season over to a deeper perspective...... We give gifts to people because we love them. We give gifts to people out of guilt or to say goodbye. We give gifts to people to get something back. We give gifts to people to get out of things and say I am sorry. We often give gifts to others for the main purpose of tying some type of payment from the other person or we just feel sorry for them.....

The whole idea of gift giving is what is inside the heart. The intention as one of my Teachers tells me, "what are the true intentions behind a gift?"
Is the gift something of value and meaningful to form the heart of the person who gave?

The true value of the gift is what is in the givers heart. The intention of the gift that is what will be remembered and cherished.

Many Blessings, Ana

Emotional Energy

2008-11-18T08:59:00.000-08:00

OK, yesterday I was talking a little about vibrations and how they effect us and what we are sending out which includes emotional energy. What is emotional energy? Why it is the energy attached to an emotion? Confused?

When you look at it this way........ All emotions have energy that makes our body react to someone or something. It can also effect the way people perceive us. (So far so good) Again a lot like vibrations. This energy can be so powerful because it can motivate us to move and change things. Go ask Pancho Villa....

These emotions can cause invisible waves that can be sent to others or to situations. If bad, you might know this as "stirring the pot" and often it can sway or cause damage to a situation or person. Emotions of love can cause the receiver to feel really good or be annoyed with someone. Either way these emotions are sending out signals.

When I was a little girl and I was living on a ranch. My dad taught me about working with the animals. I learned that if I carried fear in my heart it was immediately sensed by the animal and it would react. If there was trust and love in my heart the animal sensed that to.

One day my dad took me to a place where he had a cardboard box and inside was a rattlesnake. He asked me if I wanted the snake to live or die. The choice was mine. I have a great fear of snakes and my first thought was to kill it. Then the thought of why should my fear have anything to do with the decision of life and death over this animal and we lived on a ranch. Live,,,,, was my decision.

Dad said for me to stand back and to watch. He put the box on it's side and the snake went into a coil.... It was preparing to strike and as I watched my father reminded me of my fear and he squatted down and began to talk to the snake. He told it "that it was free to go and that we were not going to hurt it." He also said that " We respected the snake's life and would live on the same land as neighbors". As I watched the snake slowly uncoiled and finely slithered off into the bush. My Dad said that "it was the love in the our hearts of another living creature which the snake understood". Even a rattlesnake!

Though this experience and many more that just happen day to day on a working ranch I learned that what I carried in my heart is also picked up by the heart. This I found later in working with others in an office situation. People and animals pick up the invisible waves of energy though their bodies.

Please know that emotional energy can get stuck in our bodies and can cause all kind of physical problems and illness. You must take care to check on this if you are in a very stressful situation or other.........But that is another story.

Blessings,
Ana

Vibrations?

2008-11-17T06:54:00.000-08:00

I forget that the term "vibrations" is not widely used, so after someone asked to explain the term I decided to give a better understanding of the word.

We and everything around us are made up of some kind of molecular structure. There is no hocus pocus in this term. We have atoms that are always moving all around us, as we learned in science class at school. Everything whether we see it moving or not is moving.

The true miracle of what happens is that energy can effect the way that these atoms move. Energy can come in the form of sound, emotions , heat or other. Now, Think about this........ Radio waves move though the air and TV moves though the air which is not seen yet we know it is there.

Emotions and thoughts are the same way. Your thoughts have more power than you realize. It can change your molecular structure into someone who is positive and people are excited to be around or into someone negative that others avoid.

The human body is amazing in the way that it picks up these energies. Thank about the last time you walked in a place or meeting and the hair on the back of your neck stood up. When was the last time you were around someone who was stressing you out and your stomach was hurting or someone who you just couldn't wait to be around? Your body was picking up the energy from that person.

Now lets put this in perspective...... If you are sending off negative signals your body or atoms begin to vibrate in that way and people who are in the same state will be attracted to you. So will anything that is not seen with the naked eye. If you send off positive signals then the body vibrates in a higher form and people with that vibration will feel comfortable and will be more attracted to your vibration. That is why we attract the same type of person over and over in our lives.

The choice is really up to you.........

Sometimes we leave this energy on things around us. If a person was depressed and sat in this one chair all the time and finely decided to sell it in a garage sale and you bought it. You may get it home and feel that this chair gives you a funny feeling or makes you uncomfortable. You are picking up the energy off the chair from the other person. This is when you need to decide to get rid of it or change the vibration. This is called cleansing. It can be done by praying over the chair or asking someone to help who knows how to cleans it. "Changing the Vibrations".

Many Blessings,
Ana

Relationships

2008-11-16T09:31:00.000-08:00

I just learned that often we leave relationships when the two souls no longer vibrate at the same level. Thank about it, we either vibrate higher or lower or the same as someone else and when the vibes changes so does the relationship.

This is also true with situations that we find ourselves in. Awhile go, I had the experience of feeling like the song "Angel Flying Low to the Ground" and the energy was being sucked out of me. The situation was very bad for me and every time I left I would renew and could fly again but would come back into that situation and then felt drained and low.

Once I left the situation and the relationships that were holding me down my spirit began to soar. Now, I am once again experiencing flight and beautiful and amazing people that seem to vibrate on the same level have come into my life giving me wings again to spread out and fly.

Yes, we all have our days that we are down but when we leave those lower vibes and move into the higher levels our souls become inspired and God opens the doors for us once again. So if someone in your life is leaving , or you are leaving that relationship remember that is is just the way God created us and it is OK. someone or some situation is waiting just around the corner to connect with your vibration.

I love, what one of my Teacher's says........ 'Ana, always stay on the high road"

She meant "Stay in the higher Vibrations"....... "Smile"

Blessings, Ana

Personal Power

2008-09-16T15:17:00.000-07:00

Personal Power is something I have been on the search for since I became aware that I had lost it. Many of us lose it in our early childhood or forget that we have it and often if we do find it we give it to someone who doesn't deserve it. We compromise ourselves and put ourselves in powerless positions where we can't move because of fear when deep down inside of ourselves we are prisoners of our own loss of power.

Finding our personal power is taking back our lives and forgiving ourselves so that we can begin to heal. I say begin because this just does not happen over night. There is much to overcome and the hardest part is being gentle with ourselves so that we can listen to our own hearts.

Losing one's power is splitting ourselves in two and sometimes into many. So we begin the journey by waking up and becoming aware of our losses. Then the process of finding out who we are and where all the pieces that we have lost are hidden becomes an amazing puzzle as we piece together our lives. So as we start on this private journey from within the Healing process begins.....