Repetive Relationship Energy Patterns

I have noticed as I have been working on myself that there seem to be energy patterns that show up during the week. This week what showed up was more about being stuck in a relationship energy pattern that repeats itself throughout one's lifetime. I found that to be something that showed up not only in my own life but in others when I was visiting with them. Some of the people that I talked to knew about the patterns existing and others had no clue or awareness that it was happening to them.

The frustration when in a situation like this is like having a song stuck in your head and no matter what you do you can't seem to get it to stop playing over and over. It is in those instances that you are either aware that it is there making itself visible for a special reason as the song has found a niche in your brain or you wait it out.

In the case of stuck energy patterns there is always a lesson and the way you handle the lesson allows one to explore it until mastered or it will continue to repeat itself later on in your lifetime. I had an interesting conversation with someone who was very aware of a repeating behavioral energy pattern that kept showing up in their relationships. They could trace the energy pattern from childhood through their personal relationships and on into their life now. The pattern seemed to repeat itself when they entered into a new relationship and each time they had a chance to figure it out trying different ways to approach it. As they described the different situations with the repeated pattern I found myself thinking of that old movie with Bill Murray called Groundhog Day.

If you are not familiar with Groundhog Day it is a movie where Bill Murray plays the part of a weatherman who is not a very nice fellow and is really unhappy with his life. In the movie he gets an assignment to report on an annual event called Groundhog day that is celebrated in a small town in Pennsylvania. There he gets stuck in a time loop that repeats the same day over and over giving him the opportunity to reexamine his life trying out different scenarios until he finds his meaning in life. I find that this movie even though it a comedy is really very close to what we as human beings experiences in our own lives.

Other people that I came in contact with were also trying to figure out repetitive relationship patterns that continue in their lives. As people talked about their relationships they all had different experiences but the same energy pattern would surface in various ways in those relationships even though all the players changed. This was not only noticeable in one person but could be traced back in whole families.

What seemed to make a huge difference was not just knowing that there was a break in the relationship energy pattern but taking the initiative to really step into one's own personal power. That meant recognizing, owning, and making choices that were very different to what the individual was used to. Stepping into one's own fears to dissolve the energy pattern seemed to be the hard but with higher results of helping to create balance in their lives. For example if one is afraid to be alone then it is time to learn how to live with oneself and be comfortable with that energy before finding a companion. Another example would be the fear of needing to be needed and learning how to take care of one's self before taking care of everyone else.  The fear of trust was also a big one learning that one must find that peace and trust within one's self before trying to find it in others. The same with love. If one can't find it within themselves to love and accept themselves then how can one really know how to love and accept others.  

The biggest obstacles that one faces from these experiences seem to be fear, denial, trust, love, and forgiveness.  The change comes from within as we learn to re-examine what has held us back from ourselves and our relationships with others. What we learn from this is that we as human beings have that power to make choices that can change the way that we learn to see ourselves and others in relationships. When this lesson is finished then there will be other lessons to learn but the greatest  satisfaction is knowing that we mastered the energy pattern learning how to escape through the maze.

Past, Present, & Future

I had a very inserting conversation with my husband at breakfast this morning regarding what I was going to write about on the Artini blog. I told him that the theme that kept popping up this week was about the past, present and future. I explained that what came to me as I was moving through my own experiences in my life events during the week was how lucky we were as human beings to be able to experience all three and that we were not always bound to one or the other. I had also been thinking a lot about the norm of teaching in the last ten years which has really been focusing on the here and now. What I find in my own understanding is the blessings of all three directions.

The question that popped up in our conversation was that if we had a turbulent past it might be best to be grounded in the now to be able to move into the past without experiencing all the emotional trauma knowing that we were now in a safe place. What came out of that question was that when we are going back into the past where things in our lives have hurt us deeply we often bottle up the emotions and the event up within our cellar and our emotional bodies. This in turn tends to builds up a nest of emotional pain that is often destined to explode once triggered when we least expect it. Yes, it is important to ground in the safe place but what if the now is not experienced as safe then how do we move into actual healing?

On the other hand if we look at the past and it drums up some very lovely and happy memories this allows those emotions to come forward when we find ourselves in a situation that we need to move through. This is when you hear the phrase, "Find your happy place." In those cases we enjoy the energy that is stored in those past memories. Feelings of happiness or things that make us laugh also create a higher energy in our physical bodies and energy fields that bring balance back into our whole being.

As a visionary if we look at hope it is an emotion that projects into the future a positive energy that allows us to create opportunities that might change the current or past situation. Looking at the future and things that can shift events in our lives help us to set a course to move in a direction that may find a way out of a maze that may be unhealthy for us at the time. One example of this may be the loss of a job or even in a job that is unsuited to the skills that we have to offer.

What is interesting to see when looking at the big picture is that we as human beings have the ability to navigate through our experiences in our own past, present and future when we need to find a possibility to move in a different direction. That means locating where we need to ground whether it is in the past, present, or future to move through a tough experience in our lives or even to heal ourselves. The true gift is choosing what works best for us and the situations that lead us into our own successes in our personal experience of healing. The one thing that I see is that if we only stay in one timeframe then we limit ourselves from moving in a direction or where we need to go...

"Sleepwalking while Awake"

My father used to tell me when I was very young that I was asleep. I didn't understand it at the time as I thought I knew what being fully awake was all about in the daylight hours. I realize know that I had no clue at that time in my life of what he was talking about. It was much later that I discovered what he really meant by saying that most people in the world are sleepwalking while they are awake.

Looking back I now see that we as human beings can be caught up in our own experience without the full awareness of all that is going around us. Not only do we miss other human and animal experience that make us a bit uncomfortable we often deny ourselves any emotional attachment to be involved. Part of our own awakening is to not only becoming aware of what is going on around us but to choose how to become active participants in the world in which we live in.

I know that many will say, "Hold on there I participate in many organizations". That of course is good but it is when we open our eyes and see those around us in need that we understand that it is more than just attending a meeting or working with an organization. It is really dipping our feet into the muddy water and walking across the creek. It may even be getting into the mud and out of our own comfort zone becoming a little uncomfortable to help those in need around us. How many times have we stood by when knew intuitively that there was something for us to do?

Each one of us carries a special purpose that is held in our own hearts. So many of us have lost what it is that is our own mission in life or forgotten what it is that we are supposed to do. We spend hours even days trying to fill our lives with some kind of purpose and meaning only to find that we can't fill that empty space that grows inside of us. This is when we discover that whatever we have been doing is not something that we would look back on in our last hours of life knowing that we have done a job well done. Feelings of guilt and regret of things in life that were offered that were missed opportunities to really experience and participate in life can way heavy on one's soul in the last hours of departing from this world.

What makes us human is that we have that opportunity to be consciously aware of every act and word that we say that helps change the negative and positive energy in the world. We don't have to choose to switch off our brain and go into auto pilot. We have a choice to allow ourselves to be conscious in that moment as we move through an experience to learn what it is that makes us uniquely us. We have that ability to discover when we are involved with others not only people but the animals and plants that populate the earth that we have a purpose in our lives. We have the power to step into our own lives and change our circumstance and help make a difference in the circumstance of others instead of living in a world of sleepwalkers.

Instead of turning a blind eye to what we see is ugly in the world we can make a difference even if it is very small. A small act of kindness by one can turn into a mountain if we take that step to reach out to others and not be afraid of being inconvenienced. In the very large scheme of things that is what it is really all about.

     

"The Illusion of Separation"

When I was growing up my father who was unique in his own way and some would call a cosmic cowboy would often like to tell stories around the campfire in his tepee. One of the stories that he liked to tell was handed down to him from one of his good friends who was a medicine man who practiced among his people in New Mexico.

The story as I recall was a creation story which started with the Great Spirit or the Creator who was creating everything and anything with a single thought. One word in the mind of the Great Spirit and it would come into being. When my father told the story as he was a great story teller and would go to great lengths into the details of the whole narrative. What I remember now since it has been a long number of years was that when the Great Spirit was creating the universe as we know it he spent a great deal of love and compassion forming the idea of what his creation would be like. In that moment it became formed in the physical dimension. It was when the Creator of all things was examining it and tenderly enjoying his work that his hand slipped and he dropped it. It was when he dropped his exquisite creation that it cracked and then shattered into many pieces.

At first the Great Spirit was sad that his beautiful creation had broken but when he picked up the pieces he discovered that the pieces wanted to fit back together again to become whole. One of the pieces was a being that broke into two creating male and female. To the Creator's delight he had created something different and brought into light the desire to be united as one and to the Great Spirit himself. It was with that single thought he saw that his masterpiece had an intelligence and was good so he left it for the pieces to reunite with each other to become one again.

The reason I bring up this little story of creation was that I was reminded last week that often we forget weather we are conscious of it or not that there is still deep within us written in our subconscious and our DNA a feeling of wanting to be united as a whole not only to each other but to the Great Spirit of all. What I see is a world with the illusion that separates us from each other. We as humans and our thought process we wonder about with amnesia wondering why we exist and how we are supposed to be connected. We find in what we create or often what we see and experience is the separation with a longing need to be united. We want world peace yet we choose sides and place our energy with one or the other. We separate ourselves by race, religion, ideas, politics, economics etc...

What I find so powerful is if we as a whole on a conscious level come to the conclusion that we are far from being separated and recognize that we have swallowed the illusion of separation. If we were to awaken to the understanding that on a higher level of consciousness that we are created out of the same matter by the same thought of our Creator then there wouldn't be anything we couldn't accomplish. We as a whole could raise the bar to creating a space to open up for compassion and acceptance of each other, ourselves, the animals, plants and the earth it's self. What a paradise that would be... 

"Stepping into One's Truth"

Sometimes when you are in the middle of the storm it is hard to see your way out. It can be easy when in the middle of an emotional conflict to go with the emotions forgetting about all reasoning. The truth is that there are tools for us to use in learning how to deal with conflict without creating wounds for ourselves and others.

Often enough weather it was our parents who forgot to teach us or ourselves that didn't get the memo on stepping into our truths and personal power that seems to trip us up. What I mean by this is that we have to look at the whole situation and determine what is a lie or a truth in our own life to decided how to handle a confused situation. The only problem is that the ego will often get in the way making the territory murky when we are trying to navigate in finding our real truths. This is often hard when you are in the middle of a blow up with someone you are in a relationship with.

So lets look at a situation that cause this kind of reaction finding the tangled end that leads to unraveling of the truth. Again it is determining what is the real truth or a lie in one's personal life. The example that I want to use is when someone offers a suggestion to help someone they care about but the other person takes it as a power play in trying to control their decisions. This creates a sense of persecution in the person trying to help and bruises the ego. Now the ego is hurt wanting to inflict a wound or bring up a wall as it responds out of pain. This only makes more chaos out of an already confused situation. Then the other person's ego gets into it and the two egos go to bat with each other.

Okay taking a step back.  The real question for the person who offered the advice needs to find their own truth in why they offered it. Was it because they really wanted to help or that they were in fear wanting to have some control over the other person? Let's say in this case it was genuinely wanting to help the other person. This is the truth so now after looking at one's true motives the feeling of being persecuted is also genuine. The real lie is the idea of trying to control someone else and therefor is not real. That is where the power lies in finding the the real truth. This one questions allows a person to step into their own power owning up to their personal truth. Also this can swing the other way if the person wants to control the other person it allows them to recognize where they are coming from and to exam the fear.

Back to the person with the higher intentions. Once they own their own truth and step into their power they can then afford to give the other person grace as they can see if the other person is speaking out of old wounds or out of fear. The ego can now be released as compassion for the other person steps in. This is a huge game changer lessening the tension and creating a healing space for the other person to feel safe.  Through the changes in the thinking and reasoning it changes the energy of the relationship and things begin to shift in a more positive way of communicating.

Just something else to think about... Sometimes we send mixed signals. What I mean is that we may have been raised in a household that has conflicting energy in making decisions. A good example of this is someone who tells you they don't like hamburgers and would never eat one on any occasion only to ask for one later saying that it is their favorite food. This is confusing and highly dysfunctional and if someone is raised in that kind of environment they will not have the right tools to find their own truth. Also this creates doubt and mistrust within someone with this background making it hard to even trust themselves. In this case it is important to identify to learn how to find the true motives of looking at things in deciding what is real or is a lie.  This is basics in trusting in oneself and in others. It is also very important to learn so that one can step into one's personal power.