The Other Side of Fear

I met Daniel a few weeks after I left my position at a small church as the Healing Director. I was searching for a missing piece of myself. I had been invited to one of his workshops on Meditation and really felt no urge to go but as the week went by I was feeling more and more of a pull in that direction.

"OK," I yelled as I woke up that morning and asked my very sleepy husband to drive me because I was only going to poke my head in the door see what they were doing and leave. As usual it didn't quite go as planned. Daniel saw me and invited me in to join the class. I don't know when it actually happened but I began to relax and become my true self as we went though the meditations.

Later after class, I asked him if he taught any other classes. "Yes, a few and one you might like to try" "Oh yeah?" I asked.... " Yes, he said, "the class dealing with your personal fears and in the end you have the chance to walk on a hot bed of coals." "Oh, Not my thing!" I remembered saying.........

A month later there I was signed up and sitting in his "Fire Walking" class. Wondering how it happened. The only thing was that the place that was hosting the walk had not come though so we were not able to fire walk that day but walking on broken glass barefoot, breaking an arrow with the tip at your soft part of your neck and breaking a board with your hand was offered.

I listen intently as he gave the seminar during the day knowing full well, I was going to bow out of participating in the thrill seekers part at the end. In my family I am the cautious one. I hold everyone's coat at Six Flags.... Not me, I was just taking the part of the class that dealt with your fears.

He explained that "Fear is all about being a little uncomfortable. Mostly it is a new experience that we have no data on so we become fearful but once we get past it we look back and realize that it was a valuable lesson in our lives. Fear is what challenges us to grow in all aspects of our lives and only we have the power to change it inside our selves."

I remember him handing out the hard board and me knocking on it with my knuckles and feeling how hard it was. I guess, I made a face because he stopped the class and said," Ana, What was that face you made?" Tell me what you are thinking". "Great! I am thinking, now I can tell everyone that I don't think that I can do this"..... All eyes on me now...........my face giving me away....

My answer went like this...... "Well,.... I guess I am afraid?"......... "What if I fail?" "Close your eyes," he said "and see yourself standing at the board and see your hand moving though the board and stopping at the other side." I am very visual and this came up in a flash. "I see it" but..... but.... I guess I doubt it? ...... Then he, shouted to the class..... "let's go out and break some boards!" A hand on my shoulder and a words of encouragement "Ana, you can do this, you need to trust yourself."

Well, I love gentleman, all the women went first and broke their boards and I was the last one standing with all eyes on me again. I walked up like I was facing the gillitien and placed my board between the blocks and with the count of one, two, three, my hand sliced through the board like butter. The walking on glass and breaking the arrow with my neck were all the same. Me being the last but each a success. There were a few that did not have the some luck but I think my Angels who must of felt like I needed the extra boost that day.

Now, when I am faced with fear in my heart. I know I can move though it and it is all about trying something new and being a little uncomfortable because success what is on the other side of fear.

Ana