Consciousness of the Soul

As I started to become more aware I begin to noticed that some of the people around me often identify themselves with pain, and suffering. And the fear of losing that, was the underlying fear of being left with nothing. This brought me back to a conscious evaluation of myself and my own personal motivations.

You see that what seems to annoy us the most in others are the things that others see in us. And it was at the place that I was working at the time, that pain and suffering were considered a virtue. At the time, I discovered on a level of being unconscious the need to condition myself to fit into that matter of logic.

The whole irony of the situation was that I was completely annoyed with the behaviours of the others around me but found myself trying to immerse myself in the pursuit of personal growth only to be knocked down by my own fears.

It wasn't until I finally realized that the virtues that I was seeking were not leading me down the path toward my goals of personal growth, that I decided to put an end to the insanity. Unfortunately for me, I had become attached to the people around me who shared the same experience, yet seemed somewhat disturbed and restless at the same time.

This made leaving extremely painful as my heart seemed to be ripped from my soul. My mind begin to analysis the situation to find solutions to return but my soul had called it quits. It was time to move on and becoming aware only added to my misery. I have often thought that being unaware was the answer to being happy but it is our souls that always knows the whole truth.

As I removed myself from the situation, I began to heal. I learned to, that by being unconscious in my own actions I had brought the fear, pain and suffering upon myself. I discovered that God had given me the power to release myself from the bondage I created for myself. The only chains that held me down were the ones that I put on myself willingly. I found that I was then given an opportunity to look upon the situation I was released from and learn.

As I am learning, I am discovering that being aware and conscious is being responsible for ourselves. Also that our actions toward others and toward ourselves must be held accountable as we move in our own experience.

Ana